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I never felt that I have to have kids biological urge. My MIL gave me a hard time about not wanting to supply her with future play things. She was very disrespectful of our wishes as my husband never wanted kids either. It's not selfish it's just the way you're wired. I have this thing for animals much to my husbands dismay. I would much rather have that black rabbit with the floppy ears that he won't let me have then have a baby.
In my earlier years I always thought kids were a pain in the butt and why would i ever want to burden myself with them,as time went on i got married and shortly thereafter we were parents to a beautiful baby girl,not long after we had another beautiful baby girl, while kids can be a handfull at times its not all negatives,watching them grow is a joy for me,all the things you do with them and the places you go and the other parents you meet is very rewarding, now i derive much pleasure watching their lives unfold as they head out in the world to make lives of their own.
At this point i couldnt imagine a life without them, its nice to know that they will always have fond memories of Mom and Dad and can have many stories to tell of this and that and experiences they gained.
At 66yrs old the kids give my life relevance,it gives my life a sense of continuance after i'm gone.
Those friends of mine who chose not to have kids seem to be missing something in their lives that only a full family can bring and those that are divorced or for whatever reason live alone i just dont understand how they endure the loneliness of living a life all by themselves..
While for some its a good idea to not have kids and others in their youth may not relish the thought of having kids be aware that as one ages different ways of thinking occur and what may not be plausible in your youth may become very enjoyable as you get older..
People really need to stop believing that it is always wrong to be selfish. Yes sure maybe choosing not to have children is considered selfish by those who wish to benefit from your procreating but then they are being selfish for wanting you to do something that you don't want to do in order to please themselves. Maybe it is a selfish choice or maybe the choice is based on well thought out reasoning as to health and emotional issues not to mention living situations and finances.
You don't owe anyone an explanation as to why you choose not to reproduce. That decision is yours alone. Just also keep in mind that if you enter a committed relationship that you and your partner share that choice.
You don't owe your parents anything. Certainly you don't owe them grandchildren.
No. It's selfish to have kids when you lack the resources to care for them, as so many do.
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