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What gets me is that people think that this area is the only place with good schools and good jobs. And it's not. There are many other places in the country that have both of them without losing any of the other cultural amenities we have here.
Yes, we earn more money here on average, but with the high COL, we are not coming out ahead. All of our money goes to housing, daycare, etc. Meanwhile we are not enjoying our lives with the stress of life, work, and commute here. Not having the family support here to help either. We may even shorten our lives by living here. The point is, what kind of life is it that we are leading here?
In other parts of the world, it can be unheard of for families to live in different parts of the city, let alone opposites sides of a large country such as the US. And here we are without grandparents to help babysit the kids, grandparents only getting to see their grandkids a handful of times per year, etc. It's unheard of in so many other cultures.
It's time for Americans to stop working so damn hard and so much and get back to what is truly important.
I don't see people who actually live here and post on C-D claiming very often that this area is the only place with good schools and good jobs. But the fact that people keep arriving from all over the country (and the world) tends to suggest that they've concluded that the opportunities here are greater than the places they are leaving behind.
Are they wrong? I don't know. I think this area ends up being a place where a lot of people are forced to come to terms with the fact that they may not have the standard of living that they'd anticipated when they were younger. You can move back to another place with a lower cost of living, but then you still run the risk that you're not making enough money to make ends meet. That might be a good strategy for some people, and not for others. Some people bounce back and forth between this area and other areas.
It is, however, statistically unlikely that you are shortening your life by living in this area. The New York Times just compiled an index of the healthiest and most thriving areas of the country, looking at factors such as life expectancy, obesity rates, incomes, unemployment rate and the like, and Arlington, Fairfax and Loudoun Counties were ranked #2, #3 and #4 in the nation, after Los Alamos, New Mexico, out of over 3000 jurisdictions evaluated. So, if you stick around, you may be unhappy, but you'll also have more time to reflect on your misery.
I wish you much success in your move! It sounds like you are doing it for the right reasons. And I understand where you are coming from. My parents are getting older (aren't we all?), and I hate being so far away from them and the rest of the family. Anyway, good luck with your house sale and move!
Ditto on the congratulations/best wishes. We almost moved to the Hampton Roads area (Fort Monroe) from NoVa when I was a teenager, but my parents' plans changed.
We don't have one place where family is. And after our 17 year old finishes high school we will leave this area and move to Hawaii or Florida. I work from home and am tired of Virginia and ready to go.
I'm tiring of the DC area, mainly because of traffic and weather, and am looking towards the west coast. I know the job market isn't great, but I'm fairly confident I could bring my salary there in my field.
Thanks for the well wishes I will say the HR area is quite difficult to transition to, at least from NOVA. The COL is lower than here, but the salaries paid in many fields are disproportionately lower than the COL adjustment. Here, I thought it would be hard to move into the DC area because of the high COL, but moving FROM the DC area where the high salaries are at least more on par with the high COL to an area where the salaries are much lower is pretty scary!
One thing to consider is, will you get the kind of relationships you want if you actually move? I've seen all sorts of family dynamics. Some grandparents aren't really interested in seeing their grandchildren much despite living nearby. Some are quite controlling and try to take over the child-rearing and undermine that parents. Sometimes the cousins are not really the type you want influencing your children (dropouts, drug use, etc.). Some grandparents play favorites among the grandchildren.
I have friends who live in an economically depressed area. For several years they've lived on food stamps and, despite determined frugality, have been burning through their college and retirement savings while working only sporadic and temporary jobs, all because when they lost jobs, they refused to consider jobs that would require moving away from extended family. By the time they realized, several years in, that good jobs just aren't going to materialize in their area, it became harder to compete elsewhere because of the big gaps in their resumes.
Sorry to sound so negative. I also know many people who chose to stay where their families are, or move to where their families are, and would happily tell you it was a great decision. Being realistic is important, is all.
I don't see people who actually live here and post on C-D claiming very often that this area is the only place with good schools and good jobs. But the fact that people keep arriving from all over the country (and the world) tends to suggest that they've concluded that the opportunities here are greater than the places they are leaving behind.
Are they wrong? I don't know. I think this area ends up being a place where a lot of people are forced to come to terms with the fact that they may not have the standard of living that they'd anticipated when they were younger. You can move back to another place with a lower cost of living, but then you still run the risk that you're not making enough money to make ends meet. That might be a good strategy for some people, and not for others. Some people bounce back and forth between this area and other areas.
I think you hit the nail on the head with the above. It's interesting talking to those I grew up in the N. VA area. Our parents were able to buy housing back in the 70's and 80's at such a low cost, as they were new housing areas at the time and now the same houses are selling for well over 500k and 600k. Our generation in this area saw our parents able to buy these housing in now highly desirable locations on entry government level salaries in the day, and it's very disappointing to us that our generation, working the same grade level as our parents, cannot afford that very same housing. My dad got more bang for his salary back then...he would not get the same now.
During the government furlough last year, we actually considered departing and moving to other locations. Sure, we can have a 5 bedroom house with a 2 car garage on 1/2 an acre of land, all in great school locations, in quite a number of great locations all over the States. But, neither of us can maintain the same standard of living if we leave our government job in those locations. Certain areas of the US have the same specialized job markets we have here - with the massive federal and military presence (San Antonio are, Denver/Colorado Springs area), but those areas are in the same situation we're in. If I did my same job on the outside, meaning moving to the private sector outside the WDC area, I would have a drop in pay by at least $40,000 year. Many other friends who have retired from the government service who swore they would never come back, I've seen retire as contractors doing almost the same work as before.
We have a specialized work force here, and that is the reason many of us choose to remain here despite all the grumbles. But yes, it is completely a downer to realize that people who bought in the 70's and 80's have more than tripled their housing cost since then and those original middle class/government worker neighbors are still out of our reaches despite earning more than the national average. We hope when the kids are out of daycare, things will ease up though.
Well, having one good job in the family may be better than uncertain employment or the need for both spouses to work two low-paying jobs just to make ends meet.
And I'm pretty sure the "1/2 down at Langley or whatever" kids frequently end up at schools that only the top students from "Podunk" end up attending.
Personally, I'd stay in this area given the circumstances you've described, at least for the time being. There are lots of people who'd like to move from other areas to DC and other places but are stuck in areas with a small employment base where they can't find buyers for their homes at any decent price.
180 kids from Braddock went to Tech my year, 110 to UVA, a couple went to UPenn, 4 to MIT, a few to Ivy's like Brown, Cornell a ton to Georgia Tech and Ohio State and Penn State
I would consider all of those pretty good schools. I am pretty sure in admissions they care about AP course load, test scores, activities, and essay quality before they consider anything remotely close to geographic diversity of the college. In the case of AP course load, I dont think theres anywhere in the state that you can have as many AP courses as in NOVA which is really why so many kids go from here to good schools, that and the relative safety of schools in this area towards people who are smart. Its actually one benefit of larger schools in my opinion. I was a bit nerdy as a kid, but I had a lot of friends who were equally nerdy. If i were in a smaller school, I wouldn't have that clique and probably be a lot more ostracized than I was. As it was, I felt very safe and comfortable being myself, doing well, and not having to worry about being cool.
180 kids from Braddock went to Tech my year, 110 to UVA, a couple went to UPenn, 4 to MIT, a few to Ivy's like Brown, Cornell a ton to Georgia Tech and Ohio State and Penn State
I would consider all of those pretty good schools. I am pretty sure in admissions they care about AP course load, test scores, activities, and essay quality before they consider anything remotely close to geographic diversity of the college. In the case of AP course load, I dont think theres anywhere in the state that you can have as many AP courses as in NOVA which is really why so many kids go from here to good schools, that and the relative safety of schools in this area towards people who are smart. Its actually one benefit of larger schools in my opinion. I was a bit nerdy as a kid, but I had a lot of friends who were equally nerdy. If i were in a smaller school, I wouldn't have that clique and probably be a lot more ostracized than I was. As it was, I felt very safe and comfortable being myself, doing well, and not having to worry about being cool.
We also have TJHSST. As much I didn't care for the large high school I attended in the area, I do have to admit the large size made it possible to get lost in different subculture groups within the system. Getting lost in the system was a pro, but it could have easily been a con.
I'd be more interested to know how many of those kids who got accepted to out of state colleges actually got scholarships as well.
180 kids from Braddock went to Tech my year, 110 to UVA, a couple went to UPenn, 4 to MIT, a few to Ivy's like Brown, Cornell a ton to Georgia Tech and Ohio State and Penn State
I would consider all of those pretty good schools. I am pretty sure in admissions they care about AP course load, test scores, activities, and essay quality before they consider anything remotely close to geographic diversity of the college. In the case of AP course load, I dont think theres anywhere in the state that you can have as many AP courses as in NOVA which is really why so many kids go from here to good schools, that and the relative safety of schools in this area towards people who are smart. Its actually one benefit of larger schools in my opinion. I was a bit nerdy as a kid, but I had a lot of friends who were equally nerdy. If i were in a smaller school, I wouldn't have that clique and probably be a lot more ostracized than I was. As it was, I felt very safe and comfortable being myself, doing well, and not having to worry about being cool.
I would be really surprised if Lake Braddock ever had a graduating class where 290 seniors went to U.Va. and Virginia Tech between them. I know LB is big, and perhaps you graduated a while back when it was easier to get into those schools, but those are just huge numbers. My impression is that TJ is the only HS in FCPS that regularly sends over 100 graduates to U.Va.
Sorry to carp, but those numbers took me by surprise. I have no issue with the rest of your post, although I would expect there may be schools in other parts of the state, such as Henrico and Virginia Beach, that offer as many AP or IB courses as NoVa schools.
If I recall from my graduating class back in the day, more of my classmates got accepted to William & Mary over UVA. Quite a number of our top of the class (we had 14 valedictorians, at least) were actually rejected from UVA, but accepted into W&M. Even friends of mine who went to TJHSST, after it became a magnet school, were rejected from UVA despite all their AP classes and credits.
I'm not an expert when it comes to college admission, but N. VA students are really competing against themselves for admission into Tech, UVA, and W&M, our top three.
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I will say the HR area is quite difficult to transition to, at least from NOVA. The COL is lower than here, but the salaries paid in many fields are disproportionately lower than the COL adjustment. Here, I thought it would be hard to move into the DC area because of the high COL, but moving FROM the DC area where the high salaries are at least more on par with the high COL to an area where the salaries are much lower is pretty scary!
