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I think ever since I hit that 30 mark and still single, dating has taken a hard turn.
Well, I spent the time period of 24-30 in 2 back to back relationships... so, I'm not sure how that period would have been.
But, has anybody else just have trouble dating? I am never married, no kids, and just hit my 30s...I'm finding it harder and harder to find decent women, I'm sure it is hard for the women to find guys also.
I am not really the type to "settle" or just date anybody so eh... I think I might wind up like Seinfeld or something. That is how I feel. And it isn't so much as there are faults with these people, there just isn't much to choose from, and the quality of potential candidates I remember before was MUCH better.
So who out there can relate?
I just NOW in the past couple of months found a really decent and responsible man. I am 43, been out there trying for many years. It IS hard to meet people organically anymore, certainly. What I found most often were men in arrested development. For example, men in their 30's with no furniture, minimally employed, a lack of concern about commitment or what it takes to be a good partner for another.
To find someone with your same fundamentals is hard, but do not settle just because it takes time.
The problem is not always that there were better candidates to choose from before-it is that many of the people your age are married. Add to that the fact that we aren't in college where tons of others are. We work hard all day and are not meeting in the world as we did when we were younger and out-and-about.
I just NOW in the past couple of months found a really decent and responsible man. I am 43, been out there trying for many years. It IS hard to meet people organically anymore, certainly. What I found most often were men in arrested development. For example, men in their 30's with no furniture, minimally employed, a lack of concern about commitment or what it takes to be a good partner for another.
To find someone with your same fundamentals is hard, but do not settle just because it takes time.
The problem is not always that there were better candidates to choose from before-it is that many of the people your age are married. Add to that the fact that we aren't in college where tons of others are. We work hard all day and are not meeting in the world as we did when we were younger and out-and-about.
Yeah that is true, I'm not in those massive social circles that college provided anymore. My work colleagues are also mostly all married.
Why make it any harder then it already is. Age 30 and single should just look for sex partners, and stop pretending to be 15 year olds, going out on dates, and trying to be cool. Just dress up nice, do a AIDS test, and get naked already. That sloves everybody problems. If you like what you see, maybe we could do it again, and again, and again. No more of this game nonsense, just go out their and show some leg, and get some attention.
I just have to chuckle at the obvious culture differences between where the OP lives (Austin, TX) and where I live (NYC). Apparently, it is still the 1960's in that region of the country and if you aren't married by 30 you are damaged goods.
In NYC, I'd say unmarried people at age 30 is very common. In fact, I don't know many people in their twenties who are married.
I just have to chuckle at the obvious culture differences between where the OP lives (Austin, TX) and where I live (NYC). Apparently, it is still the 1960's in that region of the country and if you aren't married by 30 you are damaged goods.
In NYC, I'd say unmarried people at age 30 is very common. In fact, I don't know many people in their twenties who are married.
Move.
LOL! So true! Twenties are the new teenage years......
Well, the older we get, the less good chances we have.... And yes, it's harder to find matches than at 20.... BUT
I would say that 30 is a prime of life! It's a perfect time to find another adult and hook up with them...
Before 30, people are more immature and at 30 they finally grow up...
So, like someone else said, because of so many divorces and break ups, 30 still should be a great age to find someone.
I am 37... and when I look at guys, 30 almost seems "too young" (I mean immature), so you're still in between the young and the older... you could choose for both pools (younger and older women)
30-35 - people still look good usually
Last edited by LoveWisdom; 03-27-2012 at 01:25 PM..
I agree. I'm 32 and have found it's more difficult to date now than it was in my 20s. There seem to be fewer available fish, particularly ones with no baggage. I refuse to date a man with kids, and I hesitate to date a guy who's divorced. Since I have never been married, have no kids, am financially secure, and made it a point to make smart life choices, I refuse to settle for someone who's not at least somewhat similar.
I'm attractive, in great shape, have traveled, am educated and have a good personality, so I can't figure out why it's so difficult to meet and connect with similar men. There was one guy who I liked and met most of my criteria, but he wasn't interested in me. My friend (who set us up) said he has unrealistic expectations though, so maybe that was more about him than me. Anyway, yes, it does seem more complicated now than a few years ago.
I wouldn't say it is harder, but it is different. I'll be 36 this year, and yeah it is a lot different than when I was 20, but in some aspects it is easier, because I know what I want and it seems women my age know what they want as well. However, actually getting the oppurtunity to meet people seems harder. Not many clubs that I like, plus I have a busy work schedule, and most women my age have kids, so it's hard to schedule a date right away sometimes. But there were just as many frustrations with dating when I was younger, just different frustrations.
the males that's out there in this age group only want fu*k buddies or FWB, anything where it's as easy for them as possible to 'get some' without having to do much more. they always say they don't want serious relationships or marriage...probably b/c they require too much effort. I seen it over and over again.
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