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Please. Can this not become a debate about abortion...
I am heartbroken, and lost for words.
Like I said before..the best you can do is love her and support her. A pregnancy is not going to go away. You need to talk to your daughter, and then talk to her some more. She just took the most difficult road you can take, you need to help her on her journey. There is a baby involved now and its needs matter more than anyone elses.
What are you meant to do and say when your 16 year old daughter tells you she's pregnant? I feel like I'm watching all kinds of hopes and dreams fly out the window. Everything feels like it's been flipped upside down.
The father is 17. He has a shady past. Well he has a shady present too. We thought that if we outright forbid this relationship, that would just encourage it....
He says that he's going to change from how he's been acting over the last few years. But I can't help to think of my daughter being young, single with a baby while he's in jail or something...
My husband is stuck on anger right now.
What do you do?
Okay in the interest of not bothering people who don't agree with abortion i edited out my posts. I am sorry if what i said brought pain to anyone.
If i have to help her raise the child...then yes is partly my decision. Now if she somehow manages to pull a job out of her ass and finds her own place then fine.
Have you ever had an abortion? I havent but I believe it is a serious matter and should not be taken lightly. You make it sound that its no big deal. This is a young girl who what ever decision SHE makes is going to change her life. If you would force your daughter you would be lucky if the only thing she felt towards you is resentment.
I'm an not opposed to her getting an abortion but it should be her decision as for taking care of the baby there are many responsible teen moms who continue to go to school and work to make there lives better for them and thier child.
I would seriously urge her to consider adoption if she doesn't want to consider termination (which she has every right to make her own decision over). It's probably impossible for her to see right now but she will eventually be left 'holding the baby', it sounds as if the father has little to no chance of ever stepping up to the plate.
We haven't managed to have a full, calm conversation about the possibility of adoption yet...
She seems to think she/they can do this.....and the father is kind of surprisingly stubborn on this too...I just don't know where he would be or what he would be like in a year...2 years...He hasn't shown much responsibility yet. He says he's done with the life he's been living, his dad left him, he's not leaving his child......what a mess
Quote:
Originally Posted by chicagojlo
Do you feel like this has been the shock she needed to pull her life together, or is she likely to end up just palming the kid off on you and going back to her old ways?
She hasn't been terrible..this is a complete shock out of the blue. He's never pulled her into his ways. She'd always tell us not to worry about him, he's trying to change...
Have you ever had an abortion? I havent but I believe it is a serious matter and should not be taken lightly. You make it sound that its no big deal. This is a young girl who what ever decision SHE makes is going to change her life. If you would force your daughter you would be lucky if the only thing she felt towards you is resentment.
I'm an not opposed to her getting an abortion but it should be her decision as for taking care of the baby there are many responsible teen moms who continue to go to school and work to make there lives better for them and thier child.
I'm not going to answer it in the effort to not make this thread a war. And yes i have had one.
Have you and she discussed options? Is she set on having and raising the baby? Can you afford to help support the baby? Or are you home and can take care of the baby while she works and goes to school?
Not really yet. This is all new. I'm just trying to think now. We could help support the baby. His parents, well mom and stepdad....we don't even know them that well...I think they can afford to help...
Not really yet. This is all new. I'm just trying to think now. We could help support the baby. His parents, well mom and stepdad....we don't even know them that well...I think they can afford to help...
I work...
I think before you can even begin to think about things you guys need to sit down and discuss things. Ask her her entire plan, caring for the baby, school, financials etc. Then you can start to think. kwim?
there are many responsible teen moms who continue to go to school and work to make there lives better for them and thier child.
That is comforting. It's felt like the world stopped.
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