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If you visit family 5-6 times a year, where does that leave time for vacation for yourself? I agree with the others though, if you visit only once a year then you're doing a pretty good job. Honestly, I live where I want and don't let family enter into the equation for me.
Maybe family is more important to me than it is to other people? I don't know. To me, I would like to be able to see them at least once every 2-3 months. Once a year is utterly, utterly inadequate and just plain sad. Once a year, or even twice a year, is pathetic.
Nonetheless, I will be at their house for the next 4 days, in CT.
Maybe family is more important to me than it is to other people?
Maybe.
Are you important to them? Did they try to find a way to keep you there or is it all on you now to get back there for visits?
People find ways to do those things that are meaningful. If you can't find a job where your family lives, maybe you figure out how to create one.
Otherwise you live where your career requires you to live, so that you can build a life.
EDIT: I see from another thread you lost your job in Columbus back in September and you're unemployed. In that case I once again suggest creating your own job by starting a business. It seems you have some money to live on in the meantime.
Its tough, but you have to do what makes you happy. If its happier to see them more, move closer. Even 6 hours closer can make a difference.
I moved closer to home after being far away for a long time, 20+ years. For me, I have a single son now who is six. When he is grown up, am I going to only want to see him only once a year? Heck no.
How old are you? Relatives in their 50's (and shockingly getting older!) aren't old at all....grandparents in their 80 are more understandable. A 10 hour drive is not fantastic but not outrageous either - you could split that in half and stay at a cheap hotel overnight - for a couple trips a year, anyway. Or find someone to "carpool" with on some of your trips. Get your family to come to see you at least once a year. There - you've accounted for the entire year!
But seriously, you may need to grow up a bit - lots of people see family once or twice a year - if it's a big deal, switch jobs! Btw - how do you even have that much vacation time? Obviously if you can only do weekend trips even flying is not practical...why did you move there in the first place?
I want to see my family 5-6 times per year though. And they really have no practical reason to come and visit me. I mean, they have five kids and simply cannot make multiple trips per year devoted entirely to just me. And it was my choice to relocate far away.
Now, the thing that truly sucks is that it's virtually impossible to get a suitable job in the area where they live. It's highly unlikely that I can live near them again.
How do you deal with situations like this?!
You suck it up and deal with it, like the rest of us do.
If you want to see your family 5-6 times/year, you're going to have to budget that $2,000 + and you're going to have to use some (or all) of your PTO time in order to make that happen. Or you resign yourself to seeing them less often. It's your call which option to pick. But one of the realities of adulthood is that job prospects often force folks to live farther away from their families than they'd like, and there's no real way of changing that.
Ten years ago my husband in his 50's was out of work in NY for over a year. He took the first job offered to him which was in Florida. Our children/grandkids still live in NY. Have any idea how much $$$ we have spent going back an forth to see them?
After his heart attack last year, it was time to think over the situation. Our kids were scrambling to get to Florida before Dad died. He is retiring in the Spring and we are moving back up North, while not right next to door to them, but a 2 hour drive away.
You cannot replace family, especially in your Senior years.
Ten years ago my husband in his 50's was out of work in NY for over a year. He took the first job offered to him which was in Florida. Our children/grandkids still live in NY. Have any idea how much $$$ we have spent going back an forth to see them?
After his heart attack last year, it was time to think over the situation. Our kids were scrambling to get to Florida before Dad died. He is retiring in the Spring and we are moving back up North, while not right next to door to them, but a 2 hour drive away.
You cannot replace family, especially in your Senior years.
I agree. Family is irreplaceable and doesn't last forever. I am appalled at some of the comments and suggestions in this thread. Once a year to see family is a JOKE. Even twice a year is a JOKE. I am sorry, but I would like to see them at least 4-6 times per year. It has nothing to do with "growing up." It has everything to do with the fact that family does not last forever and once a year is totally absurd. That means I would only see them about 30 more times before they're dead, or even less.
How old are you? Relatives in their 50's (and shockingly getting older!) aren't old at all....grandparents in their 80 are more understandable. A 10 hour drive is not fantastic but not outrageous either - you could split that in half and stay at a cheap hotel overnight - for a couple trips a year, anyway. Or find someone to "carpool" with on some of your trips. Get your family to come to see you at least once a year. There - you've accounted for the entire year!
But seriously, you may need to grow up a bit - lots of people see family once or twice a year - if it's a big deal, switch jobs! Btw - how do you even have that much vacation time? Obviously if you can only do weekend trips even flying is not practical...why did you move there in the first place?
I'm guessing they're in their 20s or early 30s. Now if I was able at over 50 to drive across the country from FL back home to CA by myself, they can drive from OH to CT. Yes, I had to get out and stretch and stop more often than I did the last time I drove across country(in my 20s) but I did it and I did it alone.
I hear a lot of whining on here. The only job they could get was in OH? Find that hard to believe. Even if it is true that in their part of CT there was no job equivalent, you have NY, RI, VT, MA....couldn't find anything in those states either? You know "border states".
Than can take the time to go visit and than complains about having to use their guest room or bathroom? Than stay in a motel, or is that a complaint also.
Please. Be thankful that your trip can at least be done by car in less than a day, some people have family that to see them requires a long/expensive plane trip. And they go for YEARS without seeing each other.
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. Yes, I had to get out and stretch and stop more often than I did the last time I drove across country(in my 20s) but I did it and I did it alone. 
