Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I try to put things in perspective. Ex. if I have a job interview coming up for a job that I want I'll try to think of what could happen. How if I get the job then it's great, but even if I don't get the job I'd be no worse off than I am now and hopefully another opportunity will come along. Also try to realize that worrying won't do any good but preparing to do my best is what I should strive for. Try to make the best of my situation because I only have one life to live and I can never turn back time so try to enjoy things now.
Heck, if it's something I'm really worried about and I can't think of solutions to ease my worry, my last resort is I just think about how I and everyone else alive today will be dead one day and none of it will matter. But of course that's a last resort, I try not to do that too often.
I like to tell myself that I'm worrying about bullsh**.
Take a couple of deep breaths and just focus on my surroundings, notice people, buildings, the sky.
So many reasons not to drown in worries. If it gets bad I just talk with friends or family.
For the past couple of years it has worked wonders and it gets easier as time goes by. ^^
Is it general anxiety or situation specific? If it's situation specific, I tell myself that what will be will be and no amount of worrying is going to change the outcome. There is no point in dwelling on something until you know what it is you're dealing with. If it's general anxiety, there are a lot of different ways to cope -a therapist or counselor can be of great help.
Is it general anxiety or situation specific? If it's situation specific, I tell myself that what will be will be and no amount of worrying is going to change the outcome. There is no point in dwelling on something until you know what it is you're dealing with. If it's general anxiety, there are a lot of different ways to cope -a therapist or counselor can be of great help.
You know the famous serenity prayer? “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot; the courage to change those I can and the wisdom to know the difference?” Right now I am stuck on the “wisdom to know the difference.”
Long story short, I am seeing a cataract surgeon who is insisting that I get a totally unnecessary and perhaps harmful pre-procedure physical. The procedure to remove a cataract takes about 10 minutes and invokes sedation, not general anesthesia. There is no reason whatsoever why a healthy 50+ year old needs a physical to know if she can tolerate it. (Beside, even if I couldn’t tolerate it for some reason, that is not likely to show up in a physical.) In fact all the professional ophthalmology organizations in the US recommend against such pre-procedure physicals. Pre-procedure physical started way way back in the 1950’s or even earlier when having cataracts removed was much more of a big deal than it has become. So, over the years the procedure has become much faster and safer, but old school doctors are still stuck with their 1950’s, 1960’s protocols.
So I am worried about seeing my PCP, particularly since I think it will only give me problems. I am adamantly opposed to over-testing and over-treatment. Since I haven’t seen my PCP in over two years, he is going to insist on a bunch of stuff that I don’t want to have done. We will have our argument, then hopefully he won’t do the stuff, but now I am worried that he is going to hold my (really unnecessry) pre-op physical papers hostage until I do whatever else he wants me to do.
I am worried that he will insist I go back to my electrophysiologist for the nuclear stress test said EP has frustratingly insisted I have and has written to my PCP about, although I do not need one. In fact, I regret ever having gone to a specialist for my palpitations. They turned out to be benign (not afib) and besides I figure out how to get rid of them on my own without medication. Yet, although I no longer have any cardiac symptoms, have normal blood pressure, have a low fat diet, have no heart disease in my family (even my obese aunt who only eats at McDonald’s doesn’t have heart disease, no one in large family has ever had a heart attack), run (not jog, but run 5x a week with no issues), and am slim (BMI 19), and still young (mid-50s) he is still absolutely insisting I get a nuclear stress test. When I pressed him on the matter, he admitted that it was “extremely unlikely” that I had coronary artery disease (any blockages), but I still needed to take this test. Why? I supposedly “need” it as a baseline for any future problems. So long story short, I absolutely do NOT need the test and he is full of *****. And yet, he has written to my PCP about this (or at least he threatened to sayings beg that I am neglecting my health).
Also, when I talked to the nurse about the nuclear stress test she told me that if it is positive, they will recommend an coronary catheterization with stenting if they find any blockages. This terrifies the ***** out of me because there is a huge false positive rate for stress tests (particularly high for women). I think the false positive rate is 40% or something like that. I mentioned that and she said that it was no problem is I had a false positive because they could just do the Catheterization which is a safe procedure. But I absolutely do not want the test in the first place, much less invasive heart procure for a false positive, much less an invasive heart procedure where they might stick hardware that I do not need in my arteries (the nurse went on to talk about possible stenting)
I guess I am really worried about it because I have already had a very bad experience with unnecessary before/overtreatment. I had recurrent diverticulitis and a bunch of GIs insisted that I needed to have some of my colon surgically removed to prevent it. I resisted for five years, but eventually agreed. I was told by the surgeon that the operation was going to be no big deal, laparoscopic, a quick 45 minute procedure. Well, NOT! I woke up 4 hours later. When the surgeon went in he said it looked “pretty messy,” so on the spot they decided to do a full open surgery and take out over a foot of my colon. Thankfully they stitched me back up, but their intervention which was supposed to be 99% effective, was NOT effective. The diverticulitis attack I had a few months after the surgery was the worst that I had ever had. A couple of years later, and after having been in and out of the hospital several more times with severe acute diverticulitis, I was told by my doctors and surgeons that they just didn’t know what was wrong with me and they weren’t going to see me anymore. Left to my own devices, I eventually tried probiotics, and miracle — probiotics completely solved my problem!
So, I am worried that this stupidly unnecessary pre-procedure physical will spiral down a similar stressful, time-wasting, health-jeopardizing rabbit hole.
I guess I could always find another cataract surgeon, but he is my 4th … the other 3 were unacceptable for a variety of other reasons. I am so so so so weary and do not want to set up a new patient appointment with a 5th cataract surgeon.
That is what I am worried/stressed about.
Do I ask for serenity to accept what I cannot change? Do I just go along with whatever my doctors say and if I go down a horrible rabbit hole just accept it?
Or do I ask for courage to change what I can change? Do I push back? But where’s the line? When do I start pushing back? Do I go on to my 5th cataract surgeon and risk everyone’s patience (I need people to drive me there and back) and let my rapidly progressive cataract progress further? Do I call the office and ask them why they are insisting on a physical that every professional ophthalmology organization is saying is unnecessary? If I do that, will they fire me as a patient? (I was fired by one ophthalmologist already for asking too many questions). Do I go to the physical and if my PCP refuses to sign off unless I do things I don’t want to do, then call the ophthalmologist’s office and ask if this is truly necessary?
I reschedule it. Intrusive worrying is very unproductive, and I hate the physical feeling of it. If it hits at an inconvenient time, like trying to sleep or do something at work, I tell myself that at a designated time I will fully indulge in a good session of worrying and problem-solving and then I do. Doing it that way, I can often see the solution, or at least steps I can take to mitigate and avoid a worst-case scenario.
Do something creative. I have noticed that when I am fully immersed in a creative activity or hobby all the worrying things that are trying to break into my thoughts dissipate. There is only so much space in the brain for creative thought and if it's put to work doing pleasant creative things, it has less space for creating unpleasant doomsday scenarios.
Clean things/organize things. Sometimes you get into a flow doing these mindless tasks and suddenly the true nature of what you are worried about, or a solution, will pop through even though you weren't really thinking about it.
No caffeine during worrying phases but plenty of caffeine in resolution stages when you're trying to act on things you thought of during your worrying session.
You know the famous serenity prayer? “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot; the courage to change those I can and the wisdom to know the difference?” Right now I am stuck on the “wisdom to know the difference.”
Long story short, I am seeing a cataract surgeon who is insisting that I get a totally unnecessary and perhaps harmful pre-procedure physical. The procedure to remove a cataract takes about 10 minutes and invokes sedation, not general anesthesia. There is no reason whatsoever why a healthy 50+ year old needs a physical to know if she can tolerate it. (Beside, even if I couldn’t tolerate it for some reason, that is not likely to show up in a physical.) In fact all the professional ophthalmology organizations in the US recommend against such pre-procedure physicals. Pre-procedure physical started way way back in the 1950’s or even earlier when having cataracts removed was much more of a big deal than it has become. So, over the years the procedure has become much faster and safer, but old school doctors are still stuck with their 1950’s, 1960’s protocols.
So I am worried about seeing my PCP, particularly since I think it will only give me problems. I am adamantly opposed to over-testing and over-treatment. Since I haven’t seen my PCP in over two years, he is going to insist on a bunch of stuff that I don’t want to have done. We will have our argument, then hopefully he won’t do the stuff, but now I am worried that he is going to hold my (really unnecessry) pre-op physical papers hostage until I do whatever else he wants me to do.
I am worried that he will insist I go back to my electrophysiologist for the nuclear stress test said EP has frustratingly insisted I have and has written to my PCP about, although I do not need one. In fact, I regret ever having gone to a specialist for my palpitations. They turned out to be benign (not afib) and besides I figure out how to get rid of them on my own without medication. Yet, although I no longer have any cardiac symptoms, have normal blood pressure, have a low fat diet, have no heart disease in my family (even my obese aunt who only eats at McDonald’s doesn’t have heart disease, no one in large family has ever had a heart attack), run (not jog, but run 5x a week with no issues), and am slim (BMI 19), and still young (mid-50s) he is still absolutely insisting I get a nuclear stress test. When I pressed him on the matter, he admitted that it was “extremely unlikely” that I had coronary artery disease (any blockages), but I still needed to take this test. Why? I supposedly “need” it as a baseline for any future problems. So long story short, I absolutely do NOT need the test and he is full of *****. And yet, he has written to my PCP about this (or at least he threatened to sayings beg that I am neglecting my health).
Also, when I talked to the nurse about the nuclear stress test she told me that if it is positive, they will recommend an coronary catheterization with stenting if they find any blockages. This terrifies the ***** out of me because there is a huge false positive rate for stress tests (particularly high for women). I think the false positive rate is 40% or something like that. I mentioned that and she said that it was no problem is I had a false positive because they could just do the Catheterization which is a safe procedure. But I absolutely do not want the test in the first place, much less invasive heart procure for a false positive, much less an invasive heart procedure where they might stick hardware that I do not need in my arteries (the nurse went on to talk about possible stenting)
I guess I am really worried about it because I have already had a very bad experience with unnecessary before/overtreatment. I had recurrent diverticulitis and a bunch of GIs insisted that I needed to have some of my colon surgically removed to prevent it. I resisted for five years, but eventually agreed. I was told by the surgeon that the operation was going to be no big deal, laparoscopic, a quick 45 minute procedure. Well, NOT! I woke up 4 hours later. When the surgeon went in he said it looked “pretty messy,” so on the spot they decided to do a full open surgery and take out over a foot of my colon. Thankfully they stitched me back up, but their intervention which was supposed to be 99% effective, was NOT effective. The diverticulitis attack I had a few months after the surgery was the worst that I had ever had. A couple of years later, and after having been in and out of the hospital several more times with severe acute diverticulitis, I was told by my doctors and surgeons that they just didn’t know what was wrong with me and they weren’t going to see me anymore. Left to my own devices, I eventually tried probiotics, and miracle — probiotics completely solved my problem!
So, I am worried that this stupidly unnecessary pre-procedure physical will spiral down a similar stressful, time-wasting, health-jeopardizing rabbit hole.
I guess I could always find another cataract surgeon, but he is my 4th … the other 3 were unacceptable for a variety of other reasons. I am so so so so weary and do not want to set up a new patient appointment with a 5th cataract surgeon.
That is what I am worried/stressed about.
Do I ask for serenity to accept what I cannot change? Do I just go along with whatever my doctors say and if I go down a horrible rabbit hole just accept it?
Or do I ask for courage to change what I can change? Do I push back? But where’s the line? When do I start pushing back? Do I go on to my 5th cataract surgeon and risk everyone’s patience (I need people to drive me there and back) and let my rapidly progressive cataract progress further? Do I call the office and ask them why they are insisting on a physical that every professional ophthalmology organization is saying is unnecessary? If I do that, will they fire me as a patient? (I was fired by one ophthalmologist already for asking too many questions). Do I go to the physical and if my PCP refuses to sign off unless I do things I don’t want to do, then call the ophthalmologist’s office and ask if this is truly necessary?
Yikes I can see why you are stressed. I can't help you make your decision but I find it helps to back it up and take it one step at a time. What is needed and what are your options for getting there? If all the options suck to some degree, find the one that causes the least amount of pain and make your peace with it.
I reschedule it. Intrusive worrying is very unproductive, and I hate the physical feeling of it. If it hits at an inconvenient time, like trying to sleep or do something at work, I tell myself that at a designated time I will fully indulge in a good session of worrying and problem-solving and then I do. Doing it that way, I can often see the solution, or at least steps I can take to mitigate and avoid a worst-case scenario.
Do something creative. I have noticed that when I am fully immersed in a creative activity or hobby all the worrying things that are trying to break into my thoughts dissipate. There is only so much space in the brain for creative thought and if it's put to work doing pleasant creative things, it has less space for creating unpleasant doomsday scenarios.
Clean things/organize things. Sometimes you get into a flow doing these mindless tasks and suddenly the true nature of what you are worried about, or a solution, will pop through even though you weren't really thinking about it.
No caffeine during worrying phases but plenty of caffeine in resolution stages when you're trying to act on things you thought of during your worrying session.
I like the rescheduling idea. I have done that before and in fact did that this morning, after having spent 10 minutes writing a profanity-laden prose poem to my doctors (which of course remain private and unsent).
“I have spent most of my life worrying about things that have never happened.” Mark Twain.
The person who wrote: no caffeine, be creative and clean something...is so right. I used to worry a lot in the past and I read a lot about what to do to get rid of this bad habit.
I also used and still use positive affirmations about courage. So, basically flip the bad habit in a new good habit. Instead of thinking and worrying, just concentrate on the opposite - on courage. It takes time but it works!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
