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Bingo. You win. This is exactly what happens. My oldest son was picky when he was little. We never forced him to eat, never played food games, never made an issue of food. As he got older he broadened his horizons past chicken, cheerios, and strawberries because we never set up a food battle so that when he was ready to branch out to other foods he did so.
He is now 15 and he has a really healthy attitude towards food. He is 5'6" tall, a very muscular 135 lb. and eats a wide variety of foods. I think that I could have made him hold on to his pickiness by making food a battleground.
Bah. Neither my husband nor I are picky eaters, but two our kids are. Drives us nuts.
Right, and how do you handle him if he doesn't eat what you made for a meal??
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes
Mine would have been picky eaters if my husband hadn't told them that I wasn't a short order cook.
My sister's children are picky eaters because she makes different food for them---and caters to their likes and dislikes.
Too many parents are uncomfortable with telling children, "This is the meal, if you don't like it, don't eat it, but you're not getting anything else until the next meal or snack time."
Parents make the mistake of thinking their children will starve if they refuse to eat a meal or two.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaMc46
I don't think that it's fair to say all American kids are picky eaters.
Picky eaters are made, not born. It happens when a kid refuses to eat the meal his/her parent has prepared and demands something else. The parent complies, therefore becoming a short-order cook and creating an ongoing problem.
My kids aren't picky. They know they have two choices when it comes to meal time: They can eat what I've prepared or they can leave the table. Of course, they come grocery shopping with me and I ask for their opinions on what we should have for dinner during the upcoming week. As long as they suggest healthy meals, I'm open to their suggestions.
My oldest would eat non-stop for a day then just pick for a couple days, eat non-stop for a day, pick for a a couple. Once I figured that out, I fed him accordingly. He STILL does that at age 17.
My niece has to be one of the pickiest eaters ever but then again her parents would make her a "sandwich" with peanut butter on the top half of the piece of bread and apricot jam (NOT JELLY) on the bottom half of the bread--they couldn't touch or she wouldn't eat it nor could you fold the bread, put 2 pieces of bread together, etc. When you cater to a 2 year old like this guess what happens (she is now 15 and STILL eats like this).
Parents need to keep in mind that a kid's stomach is about the size of their fist. If you give them more solid food than that, they will probably not eat it.
Bingo. You win. This is exactly what happens. My oldest son was picky when he was little. We never forced him to eat, never played food games, never made an issue of food. As he got older he broadened his horizons past chicken, cheerios, and strawberries because we never set up a food battle so that when he was ready to branch out to other foods he did so.
He is now 15 and he has a really healthy attitude towards food. He is 5'6" tall, a very muscular 135 lb. and eats a wide variety of foods. I think that I could have made him hold on to his pickiness by making food a battleground.
Good post...fixating equals eating problems.
However, Moms should NOT be short order cooks. If you don't like dinner, make a sandwich or eat cereal. That's how I was raised.
But he's gotten older and over a lot of it. Little kids need time to develop more interest in 'adult foods.' What 2 year old kid wants to eat lobster newburg when they can have fish sticks or chicken nuggets.
A child who's had more exposure to "adult food" than to the processed crap that is labeled "kid food".
One of my big complaints used to be that restaurants have such limited children's menus. Invariably, the adult menu has a wide variety of choices, but no matter where you go-- Chinese, Italian, seafood, fern bar, Greek-- the kid's menu has spaghetti, chicken nuggets, hamburgers, and pizza. Why can't the four-year-old choose teriyaki or eggplant parmesan? All restaurants would have to do is offer a half-sized serving of adult portions. Especially with pasta or rice-based dishes, or salads, that would be easy.
And FTR I say "used to be" not because the menus have improved-- because they have not-- but because my kids are now too old for the children's menus.
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Originally Posted by GypsySoul22
I am not a big advocate of 'eat it or nothing' parenting.
It wastes both food and my time to play short order cook, and to prepare two or three separate dinners. Not happening. Nobody in this family's in danger of death by starvation if they miss a meal.
Kids are picky because they aren't starving to death. Starve your kids a little and then we'll see how picky they are.
Not only are they not starving, most American kids haven't even been really HUNGRY, or as I say, HAWNGRY.
Part of the obesity problem is that many Americans don't space out their eating any longer, as most Europeans still do. Our kids are picky because they don't have a real appetite at mealtimes. Kids work up an appetite for supper by running around outside after school for a couple of hours on only a glass of milk and two cookies for an afterschool snack.
Too many parents these days let their kids veg out in front of the tv after school with a bag of chips, and then allow the kids to wander in and out of the kitchen snacking before supper. In an alarming number of families, there is no dinner time at all--no cooking and sitting down to a common meal. Fast food or microwave dinners at all hours according to each person's schedule and inclination take the place of supper.
To starving children, even bad food satisfies their hunger. To an ordinary kid, any food seems more appetizing when you're hungry. So parents can prepare a regular series of adult meals, including your children's favorites every week or so. Then quit buying the snacks. Let your GI tract rest between meals. Let the kids learn what hunger is all about. (Fasting used to be an expected part of life for Christians, and remains so for Muslims--the goal is compassion for the poor.) Typical kids won't go more than a few days of food deprivation before either breaking down and eating something they don't like or finally getting the chance to eat something they do like.
I also advocate the portion control part of eating. Each child should get about a tablespoon of each food according to their age. This should not be enough to satisfy a hungry child. They must finish each food before they are allowed second helpings of their favorites. Parent also need to keep in mind that just like adults, children's tastes can change and develop. After trying a food several times, a child may begin to appreciate it more. I was a picky child. My mother said I would learn to like foods as I grew up. Some I did and some I didn't. But I like things that I never would have liked as a child, while most of the foods that revolted me then still do.
I do not think children should be forced to eat. Sometimes they may not feel well, or just not have a taste for the available food. Other foods we classified as "weird" and didn't require the children to eat--especially spicy food, squid, etc. I am forever grateful that my mother did not force me to eat seafood, although we had our battles over eggs, which I refused to eat. I still avoid eating cold-blooded animals and eggs of any kind. But I love super-hot Thai food and most kinds of stinky cheese.
They are picky because their parents allow it and then it turns into a very bad chronic situation. The parent should serve the meal and if the kid eats they eat. If they don't they go hungry. Eventually they will eat and they will eat what is served to them. Most kids these days could stand to skip a few days of eating anyways they're so FAT.
Maybe not the rest of the world, but definitely in many African, Asian, and South American countries where food is hard-won through hard labor, and is scarce. Children digging through mountains of garbage for bits of rotten throwaway scraps. Children happy and eager to eat anything edible to survive.
Why are American children picky eaters?
Is it the overabundance of food?
Is it just an excuse to behave badly, a way to be defiant and rebel against parents?
What is the cause for this ungrateful, spoiled behavior?
(Not talking about food allergies...just pickiness!)
My kids are American and they aren't picky eaters at all. I don't allow them to be that, they know if they don't like what's served, they can have peanut butter sandwiches that they make themselves or get a bowl of cereal.
I think there are some spoiled American children whose parents cater to them too much.
I think you answered your own question. Kids in wealthier countries can afford to be picky where as kids in not so wealthy countries are glad to eat whatever is given them. Kids in wealthier countries don't know what it is like to starve or work really hard for the scraps they do get. Even those in our own country that are having it tough haven't really had to feel the hunger pains like those in places like Africa, Asia and South America because thankfully we have a government and charities who do what they can to help out those in need.
That's also got a lot to do with it. There are countries where kids would go through garbage cans, happy to find something to eat from them, but here we don't have that situation. Kids here won't eat a moldy slice of bread or cheese but in some countries, they'd be happy to have that.
This kid just STARED at it on his plate. He never had homemade---only Kraft from the box. He woudn't even TASTE it!
My daughter doesn't like home-made either because it's too rich.
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