Do parents of children of just one gender sometimes wish having a child of the other? (sucking, girl)

[sas318]

I have 2 teens boys and no, I don't want a girl, and I'm never envious of those who have one.

The only reason why I'd want a girl is to use the name Spouse and I picked out (Rebecca), and I love girl names. I'm usually not stubborn, but I would've put my foot down with this name that I picked. I don't have the same attachment with boy names.

[tomektomek]

Oh don't get me wrong - having a child is a treasure, regardless of number or gender.

I just feel that as a man I'd love to have a mini-me who to influence to become a better man than me, hopefully be best friends with and be to him the father that I didn't have. And maybe he would influence me to become my best version so he has a good role model to look up to. I'll totally melt inside if he tells me one day he'd like to be like me, or become a dad like me or even just watching him score a goal and succeed at a sport of his liking when he's in high school or college.

But also just imagining seeing for example a ballet play (which I hate) and loving it because my daughter's dancing and looking back at me and my wife fills me with joy. And just the thought of taking my grown-up girl to the altar at her wedding fills me with a mix of pride I helped raise that grown-up lady, love and a bit of sadness of course...

I know I am idealizing parenting as a whole but even now I realize I would be a great dad to children of both genders.

I'd also like to be the one who puts and end to the long family "tradition" of abusive parenting where you don't show any affection and just shower your kids with demands and criticism. I'll do my best to be a friend of them and not an overly-demanding tyrant like my dad and his dad were. We don't chose our parents sadly but we can create the family we want as spouses and/or parents and that is giving me hope. I don't believe in astrology but I loved one phrase describing myself "Your purpose in life is giving the hope, love and light that you didn't receive yourself as a child".

[Jo48]

We had only Daughters. Now we only have GrandSONS. So............

[MCNJ]

No. Very happy with what I was blessed.

[CLfan1977]

I had a sister, no brothers, no cousins, so I wanted daughters. Naturally, I had 2 sons. I learned to appreciate boys and support their love of sports, rock music, etc. Looking back, I may not have been as good a mother of daughters, since I had preconceived notions of how girls “should be”.

My sons are wonderful adults. No regrets.

[DubbleT]

Originally Posted by tomektomek

OK, boomer, pretending certain professions do not tend to be 90%+ of one gender wouldn't make a wrong right.

Uh, he's not responding to the fact that certain professions tend to be dominated by one gender. It's the rest of your assumptions in your response...
As for the rest of this topic, again a whole lot of assumptions being made. Don't assume a child of the same gender will be a 'mini-me' or that it will be an immediate bond of some sort, because you might be sorely disappointed by that expectation. I have been blessed with one of each and let me tell you a lot of my gender expectations were turned on their heads. What if it's your daughter who likes bodybuilding or sports and your son who likes shopping and ballet?

[2mares]

Originally Posted by DubbleT

Uh, he's not responding to the fact that certain professions tend to be dominated by one gender. It's the rest of your assumptions in your response...
As for the rest of this topic, again a whole lot of assumptions being made. Don't assume a child of the same gender will be a 'mini-me' or that it will be an immediate bond of some sort, because you might be sorely disappointed by that expectation. I have been blessed with one of each and let me tell you a lot of my gender expectations were turned on their heads. What if it's your daughter who likes bodybuilding or sports and your son who likes shopping and ballet?

Yep. Parents really should not have any preconceived expectations of their future children.
Man plans, God laughs.

[Stagemomma]

I had two girls and never felt the loss of having no boys. My mom harped for years that boys were easier than girls and she was abusive to me and not so much my brothers so I was determined to prove her wrong. I can't say my girls were easy (even as young adults their sibling rivalry is toxic and terrible) but I love them both dearly and wouldn't trade them for the world.

My ex was really mad that we didn't have a third child so that he could have a son but he sucked as a husband and cheated on me so there was no way I was going to have another child with him. He now has a stepson. More power to him.

[msRB311]

I have a boy and a girl so I'm good. I think plenty of people who have 3 or 4 of just one gender wish they had the other gender. My aunt had 4 boys and she had wanted a girl. Didn't mean she didn't love her boys, but she had wanted a girl too. She didn't get one and she knew that was a possibility.

A former co worker of mine was a fairly down to earth woman (or so i thought), but very much an over achiever and also the breadwinner (husband doesn't work). She had two boys who were over 5, one has special needs, and i was pretty surprised when she became pregnant with a 3rd. She just seemed stretched so thin already. When she found out she was having ANOTHER boy she was upset. I remember her saying she felt bad for feeling upset but couldn't deny it. I sort of thought it was a little ridiculous. I understood kind of but it seemed like her goal for having the 3rd was to have a girl. She is very much a woman's rights/let's break the glass ceiling/hear us roar type female...apparently she wanted to raise 'a strong woman'. There's always adoption i guess.

[Ceece]

My firstborn was a girl and when I found out I was going to have a boy I was a little annoyed since I thought 2 of the same would be easier, and what did I know about boys? I was wrong and was really happy when my son was born since he was a very easy going child and now an easy going man!