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So, my best friend from college (who happens to be the opposite gender, and was almost a romantic interest, but that's another thing and also very over) is getting married soon, and I'm very excited for her. The weird issue is that she's scheduled the date on my birthday. Now, we're close enough friends that she didn't do it on purpose, but the date is set and I'll likely be part of the ceremony in some way. And it isn't an issue for me, because "it's just a day", but when she told me about it, I involuntarily hesitated. Which probably came off weird. But I didn't say anything because I didn't want it to be a big deal, especially since the date has already been set.
I'm just curious what your opinions on the situation are. Should I bring it up casually (knowing that she'd feel really bad about it) or just let it slide?
Seriously? Your best friend should feel badly for scheduling her wedding on your birthday?
NO, you should not bring it up. You might want to consider growing up instead. There is no reason why any birthday celebration of yours can't be postponed a couple of days.
You do realize that it is a heck of a lot harder to get all the necessary ducks in a row for a wedding, don't you?
Woah ok, let me clear something up really quick. My plan was to say nothing. I was just curious what others thought.
And as far as I'm concerned, my only error is was the involuntary pause when she told me. Even though it was merely a side effect of "hey that date'll be easy to remember!" and "I hope I can make it home then". But may have come across as hesitation.
Don't be too hard on the OP. I remember my birthday being much more important when I was younger. I was a little pouty (not outwardly) once in my early twenties when I had to spend my birthday at the funeral of someone I had only met once. I was so used to the day being all about me. Of course, this changes with age.
So, my best friend from college (who happens to be the opposite gender, and was almost a romantic interest, but that's another thing and also very over) is getting married soon, and I'm very excited for her. The weird issue is that she's scheduled the date on my birthday. Now, we're close enough friends that she didn't do it on purpose, but the date is set and I'll likely be part of the ceremony in some way. And it isn't an issue for me, because "it's just a day", but when she told me about it, I involuntarily hesitated. Which probably came off weird. But I didn't say anything because I didn't want it to be a big deal, especially since the date has already been set.
I'm just curious what your opinions on the situation are. Should I bring it up casually (knowing that she'd feel really bad about it) or just let it slide?
Tell her you forgive her for the scheduling gaffe and suggest she put birthday candles on the groom's cake for you. That will take care of the situation.
Let it go. You may feel a little self-conscious but don't say anything. If she finds out, just laugh and tell her not to worry about it. My birthday is on Halloween and I have kids, so there is ALWAYS something else going on that day. Your friend will have a million things on her mind; don't add to her stress by making her worry about hurting your feelings. It wasn't personal, and like you said, she doesn't even know it's the same day. Finding the right day is tough anyway. Let it go.
And why would she feel bad, if you're so close that you might be part of the wedding?
Dude. She's moved on. You need to back off.
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