Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Sorry, there is not "Psychology" forum here, so I'll just stick in the forum I'm usually in. That and it sort of deals with relationships and society.
As a child, I was really outgoing, always chatting with everyone around. My mouth would always get me into trouble. I could not stop talking. I literally could go on a trip to my grandparents and talk for the entire six hours it took to get there.
As soon as I hit the age of thirteen, I changed entirely. I talked a lot less. I don't ever really have the urge to talk to anyone. I have friends and function just fine in social situations, although I'm usually fairly quiet, unless it's a conversation in which I can share a lot of input. Basically, I became fairly introverted. It wasn't something I decided to become, it just happened. I'm thirty now and still the same. The only thing that happened out of the ordinary around that time was my parents getting divorced and having to move in with my grandparents, far from where I originally lived. But, I hardly think that would be the reason for a personality change.
I'm just curious, but has anyone else changed that drastically from childhood to adulthood? Or have you gone the opposite direction?
This happened to me. I just figured that people put up with children who talk a lot and then when you are older, not so much.
I was an extrovert. The word "shy" was never used to describe me.
Unfortunately, it got me in trouble a lot in school as I always wanted to talk to my friends.
I never wanted to be the "center of attention" though. I don't like the spotlight on me. Never have. I'm glad to let the "me, me, me" people have that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20
I'm more the opposite. I was a shy child, although from ages 8-13 I could be chatty about things that interested me. When I started high school things went down hill for awhile - I was shyer than ever - but then I got out of my shell a little in late high school. I still haven't completely 'bloomed' so to speak, but I can be quite extroverted when I want to. You can't change a tiger's stripes, however, and I'll always be an introvert who enjoys doing solitary things while needing to occasionally socialise.
I really am not fond of it when people use shy and introverted interchangeably.
Introversion is a preference for low sociability.
Shyness is anxiety or fear of being social.
Just an annoyance of mine when people assume that one goes with the other.
It does a disservice to people who can easily have one feature and not the other.
I am and was an introvert and as a kid I was never shy about making my voice heard, even controversial views or blunt statements about others, (to the point where many adults, including teachers thought of me as a problem kid) and my best friend in high school said I could never shut up when I got going . Yet when I don't want to talk, or don't want to socialize, I won't. Plain and simple.
I really am not fond of it when people use shy and introverted interchangeably.
Introversion is a preference for low sociability.
Shyness is anxiety or fear of being social.
Just an annoyance of mine when people assume that one goes with the other.
It does a disservice to people who can easily have one feature and not the other.
I am and was an introvert and as a kid I was never shy about making my voice heard, even controversial views or blunt statements about others, (to the point where many adults, including teachers thought of me as a problem kid) and my best friend in high school said I could never shut up when I got going . Yet when I don't want to talk, or don't want to socialize, I won't. Plain and simple.
Okay, cool, but why did you highlight MY post.
Are you "agreeing" or "disagreeing" with me? I can't tell.
Are you "agreeing" or "disagreeing" with me? I can't tell.
Yeah, it probably wasn't necessary, and I didn't mean to respond to any line but I kept seeing posts with "shy" and wanted to remind to make sure people knew the distinction.
I just highlighted a bunch of posts with "shy" in them and wanted to say something like "remember, shy isn't the same as introverted"; I wasn't thinking much...lol.
But it's fair and true in the sense that introverts can be described by people as shy by looking at behaviour alone (whether that description is accurate or mistaken).
Yeah, it probably wasn't necessary, and I didn't mean to respond to any line but I kept seeing posts with "shy" and wanted to remind to make sure people knew the distinction.
I just highlighted a bunch of posts with "shy" in them and wanted to say something like "remember, shy isn't the same as introverted"; I wasn't thinking much...lol.
But it's fair and true in the sense that introverts can be described by people as shy by looking at behaviour alone (whether that description is accurate or mistaken).
Sorry, there is not "Psychology" forum here, so I'll just stick in the forum I'm usually in. That and it sort of deals with relationships and society.
As a child, I was really outgoing, always chatting with everyone around. My mouth would always get me into trouble. I could not stop talking. I literally could go on a trip to my grandparents and talk for the entire six hours it took to get there.
As soon as I hit the age of thirteen, I changed entirely. I talked a lot less. I don't ever really have the urge to talk to anyone. I have friends and function just fine in social situations, although I'm usually fairly quiet, unless it's a conversation in which I can share a lot of input. Basically, I became fairly introverted. It wasn't something I decided to become, it just happened. I'm thirty now and still the same. The only thing that happened out of the ordinary around that time was my parents getting divorced and having to move in with my grandparents, far from where I originally lived. But, I hardly think that would be the reason for a personality change.
I'm just curious, but has anyone else changed that drastically from childhood to adulthood? Or have you gone the opposite direction?
I went the other way. I was a painfully shy kid on top of being introverted. ("Introverted" and "shy" are two very different things.) But when I got to high school, I became quite extroverted, and remained that way through my 20s. I would usually test ENTJ, although the E was usually on a 70/30 or 65/35 margin. Strong, but not bandleader, take-over-the-world strong.
Some of it may be that I was a skinny kid and really self-conscious about it. So the introversion was compounded by shyness. But when you get to high school (Catholic grade school goes to 8th grade), and your grade is 10 times larger than the year before (500 kinds vs. 50), "skinny" becomes an asset and suddenly everyone talks to you. Make enough friends, get invited to enough parties, and have enough boys ask you out in addition to getting good grades, and not only are you not so self-conscious anymore, you're part of a "scene" that fosters extroversion. I was still a student newspaper/yearbook/lit mag kind of kid though. Just couldn't bring myself to do the cheerleading thing although the nun in charge of it tried to get me to try out every year. I wanted to watch the football games, not have my back to them the whole time. And I wasn't the one to have the parties.
As I settled into my career--writing and editing--my introversion came back. Again, environment: My work requires solitude and the ability to sit back and process information internally, and it fosters the introversion I was born with. So now it's back to introversion, but without the shyness this time. INTJ, but 65/35, or 60/40.
This same thing happened to me and also to a friend of mine. We were both loud extroverted kids. I was even more so than her- I loved the spotlight and was always performing, always wanted to put on plays for people and sing & dance etc, and I was always talking. I have always been a creative kid, and am still a very creative adult, but the difference in how I expressed it changed when I was around 14- I became very closed-in, dark minded, and insecure for a while as a teenager. I went from wanting peoples attention, to wanting to avoid the spotlight all together. My creativity switched to introverted outlets like art and creative writing, and i never went back - as an adult I am the same way. I have always had friends, but prefer one on one or small groups, and I always need time to myself to recooperate in between. As an adult I never want any attention on me, and would fear the very spotlight I craved as a kid. My friend is an even more introverted adult, and when we were discussing this she realized her ‘shift’ came around the time she was bullied in adolescence. I was not bullied as much as her, but I did have others who liked to ‘pick me apart’ throughout growing up. So it’s possible we both withdrew into a different comfort zone as we saw the social world is not always (or rarely, in some circles) to be trusted. This is just a theory - we do both enjoy alone time as adults, rather than feeling particularly lonely as true extroverts would. But an interesting thought.
I was an extremely extrovert child and young adolescent and was always in trouble as a result.
My extroverted nature began to change after a traumatic experience I had that involved putting a close family member in the hospital that nearly ended their life and put them through years of extended pain and suffering.
While it was an accident we both played a part in, it affected me in a manner I had no control over. The situation and everything surrounding it compounded on to me emotionally and my brain shut itself off from the trauma since it could not comprehend everything happening to me or the feelings I was having.
I pulled away from people, I found it hard to relate to people and the desire to feel wanted and important diminished as a result. The experience fundamentally changed who I was and my behavior followed it.
Seriously, it was a role I took on in early childhood to mask how deathly afraid I was of being in the world. This continued into my adult years and has become even more of a defence mechanism since I've been on my own without immediate family. As I age, I find it more draining to paint on my game face and put myself out there but the show must go on, darlings.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
