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If that happens, the kid can change his name later. My husband changed his middle and last names when his dad's true colors came out. It doesn't seem like it was a big pain to do.
I had a friend who changed her last name because the surname was sullied by her family members.
Your last name is much harder to change than your first name is. My husband plans on taking his middle name out of his name when he gets citizenship because it's his mom's maiden name, and he wants nothing to do with that name.
Personally, I hate the tradition of naming a child after the parent. I think the child should have its own identity and it causes less problems down the road with the names getting mixed up. I have many friends who have gotten mixed up with their fathers on more than one occasion and it takes alot of work to make things right. I think putting it as a middle name is fine...we did this as did my mother with me. My husband also agreed.
This child is not just his, it is yours and you most certainly have a say in what your child is named. if he cannot compromise than you have a bigger issue at hand here. He is not the only one in this. What is he going to do if you do have a daughter? The tradition will still be dead. I would find out what you are having and put an end to this craziness now. I hope for your sake it is a girl.
If that happens, the kid can change his name later. My husband changed his middle and last names when his dad's true colors came out. It doesn't seem like it was a big pain to do.
I have a family member trying to change their last name right now. It is going to cost over $5k, and will take over a year.
Maybe not a big pain to you, but changing your last name in any instance other than marriage/divorce is very hard to do in some peoples opinions.
I have a family member trying to change their last name right now. It is going to cost over $5k, and will take over a year.
Maybe not a big pain to you, but changing your last name in any instance other than marriage/divorce is very hard to do in some peoples opinions.
Well, I wasn't around when he did it. Maybe it was a pain, or maybe things have changed since then (20 years or so). I believe he had to go before a judge and have a valid reason for doing it. As soon as he said he was changing it to his mom's maiden name, it was a go.
In the case of the OP, we're only talking about what his first and middle names will be. his last name will be his father's no matter what. It would be an understatement to say that it is premature to choose a name based on the possibility of the dad becoming a deadbeat. Even if that possibility is taken into account, the last name won't be affected.
Start calling your husband by his real name and see if he starts to change his mind!
I might also sneak and find out if you are having a boy or girl. Then if you are having a girl you could back off about the name and see if your husband softens a bit (so that you can see how he handles disagreements).
]Start calling your husband by his real name and see if he starts to change his mind![/b]
I might also sneak and find out if you are having a boy or girl. Then if you are having a girl you could back off about the name and see if your husband softens a bit (so that you can see how he handles disagreements).
I have a family member trying to change their last name right now. It is going to cost over $5k, and will take over a year.
Maybe not a big pain to you, but changing your last name in any instance other than marriage/divorce is very hard to do in some peoples opinions.
Laws vary state by state, but it isn't a huge deal everywhere. I changed my last name in 2006. The entire process consisted of filling out a 3 page PDF file that I downloaded with the proper info, getting the paperwork notarized, dropping it off at the court house and paying a $30 filing fee. They mailed me a signed certificate stating that my name was legal changed a few weeks later. Then I just had to provide the updated name to bills, banks, etc, change my license over and mail the certificate to Social Security for a new card.
Sorry that it is taking your family member so much time and costing so much money.
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