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Umm, no - she made a comment acknowledging how much the mother seemed to love playing with her daughter.
The other day, a co-worker's daughter-in-law gave birth to his first grandchild. I fussed over him, and quoted to him a line that an ex-boss had once said to me "A person has children so that one day they can have grandchildren." I didn't say it while thinking, 'Gee, why haven't any of your four other children had babies yet.'
Acknowledging that many people love to be grandparents is not mutually exclusive with shaming their children (especially single children in their 20's) for not yet having had kids.
Exactly.
I agree. The woman made a comment about the mom enjoying the baby. I think it is a stretch for the OP to take it as a personal insult.
You'll always get people saying this to you about kids. I will say that nowadays most people are postponing children, and of there are always people who don't want to have children or can't have children for whatever reason. It's a personal question. I would just laugh it off or just say, "maybe, eventually."
That being said, if you are thinking about having children, it is better to have them when you're young. Your fertility goes down after 30. You just don't know how your body will be. That's your choice, though. If you want to have children, then make it a priority, otherwise, you might be too old. Whatever you choose is fine.
Plenty of women have healthy babies after 30 (even in the 35-40 age range).
OP I would have responded made her feel really uncomfortable some how. Maybe tell her I couldn't have children or something that would make her feel bad. I hate when people tell others what to do with their lives. A friend of mine recently called me laughing that even her Uber driver was telling her to have kids...she too is single.
OP I would have responded made her feel really uncomfortable some how. Maybe tell her I couldn't have children or something that would make her feel bad. I hate when people tell others what to do with their lives. A friend of mine recently called me laughing that even her Uber driver was telling her to have kids...she too is single.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat
I agree. The woman made a comment about the mom enjoying the baby. I think it is a stretch for the OP to take it as a personal insult.
Yeah, I'm not quite seeing it either.
Maybe it would have been obvious if we'd been there...
........While I think it's a tacky question or remark to make towards someone, if a person said this to me, I would not have gotten bent out of shape about it. .......
Maybe not bent out of shape but when it happens, one does remember.
As it is, I have not heard such for decades but I do remember similar in the service when it was asked...or perhaps stated to me, "Do you always want to be alone?".
A, B, and C. A: Our society, IMHO, is programmed for that when we are adults, we will get married and have children. As I have noted before elsewhere, what kills a TV show for me is when they move from the format of being single to getting married. It happens, it is what sells shows to most of the population but to me, it is a blaring slap in the face and soon after that, I stop watching.
B: To me, it hurts to be constantly reminded that such is the way that life is to be (as most of the population understands it, that is) .........so I don't think the OP is out of line at all to take offense at a question that is further into such a line of thought to one degree or another.
C: Back then, I had no answer to such a question. These days, I would probably just take the diplomatic response of "Well, that is what makes horse races." or alternately, take another country's way of seeing things and respond in that way. Ie, if someone says I was absent yesterday, I should not offer an explanation but rather respond "Merci" (Thank you for missing me). Perhaps such a response could be used in these situations as well as in "Thank you for your concern".
That said, however, it is something of a false answer, of a camouflage for it stops me from expressing how such inquiries really make me feel. Which is to say, "Your interpretation of what my feelings should be is not appreciated.".
Which comes back to answer the OP's question. Why do people criticize? Because they believe that everyone believes just like they do.
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