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Personally, my family moved from NJ to Baltimore when I was in 8th grade. We moved early summer and I was miserable. We lived in a neighborhood with no other kids around to play with. I was so extremely bored all summer and still went to school not knowing a single person. 8th grade was terrible for me and it, unfortunately, changed my personality in some ways forever.
That said, I'm a girl, I was in 8th grade and we didn't live in a neighborhood with people for me to meet. But you can see why I'm very cautious about how this is handled for my boys. If we move at the end of the school year, I"m hoping to still get my boys involved in a swim team (which they've been involved in for the past two years) and probably some kind of VBS. We are also planning on moving in to a neighborhood with loads of kids constantly riding bikes, fishing, etc. But just because I 'plan' it or imagine it a certain way, I know there are some things out of my control. We would all like to move sooner, I just don't want to rush and be impatient and have it be detrimental to the boys. We do have control over when we move, job timing isn't an issue and we will definitely move all at once.
Thanks again for all of your responses and for taking time to chime in!!
It doesn't make too much difference, they'll have to adjust to a new school either way, but moving in the middle of the school year can leave a glitch in their education and give them less time to adjust to the idea of a new school.
I think a neighborhood swim team is a great idea! In my area, it is definitely THE summer activity. If you're fortunate enough to find one with lots of social events planned for both kids and adults, you'll all make friends in no time.
OP what state are you moving to and from? I'm betting that those specific forums may be able to help you find the right activities based on what's popular in that area.
Best of luck, moving can be hard for kids but I'm happy that my parents moved me around as a child, it's good to have different perspectives.
I moved at the end of summer with my child - we got here with about four days to spare until she had to start school. She's super outgoing and friendly, though, and in general doesn't have a hard time making friends. (She was entering the third grade when we moved.)
When I was a teenager, there were a few kids who moved to the high school I was at in the middle of the year. They got TONS of attention. The rest of us had been in school together for years, so a new person was a big deal (I grew up in a large metro area, too, so it wasn't like we were in the boonies). It was like people were practically fighting to hang out with the new person.
Unfortunately, it could be very hard for you to know what the local schools are like that you're moving to, so you won't know if they'll be one of those schools that loves outsiders. And much of it will depend on what your kids are like, too. The ones who are more fearless and willing to approach groups of people to talk to or play with will probably do better. My daughter is great with this - if I had moved as a young kid, however, I probably would've found it hard to make friends, as I am not nearly as outgoing.
EDIT: Team sports or church groups can almost provide built-in friends. Putting them on a swim team would be great.
I moved at the end of summer with my child - we got here with about four days to spare until she had to start school. She's super outgoing and friendly, though, and in general doesn't have a hard time making friends. (She was entering the third grade when we moved.)
When I was a teenager, there were a few kids who moved to the high school I was at in the middle of the year. They got TONS of attention. The rest of us had been in school together for years, so a new person was a big deal (I grew up in a large metro area, too, so it wasn't like we were in the boonies). It was like people were practically fighting to hang out with the new person.
Unfortunately, it could be very hard for you to know what the local schools are like that you're moving to, so you won't know if they'll be one of those schools that loves outsiders. And much of it will depend on what your kids are like, too. The ones who are more fearless and willing to approach groups of people to talk to or play with will probably do better. My daughter is great with this - if I had moved as a young kid, however, I probably would've found it hard to make friends, as I am not nearly as outgoing.
EDIT: Team sports or church groups can almost provide built-in friends. Putting them on a swim team would be great.
Most of my new schools either didn't like outsiders or were indifferent to them. The boys always liked me but I'm single now, go figure. When we moved to a small town in Iowa, it took me time to make new friends but I did. I ended up adjusting better than my mom and my brother who were both more outgoing than me too, go figure.
We maybe moving soon here as well. It would be towards the end of Feb and the children would start school in March in the new town. Now, as a teacher we get children all year round I have had students transfer the week before school is out. The whole scene would be different for my children going from a school district that is not the best (yep 49th in the nation) to one that is valued differently. I think that might be the greatest shock for them!!! I feel bad for my 9th grader as he does have his buddies, but he spends time with them online after school then in person. Meanwhile, my Kindergartner would most likely flourish in a new social environment. So there is no clear cut answer in what is the best time to move with children!!!
We maybe moving soon here as well. It would be towards the end of Feb and the children would start school in March in the new town. Now, as a teacher we get children all year round I have had students transfer the week before school is out. The whole scene would be different for my children going from a school district that is not the best (yep 49th in the nation) to one that is valued differently. I think that might be the greatest shock for them!!! I feel bad for my 9th grader as he does have his buddies, but he spends time with them online after school then in person. Meanwhile, my Kindergartner would most likely flourish in a new social environment. So there is no clear cut answer in what is the best time to move with children!!!
Totally true.
And like you said for your kids, the older one would probably have a harder time because of his friends, the same is true of my child now. She moved easily when she was in 3rd grade, but if we were to move now, she would be really upset. She's more tied to her friends now that she's older.
We moved my 3rd and 5th grader over spring break. We toured the school once we knew we were moving & so their teachers had several weeks to prepare. The teachers did a great job of making them feel special when they arrived, and the old school was able to have a big send off.
Everyone wanted to get to know the new kids, they were assigned buddies in the beginning & by the time summer came, they knew a few kids to call and play.
Now that we are here going on 1 year, they have a ton of friends. I'm very happy we moved mid year, and that they didn't get lost in the shuffle of the new school year.
I agree- move a couple weeks before school starts. They have the summer to pay with friends and then not much down time before they meet new friends. It's hard to make friends over the summer with kids in scheduled activities, etc.
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