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Alas, I lack the chutzpah to respond quite so frankly.
I did tell her I was a long-time collector, had taken a very close look at the antique in question, and was on the board of a local museum with a large collection of these items. But judging by her other comments, that may have escalated her response.
Oh, well - I walked away, never have to see her again - and meanwhile, the antique in question is gracing my home very nicely.
Location: When things get hot they expand. Im not fat. Im hot.
2,520 posts, read 6,327,828 times
Reputation: 5332
Quote:
Originally Posted by cvgaskill
I try to be pleasant to all, but there is this one lady that is getting under my skin. We have several acquaintances in common and there are often social gatherings with these other couples that I am not included. She always makes it known that she was invited (but I was not). I don't know how to respond to her constant needling that I am not part of the "in-crowd". I have been holding my tongue and acting like I do not care, but honestly it is starting to wear on me. There is no way to avoid these people and I live in a small town and frankly I don't want her to think she has influenced me.
My question is: what would be a good come back to stop her from being so nasty? I am always at a loss for words when she starts her harping. Thanks
Quote:
Originally Posted by cvgaskill
Yes, that is EXACTLY what she says. And then she proceeds to describe in detail what she did at the party and what a GREAT time everyone had.
Actually I have been really busy getting ready for the Texas Renaissance Festival and haven't been out of the house or even checked this forum. Some of the replies really had me rolling on the floor. Unfortunately I cannot avoid this woman forever. I will see her tomorrow and will be armed and ready. I so appreciate all the fantastic replys .
You don't need a snappy comeback. I have learned that getting into a pizzing match with someone you cant avoid just makes things uncomfortable for you and everyone else. Sure you can put her in her place. But now every time you run into her she will give you the stink eye. Any group setting will be very strained. And those acquaintances are going to have to choose sides cause if youre coming then shes not coming.
Youre giving her way too much importance. Everybody doesn't get invited to everything. I would feel sorry for her. You need to see her for what she is a very sad and insecure person. She needs to feel superior to feel good about herself. So let her. You know the truth.
The best way to handle people like that is with extreme niceness. Always look for the positive. Refuse to see any negatives. I will admit that sometimes this is hard. But if you choose to be in a good mood life is a lot more pleasant. And. As a bonus it pizzes nasty people off when you don't acknowledge their shenanigans.
So when she described in detail what she did at the party and what a GREAT time everyone had this is what she would have gotten from me. Oh my that sounds wonderful. Sounds you had a great time. I have been SO busy getting ready for the Renaissance Festival. Ill be glad when it gets here so I can take a breath. It will be here before you know it. Make sure you pencil it in on your calendar. See what I did there. That's nice for you. I don't care I wasn't invited. I have my own fun stuff.
"Why do you feel this matters enough to share with me?"
This is a well-nigh perfect response. Because it says a) that her opinion doesn't matter to you one whit and b) that there is likely a character flaw in her to bring it up. The key to dealing with people like that is to not be rude but rather to throw them off center so they'll find easier target.
My wife has a 'friend' like that. She has an inferiority complex, so she likes to make cutting remarks about others. Last year at a wedding for a mutual friend's daughter, I wore kind of a vivid green checked shirt. Sitting at the table with this woman and several others, she said, "That shirt makes you look like a leprechaun." So without missing a beat, I replied in an Irish lilt, "Faith and begorrah, ascribe to me leprachaun qualities again, and I'll be forced to bop you with my shillelagh, don't you know?" And then went right back to my conversation.
"What's a shilelagh?"
"Oh, me lady, look at the state o'you. Don't even know that, do you?"
She shut up after that. She's nothing but civil to me since then. I was thanked by several that night for putting Connie in her place.
I'm a bit cheeky so when she does it in company of others, I'd ask her something like 'How's that persistent little infection?' or 'How're you going with that bed bug infestation?'
When she says she has no idea what you're saying, say 'Oops sorry, I wouldn't want others to know either. Mums the word' Lol
Again, just give her the long side-eye, <bleep> look & move on...
People look ridiculous when they attempt witty comebacks...everyone then knows you're bothered by it.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 12-28-2017 at 01:16 PM..
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