Dear Men: Want a strong, independent woman?

[CorporateCowboy]

Originally Posted by GeoffD

If you pick trailer trash Barbie, you’re not likely to have a very good outcome.

Sound advice, to be sure - lol.

[Larry Caldwell]

Originally Posted by CarnivalGal

My neighbors are a good example. They both work. She was constantly asking him to help more. He would when she asked, but she shouldn't have to ask him when he's staring right at a sink full of dishes. They had a cleaning person come in every couple of weeks, but they weren't there every day to do the daily tasks. One particular source of contention was laundry. He always pulled the, "Well, I mow the lawn all the time (once every 2 weeks)." So he thought he shouldn't have to do laundry, which is a heck of a lot more than every 2 weeks. She suggested hiring someone to mow the lawn. Got quotes and it was $150 a month. He thought that was ridiculous because he could just do it himself. He suggested using a laundry service. That was $600 a month, which he was totally fine with. It made no sense. Anyway, they are divorced now. She moved out and he is still distraught over it. He still doesn't understand why she left, because "he's a nice guy" (which he is), and he helped out around the house (not nearly as much as he thought he did).

Women discount the work men do around the house. Doing a load of laundry takes maybe 5 minutes, with another 10 to fold it and put it away. Mowing the lawn takes maybe an hour, with extra trips to buy gasoline and maintain the mower. I do the dishes, and accomplish the whole task while microwaving a bowl of soup for 3 minutes. The real household chore is mopping the floors, which I do because I'm stronger, faster, and do a better job.

My wife is not a great housekeeper. If I waited for her to get down on her hands and knees to scrub the baseboards, it would never happen. I shampoo the carpets, change furnace filters, and do the majority of the cooking. It doesn't upset me, and I don't think any less of my wife for it. She doesn't pressure wash the driveway or clean the gutters either. I also do windows. Left to her own devices, she would never do an oil change, check tire pressure, or wash her car. Mostly she has no idea what I do around the house. I also balance the books and reconcile the budget. It took me years to convince her that credit card bills did not get magically paid without costing her anything.

It's all a part of living. If you want to sip wine and eat bon bons, run the washer while you are at it.

[Larry Caldwell]

Originally Posted by LilLisa83

Wow lucky you. I don't know of one happy marriage

Pretty much anyone capable of a long term relationship has one. If everyone around you is unhappy, the problem is not the marriage, it's one or both of the people.

[Dave_n_Tenn]

Originally Posted by Shalop

I saw a few people saying that no men would want this type of "strong, independent" woman.


This is complete BS. I'm sure that a lot of "men's rights," "meninism," and "incel"-type groups would like to believe that it's possible to boycott certain types of women, but unfortunately for those guys, that's just not how biology works. Wherever there are women, there will be men to chase after them, regardless of their views.


But even without this biology argument, I'll say that there are plenty of men (particularly, liberal men from big liberal cities, who believe in causes like feminism, abortion, women's rights and liberation, etc) who would significantly prefer an ambitious career woman than a complacent one. Not for the reasons mentioned in the article, however.

It's never a binary choice.