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This. The more the OP posts, the more it goes on about her sister’s perceived flaws. Initially I thought the sister was a single, childless woman who needed the gifts because she has no one else. Later on in the thread, I find out she actually has 2 kids, which makes me question the original premise more than I had previously. If money is actually a problem for her, it is no wonder that she shops at discount stores or sends samples.
I am DONE with her. I have never been so hurt in my life. I had gone to Cleveland with my husband, had lunch, and did a little shopping for our immediate family. It was a fun day. Until SHE called.
Earlier in the day she texted me that my package had arrived. She sounded "excited" in as much as someone can in a text. Included little hearts, and said, "I love you".
On our way home, my cell rang and I saw her name. I was honestly excited! I thought she was going to be happy. I said "Hi. I'm glad to hear from you! I spoke too soon. I honestly wasglad to hear from her. Until she spoke.
She proceeded to critique each gift so harshly and without any restraint. I was devastated, even suggesting that she send the presents back and that I buy her some books! She said "You really have different taste from me. I'll send them back and buy me some books! I can tell you the titles. Essentially, she inferred that I had bad taste. I had put much thought into these gifts.
I asserted myself and said, "You don't get to tear apart every present I bought for you, and you don't get to order your gifts or tell me what to buy. You are thoughtless, rude, and cruel! I am so hurt. (I was crying at this point) I am finished. Done with this $hyt and abuse!". I hung up.
On the way home I really sobbed. I am NOT a cryer. I expected something a bit weird, but not a critique of each and every gift and why they are not up to her standards.
At home, I checked Facebook messenger and she had written. I did not read it. Instead, I BLOCKED her.
A big THANK YOU to all of you who listened and offered good advice and support. I appreciate it more than you know.
This case is closed. She has borderline personality and I can not handle it. She is also thoughtless, manipulative and cruel. I am only now calming down. I do not need this in my life.
I am DONE with her. I have never been so hurt in my life. I had gone to Cleveland with my husband, had lunch, and did a little shopping for our immediate family. It was a fun day. Until SHE called.
Earlier in the day she texted me that my package had arrived. She sounded "excited" in as much as someone can in a text. Included little hearts, and said, "I love you".
On our way home, my cell rang and I saw her name. I was honestly excited! I thought she was going to be happy. I said "Hi. I'm glad to hear from you! I spoke too soon. I honestly wasglad to hear from her. Until she spoke.
She proceeded to critique each gift so harshly and without any restraint. I was devastated, even suggesting that she send the presents back and that I buy her some books! She said "You really have different taste from me. I'll send them back and buy me some books! I can tell you the titles. Essentially, she inferred that I had bad taste. I had put much thought into these gifts.
I asserted myself and said, "You don't get to tear apart every present I bought for you, and you don't get to order your gifts or tell me what to buy. You are thoughtless, rude, and cruel! I am so hurt. (I was crying at this point) I am finished. Done with this $hyt and abuse!". I hung up.
On the way home I really sobbed. I am NOT a cryer. I expected something a bit weird, but not a critique of each and every gift and why they are not up to her standards.
At home, I checked Facebook messenger and she had written. I did not read it. Instead, I BLOCKED her.
A big THANK YOU to all of you who listened and offered good advice and support. I appreciate it more than you know.
This case is closed. She has borderline personality and I can not handle it. She is also thoughtless, manipulative and cruel. I am only now calming down. I do not need this in my life.
OMG & you bought her a LOT! But, being the evil, b____, narc that she is, I'm not surprised by her actions. But, why do you have to get her books or ANYTHING at all? She doesn't deserve a pile of s____ much less anything actually good. And she doesn't deserve to even hear your voice on the phone.
You're now done, so be compeltely done, so that's great. That means you're free from getting her any more gifts for ANY occasion.
IF my fiance' can go no-contact w/ ALL 5 imemediate, narc fam members (both his (biological) parents & 3 sibs), anyoneone can get rid of 1 toxi person in their life.
Last edited by Forever Blue; 12-10-2021 at 12:56 PM..
OMG & you bought her a LOT! But, being the evil, b____, narc that she is, I'm not surprised by her actions. But, why do you have to get her books or ANYTHING at all? She doesn't deserve a pile of s____ much less anything actually good. And she doesn't deserve to even hear your voice on the phone.
You're now done, so be compeltely done, so that's great. That means you're free from getting her any more gifts for ANY occasion.
IF my fiance' can go no-contact w/ ALL 5 imemediate, narc fam members (both his (biological) parents & 3 sibs), anyoneone can get rid of 1 toxi person in their life.
Yes! I am free! I am going the way of your fiance'. No more contact with her. No more voice on the phone. She's on her own.
She IS an evil but(h and I do not need her toxic crap. I am very appreciative to you, and all who were supportive.
OMG & you bought her a LOT! But, being the evil, b____, narc that she is, I'm not surprised by her actions. But, why do you have to get her books or ANYTHING at all? She doesn't deserve a pile of s____ much less anything actually good. And she doesn't deserve to even hear your voice on the phone.
I'm kinda loving this post. It's so true. It never had anything to do with your gifts and everything to do with her asserting power over you.
"When people let you who they are, believe them" was really made for your situation!
I am only now calming down. I do not need this in my life.
My city-data adopted sister, here's a virtual hug! I really mean it. That's terrible what she said. How ungrateful. There's some problem with being spoiled, or feeling that she can guilt you, or both.
I'm more concerned for you, forget her. I hope you have managed to calm down. I know for me, something like this would eat away at me everytime I remembered it, and for a long time. When angry and hurt like this it helps me a little to remember that other people's actions reveal lots about them, and many times, has nothing to do with ourself. Several years ago someone threw some hateful words at me, but I remind myself--what was said to me revealed nothing about me in that harsh unfair judgment, but revealed much about the person who spoke such hateful words.
I'm kinda loving this post. It's so true. It never had anything to do with your gifts and everything to do with her asserting power over you.
"When people let you who they are, believe them" was really made for your situation!
Right! Send her a book on how to cure your own narcissistic personality disorder!
Ok, don't stoop to her level. Just fantasize about sending her such a book for a minute.
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