Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I told my wife that I loath going to Thanksgiving at my parents the last few years because one of my sibling has a habit of inviting people with various backgrounds to our family dinner.
One of my siblings close friend has been single for all her life and always brings along a different guy or more people along each year. I always felt she's the freeloading types and never comes over unless there's something in it for her. She's been through a rainbow of different types of guys and each year the selection has been getting worse imo. That's not me to judge but for my family dinner it is special since I don't see my parents for more than 3x a year I hate having my dinner with guests that don't intertwine well with our family and causes friction because I can't openly talk family or personal issues when there are guests around.
The reason I don't invite a friend to Thanksgiving dinner because I believe it should be exclusive to relatives only and I'm already having a tug-o-war with both side of my families and there are plenty of relatives that I haven't seen for awhile that I should spend time with than other people.
My wife has told me to just bear with it instead of speaking out against it, my parents are very laid back so they don't really care it. But after so many years I am ready to just tell my parents that I will do a belated dinner with them.
Anyone else in my shoes?
I haven't read any of the responses. But, I think your solution is perfect. Just don't go, if you hate it. And have dinner with your folks and relatives in a setting where it's just you and them.
No need to be mean about it, but just say it's not fun for you when you have to deal with sister's weirdo friends, and rather than bring tension into the situation, you'll just do your own family Thanksgiving and visit with your folks when the weirdos aren't around.
That's quite fair and adult. It's really on your parents then to decide if they want to put rules on your sister's guests or not. But, you have the right to not want to put up with it, just because your parents do. Or because nobody wants to confront your sister.
Status:
"It's WARY, or LEERY (weary means tired)"
(set 3 days ago)
Location: A Yankee in northeast TN
16,092 posts, read 21,222,224 times
Reputation: 43682
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cantabridgienne
"Participate in some multiculturalism agenda"? You mean interact with non-whites?
Anyway, I just remembered you as the poster shocked that teenaged girls were wearing bathing suits at the beach, so your rant about Thanksgiving dinner with non-whites seems about right for you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl
I wonder what the OP thinks of people who set a place for Baby Jesus at Christmas dinner. Don't forget, he was a Nazarene and probably brown.
Don't be hasty, from the way the OP uses words in his posts I would guess that either English isn't his first language, or perhaps he's not as educated as all that, in spite of being 'privileged'.
I'm going with ESL. (Or maybe his keyboard skills are even more atrocious than my own!?)
I'd do the belated dinner. I should consider something like that with my dad and step mom. The last three years they've been inviting some trashy friends over on holidays.
I suspect the thread has not turned out the way the OP originally anticipated it would.
I beg to differ, I came here with an open mind. Like I said, I've been loathing it for the past few years. All I ask for is a warm and cozy family dinner and nothing more or less. I did take my own family out to dinner on Sunday, sort of a make up dinner for me since I didn't feel comfortable at the Thanksgiving dinner constantly greeting people and trying hard to avoid conversations that always leads to an expectations of sort.
The next holiday dinner will come up and this time I have to decide once again, my family usually invites those with children to join us for X-mas and there will be a different set of issues of course.
My oldest son has started to complain about kids who were less privileged than he is and I have to straighten him out.
I haven't read any of the responses. But, I think your solution is perfect. Just don't go, if you hate it. And have dinner with your folks and relatives in a setting where it's just you and them.
No need to be mean about it, but just say it's not fun for you when you have to deal with sister's weirdo friends, and rather than bring tension into the situation, you'll just do your own family Thanksgiving and visit with your folks when the weirdos aren't around.
That's quite fair and adult. It's really on your parents then to decide if they want to put rules on your sister's guests or not. But, you have the right to not want to put up with it, just because your parents do. Or because nobody wants to confront your sister.
To be perfectly honest, I did speak to my father about it and he does have a lot to say but he is respectful of people of all different backgrounds and more importantly he is happy that our family has expanded so much. Our dinner included people with origins from every continent.
I beg to differ, I came here with an open mind. Like I said, I've been loathing it for the past few years. All I ask for is a warm and cozy family dinner and nothing more or less. I did take my own family out to dinner on Sunday, sort of a make up dinner for me since I didn't feel comfortable at the Thanksgiving dinner constantly greeting people and trying hard to avoid conversations that always leads to an expectations of sort.
The next holiday dinner will come up and this time I have to decide once again, my family usually invites those with children to join us for X-mas and there will be a different set of issues of course.
My oldest son has started to complain about kids who were less privileged than he is and I have to straighten him out.
Hahahaha! So this whole thread has been a joke on us, is that it?
If not, then how in the world could you possibly straighten out your son who is just like you? For a while I thought you were for real, a jerk maybe, but at least being honest. Now I see...it's all just fun and games.
I beg to differ, I came here with an open mind. Like I said, I've been loathing it for the past few years. All I ask for is a warm and cozy family dinner and nothing more or less. I did take my own family out to dinner on Sunday, sort of a make up dinner for me since I didn't feel comfortable at the Thanksgiving dinner constantly greeting people and trying hard to avoid conversations that always leads to an expectations of sort.
The next holiday dinner will come up and this time I have to decide once again, my family usually invites those with children to join us for X-mas and there will be a different set of issues of course.
My oldest son has started to complain about kids who were less privileged than he is and I have to straighten him out.
I beg to say you're full of it.
Are you of Indian (Asian) heritage by any chance? Or Korean?
I'm just curious to know how the OP knows the net worth of the people who come to Thanksgiving dinner. Are they wearing signs saying 'I only have $50 in the bank" or "multimillionaire'? For all the OP knows, some of the family guests could have a higher net worth than his family. OP, why don't you just enjoy the day, meeting new people and leaving the heavy family talk for another day? Maybe your family doesn't want to discuss family matters at the Thanksgiving table. If you have family matters that you would like to discuss, pick another day to do that.
Also, just because you/your family are well off now doesn't mean that you will always be. In case your fortunes ever get reversed, would you like other people to think/talk about you in the same way as you do these family guests?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
