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No I wouldn't date a man who believed in spanking a kid. That's one thing I wouldn't be able to handle. Ok, so I'm not interest in kids but if he tell me those views or I were to see him doing that a niece, nephew or another kid, it would be ''bye, bye'' for me.
If you can't solve things in a civilized way with others and esp. with a child, plain simple you got no self-control. Turn-off for me....
You don't have any kids yet, do you?
And the answer to your OP question is, "NO". Of course, I'm not dating anybody since I've been married for over 26 years.
I find it amusing how many people without children declare spanking is bad and they would NEVER do it.
I am a pro spanker. I dont believe very young children have the mental capacity to reason things out. All children go thru stages of pushing the envelope and outright rebellion, spanking is not always necessary but sometimes trying to reason if futile.
My kids are grown so it is not an issue for me.
I find it amusing how many people without children declare spanking is bad and they would NEVER do it.
I am a pro spanker. I dont believe very young children have the mental capacity to reason things out. All children go thru stages of pushing the envelope and outright rebellion, spanking is not always necessary but sometimes trying to reason if futile.
My kids are grown so it is not an issue for me.
Exactly. Most of the outspoken experts in child-rearing are people who have never had children.
My wife & I spanked our kids. We didn't beat them. But when there was a very serious point to be made, or when there was direct and open defiance involved, they got spanked.
All 3 of our kids are now fantastic, well-adjusted, happy young adults.
I've asked all of them, on separate occasions, if they remember me ever spanking them. Only one of the three remembers being spanked. He said he knew he deserved it, and now actually thinks it was kind of funny. Apparently we didn't scar them for life.
No I wouldn't date a man who believed in spanking a kid. That's one thing I wouldn't be able to handle. Ok, so I'm not interest in kids but if he tell me those views or I were to see him doing that a niece, nephew or another kid, it would be ''bye, bye'' for me.
If you can't solve things in a civilized way with others and esp. with a child, plain simple you got no self-control. Turn-off for me....
What was you labor and delivery like?
How was your pregnancy?
How do you juggle mulitple sick kids in the middle of the night?
How are you financially preparing for schooling?
How does your child learn best: tactile, auditory, sensory...
What's the best way to keep gloves on toddlers?
Oh, that's right, you don't have any so you don't know!!!!
Thus, you are definitely the subject matter expert in disciplining children
Nothing better to do than post a random topic to see the reaction?
FTR, I'll state that in the early years of raising my kids I did spank a couple of times. Its not a discipline technique that I think is particularly effective. I think its more constructive to reward and reinforce good behavior, divert a child's attention from problematic behavior, take away privileges, and ground older children. I also think anyone prone to abuse because of childhood experiences should refrain completely from spanking.
My problem with this question is that it seems to assert that engaging in one behavior--spanking--makes one a bad spouse and a bad parent who is unworthy of a union. Its an example to me of how something has been blown totally out-of-proportion. Its amazing to me how culture changes over time. Thirty years ago, you would never have heard this.
Heaven knows we have enough real problems with those we date, become engaged too, or ultimately choose to marry. For example, I'd never marry someone who was drug addicted, or alcoholic. I wouldn't want to marry someone who was lazy to the point where they would neither work, nor help raising children. No spouse or child should have to put up with someone who is truly physically, mentally, or emotionally abusive. Nor should one be expected to tolerate adultery from a mate.
The OP certainly has a right to decide who she wants or doesn't want a relationship with. There is no argument from me on that account. I do question her sense of proportionality though if she singles "a spouse who would spank" out without mentioning any of the behaviors I listed above.
What was you labor and delivery like?
How was your pregnancy?
How do you juggle mulitple sick kids in the middle of the night?
How are you financially preparing for schooling?
How does your child learn best: tactile, auditory, sensory...
What's the best way to keep gloves on toddlers?
Oh, that's right, you don't have any so you don't know!!!!
Thus, you are definitely the subject matter expert in disciplining children
Nothing better to do than post a random topic to see the reaction?
I was posting about what would be one of my deal-breakers in a man as my potential long-term b/f or husband. Sorry but I wouldn't be able to stay with someone holding those strong views.
The OP certainly has a right to decide who she wants or doesn't want a relationship with. There is no argument from me on that account. I do question her sense of proportionality though if she singles "a spouse who would spank" out without mentioning any of the behaviors I listed above.
Yes same as I wouldn't date a man that stinks or goes clubbing everyday.
Just the following statements: ''You bet I'll smack them if they talked back to me'' ''Spare the rod, spoil the kid'', ''They need more of that now, hit them or else they will become criminals'' or assuming that not spanking leads to criminal behavior all the time (putting generalizations) would be a huge deal-breaker to me. By the way, I do know of a cousin that got spanked as a kid. Later on by the time he was in his late teens to young adulthood he was a trouble-maker he would get drunk many times to the point he was turning into an alcoholic. And no, him and the sister weren't abused, it was the same discipline. So explain me that? Why was he a trouble-maker while the sisters turned out ok?
Last edited by Sunflower_lol; 01-21-2010 at 12:05 PM..
I was posting about what would be one of my deal-breakers in a man as my potential long-term b/f or husband. Sorry but I wouldn't be able to stay with someone holding those strong views.
I know, geez, never would want to stick around w/ anyone who holds strong views...gosh, that would be a total buzz kill.
There is a difference b/w being a parent and going out on a date.
No I wouldn't date a man who believed in spanking a kid. That's one thing I wouldn't be able to handle. Ok, so I'm not interest in kids but if he tell me those views or I were to see him doing that a niece, nephew or another kid, it would be ''bye, bye'' for me.
If you can't solve things in a civilized way with others and esp. with a child, plain simple you got no self-control. Turn-off for me....
I wish you luck in finding someone as close-minded and self-righteous as yourself.
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