He Assumed I Spoke "Asian" Because Of My Race! (males, person)
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Because it just can't be possible for an Asian in CA to have both parents and grand-parents born in CA, the parents also not able to speak any Asian language. In a place & time where there are PLENTY like this.
Why am I NOT surprised "I do not really understand" has crossed your mind before?
Or maybe the assumption is that you can speak another language because you appear to look Asian.
You can choose to see the worst in others, or choose to see the best in others. The choice is your to make for your own emotional well being. No?
This is a sensitive subject because it is about race and ethnicity. But think of it this way, I say "Thank you for your service" to veterans because I "thought" it was a nice gesture. To me, it is also a conversation starter. Some veterans are offended by it because they don't want to hear it., so now, I just won't say anything to people I don't personally know. It is impossible to please everybody because everybody has different "triggers". Nobody knows what we say or do can rub somebody the wrong way.
I am mixed myself (German, Japanese and I spent several years in China so I can also speak Chinese) and there are a lot of people assume I can speak multiple languages. I do. Maybe when I was younger, speaking another language in public seems "uncool" to me, but now I am older, I am proud that I can speak another language. when I changed the perception about MYSELF, I changed the perception about others. Just another thought.
Just another day, I saw an elderly Asian woman in the mall and she seemed "lost". I asked her if she needed help in English first, she seemed "lost", so I asked her in Chinese and then in Japanese, she acted like she just found a savior. When I was younger, I probably would hide the fact that I can speak both languages, but now I am glad that I did. I can speak German as well, and I would treat a white person exactly the same depends on the situation.
You held the door for a stranger, maybe he thought only the Asians from Asian countries can be this nice. This is another thought. Who knows?
Last edited by lilyflower3191981; 11-29-2018 at 01:22 PM..
People have been asking me my ethnicity or trying to guess my country of origin my entire life (I get a wide variety of guesses) and I consider myself white. I assume it is because of my pale skin and nearly black extra-thick hair. Or because I am half-Jewish, look fairly Jewish, and some people are anti-semites so wish to categorize me.
I don't waste any energy worrying about why they ask. People are just curious and a lot of people are also ignorant. I save my outrage for actually insulting comments like the neanderthal that recently made a loud unfunny Jewish joke for everybody to hear in a long Costco line.
I am mixed myself (German, Japanese and I spent several years in China so I can also speak Chinese) and there are a lot of people assume I can speak multiple languages. I do. Maybe when I was younger, speaking another language in public seems "uncool" to me, but now I am older, I am proud that I can speak another language. when I changed the perception about MYSELF, I changed the perception about others. Just another thought.
That's great & advantageous you are multi-lingual.
Deep down I really do wish I had that ability too, I'd never consider it "uncool" to speak another language in public if it doesn't cause disruption, that line of thought seems flawed
That's great & advantageous you are multi-lingual.
Deep down I really do wish I had that ability too, I'd never consider it "uncool" to speak another language in public if it doesn't cause disruption, that line of thought seems flawed
well, the line of thought certainly is flawed. But a lot of people DO feel this way especially when they were YOUNGER.
Bottom line, you are the one who is offended, and you need to figure out the reason why.
I am only saying maybe he thought (assumed) you could speak another language which is awesome, so he wanted to start a conversation with you. Maybe he thought you were nice, and only the Asians from Asian country can be nice (another assumption)
You can think the worst of others, or you can think the best of others. The choice is yours to make.
Happiness Hack: Stop Assuming The Worst In Others
If you only want your feeling to be validated, then fine.
I was just yesterday in supermarket and saleslady talk to me in English! Maybe because I am caucasian, but English is not even my second language! Did she made a racist comment?
I would expected better from Wholefoods, maybe next time they could speak Swedish at least without assuming anything?
Should I start a GoFundMe or just report to police?
Westerners in general have a very difficult understanding of Asian cultures so there's no use being offended or get worked up. The funny thing is that Asian women that are interested in dating outside of their race are not amused or interested by someone who speaks their dialect. A traditional chinese or korean woman is not interested in a white man trying to speak their language.
I have to agree with OP. If I landed in Japan, I would be incredibly insulted if someone assumed I spoke English and actually (gasp!) tried to speak to me in that language.
OK. You don't think there are a ton of gay white men into Asians? You clearly haven't traveled to south east Asia
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be possible for an Asian in CA to have both parents and grand-parents born in CA, the parents also not able to speak any Asian language. In a place & time where there are PLENTY like this. 
