Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Actually I've seen studies on how small children will usually choose healthy and balanced meals when given a choice. I'm sure it helps if they are used to being fed the right kinds of foods from the get go.
So you are accusing me of lying on an anonymous forum? I actually walked out of a student teaching situation in April due to the negative actions of the head teacher. I couldn't stand how she continuously barked out orders to the kids (ages 3 and 4) and her negative tone. While I agree that toddlers should not have free reign, some choice for preschoolers is healthy and I dislike when any adult is authoritarian.
So what is your point here? Nobody here is talking about "free reign", nobody here is letting their 2 year old stay up 2 hours past bedtime and eat a Caramilk for lunch every day. They will let their kid choose between an apple or grapes, or choose what kind of PJs when it's time for bed. We're talking about preschoolers right??
If I was to go to a coffee shop with my preschooler (funny enough we did about an hour ago), I asked him what he wanted. He asked for a fruit explosion - because he knows from history that when we go to Tim Hortons, he gets his choice of muffin. Don't make a mountain out of a mole hill.
whether they want to leave or what food they want?
Full disclosure: I am not a parent. Let's get this out of the way. So of course I must be clueless, right? Because all parents become child-rearing sages once their spawn arrives.
This occurs often with me: I am sitting in a cafe and a mother is asking her two-year-old what muffin or other food s/he wants. I actually saw a child burst into tears over it. It's too overwhelming to foist that sort of independence on a toddler or preschool kid. They crave parental boundaries/control. But so many parents are afraid of saying no or afraid of imposing their will on the child that they resort to this tactic, which I find destructive. At some point, the child will want stuff that the parent won't allow and then the shizzle will hit the fan.
A similar thing I see is asking the todder/preschooler if they want to leave the cafe. Great--give your child the idea that s/he calls the shot. Sounds like a recipe for success...
Toddlers don't get to control much in their lives. It may seem like it because they are so time-consuming (like they control you), but they don't get to actually voluntarily exert control over things.
And they are transitioning and testing their independence.
We give our 20 month old son a choice - do you want black-eyed peas or lima beans with lunch?
That's not the same thing as giving in when he says he wants waffles.
Giving him a sense of control over his environment, even in little bits (Do you want to go to the park or the gym? Which shirt do you want to wear? Which book do you want to read?) means so little in the big picture, but it means a TON to him.
He still has boundaries (just cuz he asks for something doesn't mean he gets it) and he's still the dude with the smallest voice in this house (even the dog gets to come in and out as she pleases - he doesn't).
You're surprised that a toddler picked a healthy meal? I dont get it. This is his typical type of choice since we only keep healthy things IN the fridge for him to choose from. Sometimes he asks for "ice cream" as a snack. Our ice cream consists of lemonade or yogurt mixed in with fruit in Popsicle molds. Its a matter of allowing your child to make decisions that are good. Does he ask for 'bad' food sometimes while out, yes. We dont ALWAYS say yes, if its something I dont want him to have, I'll divert and suggest something else and he's perfectly fine with that.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Sheesh, I was agreeing with you.
