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It really doesn't matter about their age or what might be the reason. They didn't have the common decency to let you know they weren't coming, until your husband contacted them.
Bottom line they had no intention of coming, they were cooking their own food when your husband contacted. Just them saying that shows how clueless and rude they are. If they changed their mind about coming, you call up and use the "not feeling well" card.
Screw them. I wouldn't bother again and if you live in an small enough area where you may run into them I would say hello and keep walking.
You will find other couples to befriend, ones who have some manners.
I totally agree. That was my feeling too that regardless of what the reason or excuse & regardless of their ages, they still could have called you instead of making it so you had to call them in order to find out why they hadn't come yet.
The not-even-bothering-to-call is quite possibly worse than the actual cancelling at the last minute. Those people are very low-class.
I totally agree. That was my feeling too that regardless of what the reason or excuse & regardless of their ages, they still could have called you instead of making it so you had to call them in order to find out why they hadn't come yet.
The not-even-bothering-to-call is quite possibly worse than the actual cancelling at the last minute. Those people are very low-class.
Oh, it's much worse than cancelling at the last minute. If they had done that you give them another chance.
But not with what they pulled. They had no intention of going and could have cared less what efforts the OP and her husband went through.
The most bizarre part of this incident, to me, is them saying they're just finishing cooking their food and probably won't want to go anywhere else after that! Hello?? Why were they cooking for themselves?
Sounds psychotic or drunk to me. How could they both be this clueless or rude? I suspect they are a highly dysfunctional couple. I also think they didn't know they were your only guests, not that it makes them any less inconsiderate.
I don't think you were as familiar with them as you thought you were. They probably saw you as "too nice" to say "no thanks."
New town, new place, new people...count on laying low for 6 - 12 months. Don't take it personally. Maybe they just didn't feel like it.
This post is full of all kinds of wrong. They thought that they were "too nice" to say not thanks to???? That is probably one of the silliest things I've read on this forum. LOL, just factually silly.
Maybe they just didn't feel like it??? So... people can just be completely rude because they don't feel like using basic manners and basic common decency to treat people with simple and basic respect. Man.... I'm a easy going guy and don't get upset that easily and am really not that uptight overall, but manners and basic repect for people has declined in the last 20 plus years. I wouldn't in my life pull this crap on this couple that the other couple has.
if you don't wanna go, you simply let them know way ahead of time, you don't pull the crap that they pulled in what the OP said.
LOL... ..you people are amazing in how you conduct yourselves. Same mentality as the safe space crowd and therapy dogs because your guy didn't win. JEEZUS... everyone gets a trophy and we don't keep score because that upsets our little feelers when we don't win.
Teach your kids Mandarin people because we ain't "winning" anymore.....
I don't think you were as familiar with them as you thought you were. They probably saw you as "too nice" to say "no thanks."
New town, new place, new people...count on laying low for 6 - 12 months. Don't take it personally. Maybe they just didn't feel like it.
I have seen some ridiculous comments on CD, but I think you win.
What does being "too nice" have to do with anything. If they thought they were "too nice" than call up the nice people and say "we can't make it", you don't leave them hanging
Lay low? They're not on the lam from the FBI or Tony Soprano....geez.
Years ago my husband and I were close friends of a couple who constantly cancelled at the last minute after we had gotten babysitters and were looking forward to going out. Because they were close friends we kept trying. But after the 4th or 5th time we stopped making any plans with them. They were not happy with us and couldn't imagine how their constant canceling was a problem for us. Sheeze. So rude and inconsiderate of others. Who needs friends like that?
I am just amazed at people's lack of common courtesy these days. You get invited to someone's house for Thanksgiving and you accept there better be a damn good reason why you don't show up or even have the decency to call. I'm sorry but I would never speak to this couple again and if they call you I would politely tell them how you feel about their lack of manners.
I would just like to say that I personally would have found your invite a little off putting. Not bad, but it just seems a little weird to go from hanging out once to spending Thanksgiving together.
This may have sent off my spidey senses. The extra contact would be weird to me.
I know you meant well but I think this is a high pressure move. That does not mean they do not like you but maybe not Thanksgiving like you (yet)?
Also were they clear they would be the only ones? Nothing sucks worse than showing up for a holiday where everyone knows each other and you only know the hosts. That is not an hour commitment....it is like a 3 hour plus commitment.
I agree. IMO, Thanksgiving is for family or close friends and people that you know well. If it were just the OP, her husband, and this couple, that sounds odd considering that she just met them.
That being said if the couple felt that way they should have just said no.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Forever Blue
Horrible on that couple's part!
Firstly, you had to keep asking them if they're coming because they don't have the consideration to keep you informed AS SOON AHEAD AS POSSIBLE. If they just decided to cook & stay at home, they must have known at the very, very least I'd say Thanksgiving morning or even the day before Thanksgiving. So why they couldn't just tell you, I'll never know.
To quote Judge Judy, 'That should have been OP's first clue." The fact that she had to keep asking should have sent up a red flag. The couple obviously wasn't interested.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CatHerder
Huh? What does "turned off by the contact" mean? My friends and I confirm dates and times for get-togethers all the time, both as reminders and because stuff can come up.
Why wouldn't the OP want to confirm that their guests were coming, especially since they were going to the trouble of cooking extra food?
It means what it says. If someone you just met asks you for Thanksgiving dinner, you wouldn't find that odd. And the OP and this couple aren't 'friends' - not yet. The OP kept asking, which seems needy to me.
Confirming means asking once. If you have to keep asking the answer is obvious.
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