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sending an excess of messages at such an early stage in the relationship might lead this person to think that you don't trust him, and yes, that would push him away.Try and think very highly of YOURSELF, and tell yourself what a good catch you'd be..Let him contact you,remember , if he doesn't then HE'S the one that lost out on a good thing, above all, love yourself so that others can love you too.
I will definitely try that. But it just seems so hard to change your mindset by just saying that to yourself. Is it actually constructive??
ABSOLUTELY,Don't just say it to yourself..BELIEVE IT....You are a goddess, You are special,You are beautiful, HE is lucky if you allow him to take you out!!!
I'm quick to attach to people and don't know why... or how to fix it! Can you please help!?
I have just realized this about myself in the last couple days. Since I was 18, I've had 4 relationships, but mainly single the past 2.5yrs, with few close friends. It has always been a struggle for me to maintain friendships longer than 3-6months, as I feel them pull away, and I try harder.
Growing up: I have 6 brothers and I'm the only girl - right in the middle. My mom wasn't a "mom" much, as she was working, or going to school, hanging out with friends, in her room. When I was a teenager, my younger brothers had nicknamed her "IM" for Invisible Mom - because she was never there, and when she was you didn't know it bc she was in her room. My Dad worked on and off and had several small business attempts. My 2nd oldest brother was always controlling and sometimes abusive. No one stood up to him except my Dad. But when he wasn't home, I became the parent and protected my brothers.
Between ages 9-16, we moved 6 times, and I went to 2 schools each for Elementary, Jr. High and H.S. Age 12 my parents got divorced, and my mom got remarried. At 15 my mom and stepdad were divorced, and my Dad had passed away.
This realization is so new to me, I'm not really sure where to start. I've been pretty lonely, and I'd like to take ownership of whatever I can to improve my life. A new partner sounds lovely, but if there are things I need to do in my life first - I want to do whatever I can to set myself up for success. Does anyone have any insight or thoughts to offer?
Another old post. OP hopefully you've learned by now the power of self control. Don't text, don't text when drunk. Just send a short message here and there. It's hard when you meet someone new you like. (I'm going through this now.) but you must control yourself and respect the other person's pace of moving things forward.
Another old post. OP hopefully you've learned by now the power of self control. Don't text, don't text when drunk. Just send a short message here and there. It's hard when you meet someone new you like. (I'm going through this now.) but you must control yourself and respect the other person's pace of moving things forward.
Typically they do set the pace, but then it's a quick pull back as well. Then I get thrown off guard and start doubting things. How much and for how long should i be holding back?
That depends on so many things. I believe the man should take the lead. But no one should smother another person. If a person pulls back, let them and they should return when they are comfortable. Many things can be interpreted as pulling back when they in fact are not. I started dating someone new and instead of going on a 3rd date with him on my night off, I met with a friend. He asked some questions about it so I felt he had some concerns. So though I normally do not text men, I texted him the next couple of times to let him know I was interested and not just making an excuse to not go out with him. Then when he asked again, I accepted and we had a pretty good date.
I also get thrown off guard, nervous , and say dumb things (talk too much) when I like someone. This is normal, reacting to someone you like pulling back or just realizing you like someone and being thrown off guard. If someone says no without explanation to 2 invitations, I'd be worried. 3 is definitely a pattern. But besides thing like this, or not answering texts, try not to doubt. It's important to focus on the positive so you don't let your fears ruin something good. Be confident.
You come on fast and leave fast = commitment phobia.
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I'm quick to attach to people and don't know why... or how to fix it! Can you please help!?
