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OP - you seem to have a huge amount of superiority complex. I've attended quite a few college graduations and most of them were thrown by the parents. There isnt one way of doing things. In some of them, the graduate hung out with their friends, in others, everyone mixed. However one thing they did have in common is that most people were happy to be there.
You didnt have to attend this party. And even if you attended thinking it would fit your view of what a graduation party should be like and got there and realized it was "sub-par", why did you stay. You should have given your excuses and left immediately. Life is too short. Instead you come here and complain and tell us about your self sustaining lifestyle with 10s of thousands of $$. Good on you!
Ultimately, you sound like you and your friend are at very different places in your lives right now and you also dont sound like you like each other much. That's totally fine. Friends do grow apart and do yourself a favor and find friends that are more fitting to your idea of "normal". You truly would be happier that way.
No. It's like being forced to sit at the children's table during Thanksgiving despite not being a child. Then again, most of this is my fault. If I go to a party someone's parents are hosting, I can't expect much.
Why are you blaming the parents for your friend having immature friends?
Why do you expect all people of the same age to act the same? Why would you expect a brand new graduate to have the same life experiences and maturity level of someone who already graduated and has been working for a year?
Why are you friends with such immature people?
Why are you so judgmental towards your friend's parents, but not as bothered by your friend's behavior and the behavior of his other guests? Do you think it's related to the emotional coldness you experienced in your own family? Perhaps on some level youre jealous these new grads get to be "kids" a little longer?
No. It's like being forced to sit at the children's table during Thanksgiving despite not being a child. Then again, most of this is my fault. If I go to a party someone's parents are hosting, I can't expect much.
Well, in my family, you sit at the kids table until you're married with a kid. There are 38 year olds at my family's parties that sit at the kiddie table, despite having advanced degrees and real professional successes.
Also, a graduation party isn't uncommon for a college grad. I didn't get one at highschool (you're supposed to graduate high school, everyone else in the family did) but did at college.
I'm sorry you feel resentful for how your friend acted, but that is between his parents and him, and when people are 22 and have a basement full of free beer and their friends around, and no job to go to in the AM.
You know people who are expected to work at 1,2 ,or 3 am and are still expected to be in at 7?
Yes...Consulting, Law at a big time law firm where Jr. Associates struggle to make partner, to name a few. Junior Bankers (investment bankers) often talk about "The magic roundabout" where they leave the cab waiting at their door while they shower and change at 6:00 AM...
Yes your friend and his other friends were acting pretty immature and missing a great opportunity to network. You sound like a grounded, responsible person and that's great. It was rude of the younger people to exclude themselves from the hosts (the parents) and stupid of them because they might have made some great employment contacts if they had mingled with the adults. The truth is they probably would h,ave sat in a corner with their face in a phone anyway.
As for throwing grad parties, I guess it depends on the family. I got squat for my HS graduation, and never had a college graduation, but I've been to many college graduation parties. While the kids and adults usually mingle a little, it's common for the generations to drift to their own kind. If, however, the graduate left the party area, they would have been in trouble with the parents.
No. It's like being forced to sit at the children's table during Thanksgiving despite not being a child. Then again, most of this is my fault. If I go to a party someone's parents are hosting, I can't expect much.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JONOV
Well, in my family, you sit at the kids table until you're married with a kid. There are 38 year olds at my family's parties that sit at the kiddie table, despite having advanced degrees and real professional successes.
Families are different. My family never has a "kids table" at holiday celebrations. However, if we are using good china & crystal the preschool & young elementary age children get unbreakable plates & glasses.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JONOV
Also, a graduation party isn't uncommon for a college grad. I didn't get one at highschool (you're supposed to graduate high school, everyone else in the family did) but did at college.
My extended family is the same way. We never give high school graduation parties because everyone is expected to graduate from HS. It would be like giving a huge party to celebrate "graduating" from kindergarten or middle school. But, we often give a family graduation party when someone graduates from college or graduate school.
No one "knows it all" more than a 22-year old, new to the adult world with their first taste of an adult income, in an entry-level job....
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