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Several of my friends were sitting around chatting, and then the topic of relationships came up. One of my female friends remarked that girls like it when you start out as friends first and then go into a relationship. How much truth is to this statement? Is it something that varies from girl to girl? Is it something that a majority of girls agree with?
I just ask because, well, I'm not the most confident person and have only asked out friends in the past. Even when I thought that something was there, some sort of spark, it didn't work out. The girl invariably doesn't feel the same way. Maybe it's because I'm just really bad at reading signals. Maybe it's because I don't know how to make myself look attractive to girls (although, I just act as myself).
Several of my friends were sitting around chatting, and then the topic of relationships came up. One of my female friends remarked that girls like it when you start out as friends first and then go into a relationship. How much truth is to this statement? Is it something that varies from girl to girl? Is it something that a majority of girls agree with?
I just ask because, well, I'm not the most confident person and have only asked out friends in the past. Even when I thought that something was there, some sort of spark, it didn't work out. The girl invariably doesn't feel the same way. Maybe it's because I'm just really bad at reading signals. Maybe it's because I don't know how to make myself look attractive to girls (although, I just act as myself).
man i just don't understand guys on here. all they talk about is being turned down. i'm 49 and spent most of my adult life married so i haven't dated much. proably 5 girls in high school. 3 or 4 between H.S. and my 1st marriage and 6 or 7 between marriages. i ain't trying to sound like something special but i was never gunned down. i guess i was one of the cute guys in H.S. but after 18 years in my 1st marriage i was overweight and balding but still wasn't told "no" at all before i met my current wife. of course she said "yes" too.
you'll have to take my word for it that these were not unattractive women and i think my standards were fairly high. to me my wife is an absolute knockout and i'm the luckiest man on here.
so if i do the math i asked about 15 ( i know that's not many) or so women out in my life and they all said "yes" and i'm just a regular guy.
WTH are you guys doing????????? i just can't believe it when i read this stuff on here.
Just ask. Who cares if they are a friend or not. If they are a friend lucky you. If they aren't a friend than they will be shortly. I can talk to anyone though and don't understand why others can't. So your not confident, the girl doesn't know that. Pretend that you are confident. I have read that women like a confident guy that knows what he wants. My wife is like that. At times when I have wavered on a weekend lets say and didn't know where we should go she would tell me to be a man and make up my mind. Sure she is joking around but many women do want you to have a back bone. Maybe you need to act like you have one.
WTH are you guys doing????????? i just can't believe it when i read this stuff on here.
I don't know! I have several girl friends, I'm fairly intelligent, dress well, I'm not bad looking (or so I've heard), and have a good sense of humor... but I've just had zero luck so far.
Maybe it's as soon2bn said, that I need to at least create the veneer of greater confidence. But, at the same time, I don't feel like I'm generating an aura of a lack of confidence either.
I don't know! I have several girl friends, I'm fairly intelligent, dress well, I'm not bad looking (or so I've heard), and have a good sense of humor... but I've just had zero luck so far.
Maybe it's as soon2bn said, that I need to at least create the veneer of greater confidence. But, at the same time, I don't feel like I'm generating an aura of a lack of confidence either.
the 1st thing i thought was a lack of confidence and then you brought it up so there might be something to it. are you asking out girls that are out of your league? also don't try using corny lines and stuff, just plain old ask em out to dinner or a movie.
I don't know! I have several girl friends, I'm fairly intelligent, dress well, I'm not bad looking (or so I've heard), and have a good sense of humor... but I've just had zero luck so far.
Maybe it's as soon2bn said, that I need to at least create the veneer of greater confidence. But, at the same time, I don't feel like I'm generating an aura of a lack of confidence either.
Do yourself a favor...ask your closest friend to be brutally honest with you and tell you what THEY see when they look at you.
I know you said you don't feel like you are putting out a vibe of no self confidence, but that may not be true okay? Let someone who knows you well help you with this
Oh, and some great romances do start out as friendships, but not all - not even most.
That only works if ur like some brad pit or extremely attractive dude. For an average guy it isn't a good idea to start of at friends because 99% of the times u will end up being stuck in the friend zone.
Several of my friends were sitting around chatting, and then the topic of relationships came up. One of my female friends remarked that girls like it when you start out as friends first and then go into a relationship. How much truth is to this statement? Is it something that varies from girl to girl? Is it something that a majority of girls agree with?
I just ask because, well, I'm not the most confident person and have only asked out friends in the past. Even when I thought that something was there, some sort of spark, it didn't work out. The girl invariably doesn't feel the same way. Maybe it's because I'm just really bad at reading signals. Maybe it's because I don't know how to make myself look attractive to girls (although, I just act as myself).
Would you want to be a friend with someone you were in a relationship with?
If your answer is no, then what's the point of having a relationship in the first place?
That only works if ur like some brad pit or extremely attractive dude. For an average guy it isn't a good idea to start of at friends because 99% of the times u will end up being stuck in the friend zone.
Agreed. There has to be sparks, chemistry with initial attraction. Friendship comes later and grows over time
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