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Dad has repeatedly told him to clean up, the son hasn't, the gf is pissed, he blows her off by sayng it isn't all his mess. He obviously has no more respect for her then the son, she needs to pack up her stuff and leave, or kick them both out if it's her place. And then go find someone who actually cares about her.
Too bad the US does not have a year or two of compulsary Military service like some Europeon Countries. Kids like this could use a few years of strict disipline and motivation to get their butts out of bed every morning.
If he was my son, I'd check on getting him into one of the services. It would do him a world of good and hopefully change him from being the loser he's about to be, to being a man.
If they were my dishes and I were paying for the food that he's eating, that spoiled brat would find his mess dumped on his bed to clean up, and if my boyfriend didn't like it, tough crap.
Dad has repeatedly told him to clean up, the son hasn't, the gf is pissed, he blows her off by sayng it isn't all his mess.He obviously has no more respect for her then the son, she needs to pack up her stuff and leave, or kick them both out if it's her place. And then go find someone who actually cares about her.
It amazes me how parents will defend their kids, it could be from sheer embarrassment, but that response would bother me a bit.
Too bad the US does not have a year or two of compulsary Military service like some Europeon Countries. Kids like this could use a few years of strict disipline and motivation to get their butts out of bed every morning.
If he was my son, I'd check on getting him into one of the services. It would do him a world of good and hopefully change him from being the loser he's about to be, to being a man.
A very wise man I deeply admired once told me the same thing!
He said if we could be more like Israel and require our 18 year olds to all do two years of mandatory service to their country before they did anything else in life we'd be much better off as a country. I believe he, and you, are right
Since there was no discussion about this before the young man moved in, I would tell Dad that we need to talk. Before the talk I would start looking for an a partment to move into. Parents usually can never see where their child is at fault. This happens more with mothers than it does with fathers, but both seem to be blind to the faults of their children. I would tell the dad, if I were the girlfriend that I don't want to be a maid to anyone and that I'm moving out until the college education is finished and the son will no longer be living in that house. No reason for her to raise her voice, just lay down the facts that she won't be used as a doormat or a slave. If I were her, I wouldn't give him an ultimatum, I would just tell him on such and such a date I was moving out.
LOL! Thanks. It's what my mother would have done. Whenever our rooms got to be unbearably messy, she would just dump everything into one huge pile in the middle of the room, and we weren't allowed to go anywhere or do anything until the pile was dismantled. "And not into 14 small piles. PUT IT AWAY."
Quote:
Originally Posted by virgode
It amazes me how parents will defend their kids, it could be from sheer embarrassment, but that response would bother me a bit.
I have a theory: I think it's a generational thing. When I was a kid, it was parents vs. kids. If my parents went down the block and knocked on Mrs. Keegan's door, she would say, "Oh, gawd, what did Danny do NOW?" Not, "Not MY son," like so many of today's parents.
Of course, it didn't hurt that all of the parents knew each other socially and were always having parties in the neighborhood. All of the post-war cookie-cutter GI Bill houses in my neighborhood on Long Island came with bars in the basement, and the new suburbanites made good use of them. Each family was known for hosting one particular holiday--across the street was Independence Day because they had the built-in pool, across and down one was Labor Day, next door was Memorial Day, four doors down the other way was New Year's, my family was Halloween (one year my father painted the basement black just for the party).
Now? No one knows their neighbors and everyone's a suspect, so if our kids get into a fight, your kid is a juvie while my kid is an angel. Honestly? One reason I never had kids is because of other parents.
I have a theory: I think it's a generational thing. When I was a kid, it was parents vs. kids. If my parents went down the block and knocked on Mrs. Keegan's door, she would say, "Oh, gawd, what did Danny do NOW?" Not, "Not MY son," like so many of today's parents.
Of course, it didn't hurt that all of the parents knew each other socially and were always having parties in the neighborhood. All of the post-war cookie-cutter GI Bill houses in my neighborhood on Long Island came with bars in the basement, and the new suburbanites made good use of them. Each family was known for hosting one particular holiday--across the street was Independence Day because they had the built-in pool, across and down one was Labor Day, next door was Memorial Day, four doors down the other way was New Year's, my family was Halloween (one year my father painted the basement black just for the party).
Now? No one knows their neighbors and everyone's a suspect, so if our kids get into a fight, your kid is a juvie while my kid is an angel. Honestly? One reason I never had kids is because of other parents.
Theres been a few threads on the topic about neighbors and why people are so distant, a lot of opinion on why its happened.
This generation of parents take critizism of their kids as though its a personal attack on themselves, admitting their child is wrong, would be like admitting they hadn't taught them any differently and a reflextion of their parenting. In the end though, parents pay a price for all the defending and denial.
Have I identified them? Are all the posts on this board merely about ourselves? Go get a clue before you hurt yourself. You know nothing about my loyalties.
But you love selling their drama. Quite a hobby you have. Hobby away.
Oh by the way, can't wait for your next thread. Keep us posted
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Honestly? One reason I never had kids is because of other parents.
