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You added a lot of unneccessary information in your post so let me clear it up for you.
"Hi, I've been in a 2 year relationship and have decided I want to have sex with other people. How do I break the news to my SO?"
Just tell him and tell him it's ok if he wants to have sex with other people too and that you want to have an open relationship. Case closed.
That kind of reaction is what I want to avoid.Its not that I don't love him or have lost interest.I just want to enjoy something a new and different every once in awhile with his permission of course.I will totally respect his decision whatever it may be.
you and he might think this is a HOT idea, but this is now the begining of the end of your relationship. Early in my first relationship, my X got curious and so I let her get with another woman...yeah it was everything it could be, and more....
That was 21 years ago, Ive been divorced for 20 years now. It just opened up pandoras box.
you and he might think this is a HOT idea, but this is now the begining of the end of your relationship. Early in my first relationship, my X got curious and so I let her get with another woman...yeah it was everything it could be, and more....
That was 21 years ago, Ive been divorced for 20 years now. It just opened up pandoras box.
That is a very valid point.However I could never picture myself with another man and I am committed to making what we have continue to work.I would never go against his wishes but a tiny little voice inside me doesn't want to be left wondering what if.
ok ok to give you some real advice, this is not the place to ask this. You should look on a Dom/sub forum for advice. You're gonna spend more time explaining the basics of your lifestyle than getting informed advice.
edit: also, when you go to a Dom/sub forum for advice, it will be helpful to tell whether you are the Domme or sub in the relationship and get your capitalization and terms right. If you don't, you might annoy people.
In hindsight you are probably right but I couldn't work up the nerve to go to my usual forums for fear of what they might think as my SO and I have well established accounts on most of those sites.So I settled for here which appears to be a pretty non-judgemental place to ask a question.
In hindsight you are probably right but I couldn't work up the nerve to go to my usual forums for fear of what they might think as my SO and I have well established accounts on most of those sites.So I settled for here which appears to be a pretty non-judgemental place to ask a question.
Understandable. If everyone knows you two on those forums that'd be a bad idea. But this isn't really that non-judgemental of a place. Even regular "equal power", straight, fwb is mostly frowned upon.. pretty much anything non-vanilla is, at best, not understood.
I would say to ask him. And of course tell him that you know he is in control of every single minor detail of it. I honestly don't know much about day-to-day Dom/sub relationships as far as speaking, decision making, etc And I don't know the demeanor of your SO. So it could blow up in your face or he might be all about it. ?
If you want to delve in girl/girl play ( -minus the relationship part with your bf- ) then it should NOT be a friend .
It should be an aquaintence.
The reason : She is your friend . What if this got sticky ? What if you bf jumped in the fray and you got mad at BOTH of them ?
Its just not worth it to sleep with a friend.
How come you never told your bf you had bi~tendancies ?
He is at a disadvantage here.
Now you have to contend with his opinion( good or bad ) about your attraction to girls...
Sorry , this is WAY too important ..and should have been discussed with your bf in the beginning of your Relationship...
You can't backtrack here on this one...
You either forget about her and the moi~na_za~Toi ( sp , lol ) or tell him and risk losing him...
I have never wanted to try girl/girl relations with anyone other than my friend.I am not the type for casual sexual relations with people that I have no connection to.
I never told my BF because I never thought it would be an issue.I had no idea that my friend felt the same way towards me and having no desire for other females I never thought it would be an issue.
You are right about having to contend with his opinion.I will respect his wishes regardless if I like them or not.I love him and would never do something that he forbid me to.
I am not worried about him leaving me over my feelings because he knows that I would never disobey him in such a fashion.What I am worried about is him limiting my visits with her as her SO and my SO are best friends and see each other on a twice a week basis and my ability to see her is limited to him allowing me to.
Understandable. If everyone knows you two on those forums that'd be a bad idea. But this isn't really that non-judgemental of a place. Even regular "equal power", straight, fwb is mostly frowned upon.. pretty much anything non-vanilla is, at best, not understood.
I would say to ask him. And of course tell him that you know he is in control of every single minor detail of it. I honestly don't know much about day-to-day Dom/sub relationships as far as speaking, decision making, etc And I don't know the demeanor of your SO. So it could blow up in your face or he might be all about it. ?
I am not familiar with fwb.What does that stand for?
It is a good thing to get the opinions of those who are no in the lifestyle because I think I might just be blowing this out of proportion and that he will be fine with it.I just don't like the idea of potentially being punished if I tell him.However I may have cut my own throat because with her SO knowing and him and my SO being best friends the odds are good that if I don't tell him that he will bring it up to him and that would really be a disaster.
The other Masters I have heard him speaking with when I am allowed to be present for such conversations let their Subs enter into such relationships and I never heard or sem him reject or balk at such an idea.I just want to find a creative way to ask him if I could have such privileges and what kind of reactions I can expect.
Well, there you go:
"Master, may I"
Master, may I have the privilidge to partake in the delicate feast of another woman? You forever hold my heart, nevertheless, I would like to share my flesh with this woman to quench my longing curiosity. Shall I prepare the room for our experience?
oh good grief, this thread is worse than the Penthouse Forum
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