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Back in 2019, the employer once told us to telework so they could renovate the office, and I had a noticeable anxiety attack in the meeting room due to not knowing if my internet at home could support it or if I would just have to burn through my vacation time. Though they did eventually let me stay, this left somewhat of a scar on me.
Then in March of this year, when there were only about 1,000 cases of COVID-19 in all of America, my employer was already starting to talk about telework. For those couple of weeks between then and when everything closed down, I thought it was an absurd over-reaction because I expected this to die out like SARS and Ebola, and that it was just another media brouhaha . Though they proved right, the anxiety I suffered for that fateful week or two, and anger at what I believed was an asinine over-reaction, has continued to take a toll on me. I find myself suffering bouts of anxiety at the thought that when this pandemic is over, they are going to shut things down the next time there is a Swine Flu/Bird Flu/Ebola scare even if it does not become a pandemic. To me, forced telework feels like an intolerable invasion of privacy because the employer is effectively imposing requirements on where you can live, in the sense that you have to have enough space for a home workspace, fast internet, and comfortable climate control on all day, plus accepting the possibility that you have to show co-workers the inside of your own home and the possibility of misplacing work-related items in your home . I also find myself suffering anger whenever business executives eat at a dangerous restaurant while simultaneously telling employees to telework because of COVID-19, which due to my psychological problems, feels like an intolerable hypocrisy. Last weekend I almost went into a rage and had to talk to a friend to calm myself down.
Can this pass, or will I need therapy post pandemic?
Tell yourself that telework has surely saved tens of thousands of lives, possibly your own. It is a solution and an opportunity during dangerous times. Perhaps it was nerve-wracking before you were up and using it but you should be glad you have a job that you can perform from a computer at home. General Patton would have smacked you upside the head.
You need to step up for the greater good and get over your worthless feelings. I'm really not trying to be mean but PTSD? Are you serious? Maybe try Buddhism with or without meditation. You sound obsessed with your inner feelings but as described, those feelings are nonsense. Good luck!
You have anger issues and some anxiety, but you don't have PTSD. You don't mention many/most of the required symptoms of PTSD. You've not experienced the kind of life threatening trauma that triggers PTSD. When people erroneously and randomly claim they have a mental health issue like PTSD, it diminishes the very real problems of those that have been clinically diagnosed with it. It makes it more difficult for those people to be taken seriously.
Many people are anxious now. Many people are more angry than typical. You overreact and need to find a way to realize you are overreacting and change it.
You have anger issues and some anxiety, but you don't have PTSD. You don't mention many/most of the required symptoms of PTSD. You've not experienced the kind of life threatening trauma that triggers PTSD. When people erroneously and randomly claim they have a mental health issue like PTSD, it diminishes the very real problems of those that have been clinically diagnosed with it. It makes it more difficult for those people to be taken seriously.
Many people are anxious now. Many people are more angry than typical. You overreact and need to find a way to realize you are overreacting and change it.
Exactly, I don't think that the OP is suffering from true PTSD. Many, many people are having issues with anxiety and uncertainty these days, but that's not the same thing.
And, if your workplace is reasonable, you should be able to discuss the future of working from home, and ask questions about how your employer responded to the crisis and what that means going forward. Some workplaces provide resources or have guidelines so that there is more equity in home offices.
You actually have more control over your environment by working at home.
It is important not to become overdependent on an employer and to be flexible when it comes to work.
If working from home is a requirement you can think of the things you can do to alleviate some anxiety, like putting up a folding privacy screen behind you during zoom meetings so no one can see your home interior. It isn't that hard to set up a work space even in a small room, it's a matter of organization.
We all hate the hypocrisy of higher ups seeming to flout the rules do as I say not as I do, I think anger is a normal reaction to that.
Your employer is going to do what they think is best for the company, right or wrong, and it is wasted emotion to get very upset about the larger things you cannot control, try to instead concentrate on the things you can control.
I don't think there will really be a "post pandemic" as in back to normal, but that some changes will be permanent and we will have to adjust to that.
Back in 2019, the employer once told us to telework so they could renovate the office, and I had a noticeable anxiety attack in the meeting room due to not knowing if my internet at home could support it or if I would just have to burn through my vacation time. Though they did eventually let me stay, this left somewhat of a scar on me.
Then in March of this year, when there were only about 1,000 cases of COVID-19 in all of America, my employer was already starting to talk about telework. For those couple of weeks between then and when everything closed down, I thought it was an absurd over-reaction because I expected this to die out like SARS and Ebola, and that it was just another media brouhaha . Though they proved right, the anxiety I suffered for that fateful week or two, and anger at what I believed was an asinine over-reaction, has continued to take a toll on me. I find myself suffering bouts of anxiety at the thought that when this pandemic is over, they are going to shut things down the next time there is a Swine Flu/Bird Flu/Ebola scare even if it does not become a pandemic. To me, forced telework feels like an intolerable invasion of privacy because the employer is effectively imposing requirements on where you can live, in the sense that you have to have enough space for a home workspace, fast internet, and comfortable climate control on all day, plus accepting the possibility that you have to show co-workers the inside of your own home and the possibility of misplacing work-related items in your home . I also find myself suffering anger whenever business executives eat at a dangerous restaurant while simultaneously telling employees to telework because of COVID-19, which due to my psychological problems, feels like an intolerable hypocrisy. Last weekend I almost went into a rage and had to talk to a friend to calm myself down.
Can this pass, or will I need therapy post pandemic?
Not PTSD. You had serious psychological/anxiety issues PRIOR to Covid. You are still experiencing the same issues during Covid. You've needed therapy all this time. Covid hasn't changed your need for therapy.
If your company has an EAP, use it. If not, look into services like Talkspace or Betterhelp.
It sounds like you are making these things bigger than they are. To answer your complaints:
Most people have a kitchen table, coffee table, desk etc in their home to prop up a laptop. Most people have internet for their own person use. Most people have heating or cooling to their person needs. No one has to show the inside of their home. Do all on camera meetings in front of a blank, white wall. Keep all work items in a separate box and place them back when not in use. It doesn't matter what corporate executives do. Their lives and choices are different than yours.
Last edited by charlygal; 12-01-2020 at 08:37 AM..
I had to turn my kitchen's dining area into my "office," but because I like working from home this sacrifice wasn't too onerous. It's not entirely pretty, however, even with art on the wall. Zoom and some other meetings apps have a feature that obscures your background. I understand that sometimes there's no visually suitable spot available, especially if you're living in an apartment or with other people. That might help allay some of your situational anxiety, at least.
Living in Tucson, I also have sympathy for your concern about heating/cooling all day. My electric bill went up noticeably when I started working partly from home last year and had to keep the place at livable temperatures.
But, as others have said, you need to get your underlying anxiety under control, too. I have sympathy for that, too.
I don't know why you'd get PTSD from the telework specifically. It sounds like you have far deeper problems. This has been a hell of a year for all of us.
When I was looking for homes last year, one of the things I wanted was some dedicated office space. I have a loft that is about 175 sq. ft. 27" iMac that I remote into the work PC off of. Separate 28" monitor. L-Shaped desk with printer. Mini-fridge. 43" 4K TV behind me. Second chair for the cat. Art and travel memorabilia on the walls. Skylight above me for light and fresh air.
Why in the hell would I want to go back to a regular office environment? This year is immensely trying, but this generally ain't one of my problems.
You post the same over and over. You do not have PTSD You are bound and determined that you get your way. Get decent internet. Get a job where your special needs are being satisfied.
Have to agree with the replies you've already gotten OP. You are trying to turn the whole "pandemic/telework" shift from the norm into something its not. Using it to justify behavior patterns that already exist. If you are in counseling now, use it. Talk to your therapist about how to manage your anger and anxiety.
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