Dear Liberals: We want a divorce (Limbaugh, unemployed, legal, healthcare)
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"You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don’t need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don’t need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free"
"In the spirit of friendly parting, I’ll bet you ANWAR which one of us will need whose help in 15 years."
Well considering that I think most people don't want to live in a nanny state that dictates what you can and can't do with your own body, who can and can't get married, isn't receptive to non-Christian faiths, provides no health care for children or the elderly, gets rid of all those "evil socialist" policies like libraries, police forces, schools, firemen, and the postal service, and relies on people like Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, and George W. Bush to serve as role models, I think it's a pretty good bet that it won't be us liberals. Another thing in our favor is that we don't start fake-ass wars on terror and we're actually capable of communicating with and working with foreign countries. As far as I can see, so far our side has superior numbers, a less authoritarian government, better health care, and better foreign relations. So yeah, I'm thinking we'll be fine over here. Don't forget to write!
Papa Mike’s Blog » Blog Archive » I Want A Divorce! (http://www.papamiket.com/?p=14306 - broken link)
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, and Obama supporters..
We have stuck together since the late 1950’s, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know, we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but, sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot, and will not ever agree on what is right, so let’s just end it on friendly terms. We can smile, chalk it up to irreconcilable differences, and go our own way.
Here is a model separation agreement:
Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friend ly agr eement. After that it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.
We don’t like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we’ll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O’Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them) .
We’ll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies, and illegal aliens. We’ll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO’s, and rednecks. We’ll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.
You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we’ll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks, and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we’ll help provide them security.
We’ll keep our Judeo-Christian values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, and Shirley McClaine. You can also have the U.N. But we will no longer be paying the bill.
We’ll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find.
You can give everyone healthcare, if you can find any practicing doctors. We’ll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right. We’ll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I’m sure you’ll be happy to substitute "Imagine", "I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing", "Kum Ba Ya", or "We Are the World".
We’ll practice trickle down economics, and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you we’ll keep our history, our name, and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots, and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I’ll bet you ANWAR which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely, John J. Wall
Law Student and an American
P.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda.
Well considering that I think most people don't want to live in a nanny state that dictates what you can and can't do with your own body, who can and can't get married, isn't receptive to non-Christian faiths, provides no health care for children or the elderly, gets rid of all those "evil socialist" policies like libraries, police forces, schools, firemen, and the postal service, and relies on people like Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, and George W. Bush to serve as role models, I think it's a pretty good bet that it won't be us liberals. Another thing in our favor is that we don't start fake-ass wars on terror and we're actually capable of communicating with and working with foreign countries. As far as I can see, so far our side has superior numbers, a less authoritarian government, better health care, and better foreign relations. So yeah, I'm thinking we'll be fine over here. Don't forget to write!
Don't forget things like electricity in rural areas. Along woth anything else that isn't cost effective.
LOL, great post. But your post name... : "Acorn" has a foul reputation in the political sphere. It's associated with corruption and criminals . I'm not sure you'll be happy using it.
We just did, we separate you from control of the government.
So, in the immortal words of Lee Iaccoca, "Lead, follow or get out of the way" and since you could lead, you have two remaining choices.
No choice of just avoiding taxes all together?
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