Too many surprise guests to family Thanksgiving (cousins, college, neighbors)
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Bottomline is that I just want an uneventful dinner and go home safely I felt that I was constantly trying to avoid eye contact or conversation with the wrong people while my family expects me to keep the guests company. I think I rather change shoes with my mother and prepare the food than find something to talk about with some guests that don't have the opportunity or privilege we've obtained.
You are the epitome of [insert ethnicity] privilege. Not your family, they sound wonderful. Just you.
Do everyone in your family a favor and stop going. Don't bother hosting; I doubt anyone would show.
Last edited by convextech; 11-30-2016 at 03:22 PM..
Yeah, don't want any of that durn multiculturalism!! I mean really. Someone could ask for the hot sauce or something. BTW, shouldn't only white people be able to celebrate Thanksgiving? I mean they were the ones that started it for gosh sakes. I mean the American Indians can if they want............. but they probably learned the first time.
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Haha, I wish I could but that would be like profiling people. All I really wish is to have a peaceful and quiet dinner with the family and not have to open our family to strangers all the time and participate in some multiculturalism agenda that my sister likes to do.
"Participate in some multiculturalism agenda"? You mean interact with non-whites?
Anyway, I just remembered you as the poster shocked that teenaged girls were wearing bathing suits at the beach, so your rant about Thanksgiving dinner with non-whites seems about right for you.
Sure, that was exactly what I am trying to avoid but it's evidently clear that we're well to do and the people that were invited aren't as successful as we are and may view us as being snobby and entitled. We're not on even grounds here.
Bottomline is that I just want an uneventful dinner and go home safely I felt that I was constantly trying to avoid eye contact or conversation with the wrong people while my family expects me to keep the guests company. I think I rather change shoes with my mother and prepare the food than find something to talk about with some guests that don't have the opportunity or privilege we've obtained.
LOL, don't you mean "go to the mall and be shocked that people are eating in the food court? You really get rattled very easily!
In a way, this is the classic CD Relationships thread. The normal pattern is as follows:
1) OP comes up with a complaint or problem that is way beyond the realm of normal behavior, only is too neurotic or lacks the self-awareness to realize it.
2) Everybody else with a lick of common sense piles on and tells the OP how dumb or how big a brat he or she is being.
3) OP, shocked that nobody is taking his or her side, decides to embellish his or her original post in hopes that new evidence (Real or ginned up whole cloth) will justify the original post.
4) Everybody else with a lick of common sense finds even more things to find fault with, piling on further. Analysis of the OP's posts reaches almost Talmudic levels of hair-splitting. Postgraduate deconstruction seminars finally come in handy.
5) Finally, a misguided somebody who didn't carefully read the OP carefully from the beginning, chimes in as a sympathetic voice.
6) Everybody piles on the second person. Terms such as 'quisling' and 'noxious halfwit' would be used freely if not for fear of TOS violations.
7) Another person entirely brings up their own anecdote, only tangentially related to the OP's.
8) That third person is pelted with rocks and garbage.
9) Somebody says something funny. Two or three more people, tired of rehashing the OP's problem ad nauseam, riff on the joke.
10) Some officious room monitor demands we stay on topic despite the vein being exhausted.
My wife has told me to just bear with it instead of speaking out against it, my parents are very laid back so they don't really care it. But after so many years I am ready to just tell my parents that I will do a belated dinner with them.
Anyone else in my shoes?
Well, yeah, I have to go with the consensus. It doesn't bother your parents, so don't let it stress YOU.
Maybe have your parents at YOUR house for one year for a change?
I do understand your feelings, though. One year my husband got a wild hare and decided to have all his siblings over for TG. What ensued is that some of them brought their families, and one brought a girlfriend, and a friend showed up with his sister, her friend, and the mother at the door. House was crammed way beyond comfort and it was very stressful. We were both pissed off that siblings just assumed it was okay to drag others with them, although I'm the one who expected problems. He's never wanted to do it since.
In a way, this is the classic CD Relationships thread. The normal pattern is as follows:
1) OP comes up with a complaint or problem that is way beyond the realm of normal behavior, only is too neurotic or lacks the self-awareness to realize it.
2) Everybody else with a lick of common sense piles on and tells the OP how dumb or how big a brat he or she is being.
3) OP, shocked that nobody is taking his or her side, decides to embellish his or her original post in hopes that new evidence (Real or ginned up whole cloth) will justify the original post.
4) Everybody else with a lick of common sense finds even more things to find fault with, piling on further. Analysis of the OP's posts reaches almost Talmudic levels of hair-splitting. Postgraduate deconstruction seminars finally come in handy.
5) Finally, a misguided somebody who didn't carefully read the OP carefully from the beginning, chimes in as a sympathetic voice.
6) Everybody piles on the second person. Terms such as 'quisling' and 'noxious halfwit' would be used freely if not for fear of TOS violations.
7) Another person entirely brings up their own anecdote, only tangentially related to the OP's.
8) That third person is pelted with rocks and garbage.
9) Somebody says something funny. Two or three more people, tired of rehashing the OP's problem ad nauseam, riff on the joke.
10) Some officious room monitor demands we stay on topic despite the vein being exhausted.
11) Thread gets shut down.
You win the internet.
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Many people feel Thanksgiving is an ideal time to be charitable and include friends, co-workers, etc., that might not have a family gathering they can get to. Many people feel that is well within the spirit of the holiday and that it is not just a family affair. If you want it to be a family affair, then I suggest you host your own and restrict who can come. If you're one of the guests then you have zero input into who else is there.
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