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Accepting the bad things that happen to you, rather than agonize and/or fume over them. Getting upset only makes you feel worse, and in no way changes what's happening to you.
It's not a sin or mark of bad character if you are upset, hurt, traumatized, or experiencing mental illness. Good people won't judge you for that. Everyone else can go jump in a lake.
I don't know that I was given this wisdom so much as it came to me and set me free in ways I hadn't quite imagined I needed to be freed. If it helps anyone else - wonderful. If not - discard it immediately and think of it no more.
"There is no meaning and no purpose to life.
No one is missing out on their destiny or fate.
Life just is - until it isn't.
The only meaning & purpose to any of this life is that which we ascribe to it.
We are the gods of our own making.
We live until we die and then we are done.
Live - not everyone gets the option."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jill_Schramm
The title says it all:
What was the most life-changing piece of psychological advice or words of wisdom you have ever received.
For me:
”If you are wondering what people are thinking about you, don’t worry, they aren’t”
In October 1976 I was a sophomore at Cornell, I visited a close friend at Yale, where he attended. I was, socially, not having a great time of it at Cornell, to put it mildly. We were both 19 at the time. After attending the Yale-Cornell game, and seeing Earth Wind & Fire with him and his college suite-mates, I felt I needed to ask his advice on a number of deeply personal matters. Note, I did not do this with him while we were in high school together (though our friendship started with a brief, sharp, semi-psychological dressing down about my sarcasm on certain topics) and I did not ask college friends for that advice. Even the best among us cannot keep a secret so I like to keep my advice requests at a distance.
I basically asked him "what was I doing wrong" socially. He said "Jim (my first name as well as his), I see lots of problems." His basic advice that night was never to make it obvious I was "nervous." Nine months later, when he as handing off a part-time temp job to me, he gave me other advice on approaches to starting conversations.
He has remained a close friend over most of the fifty+ years I have known him.
When someone tells you who they are, believe them.
I first learned of this advice in a book written by a journalist based upon letters from an older family member who left Germany just before WWll.. cannot remember name of book or author.. The family member was a Jewish, medical doctor and set up practice in Pittsfield MA after he left Germany. He left bc he could see the writing on the wall. When he was in the process of preparing to leave Germany, other family members tried to get him to stay.. He just kept telling them "When someone tells you who they are, believe them"
When someone tells you who they are, believe them.
I first learned of this advice in a book written by a journalist based upon letters from an older family member who left Germany just before WWll.. cannot remember name of book or author.. The family member was a Jewish, medical doctor and set up practice in Pittsfield MA after he left Germany. He left bc he could see the writing on the wall. When he was in the process of preparing to leave Germany, other family members tried to get him to stay.. He just kept telling them "When someone tells you who they are, believe them"
This really stuck with me. It is good advice.
I'd like you to find the name of this doctor. The quote is attributed to Maya Angelou. I have my doubts.
“It's not your job to like me - it's mine.” ― Byron Katie
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