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Seriously, I don't "date" women who are cool with ten guys taking them out all at once. If I find that out after the fact, I'll get down the road leaving a cloud of black diesel smoke.
How many women really do this.. lol. Even the really hot ones that I know aren't doing this
I personally like how it is here in the US. It's nice that it is laid back and you can just take a girl out without having to worry about being exclusive after the first date?? I don't know about you guys but to me that doesn't sound appealing. I'd much rather go out with a bunch of girls and get to know them like that.
Something seems rather odd to me about this whole thing. How can you approach a girl and ask her out if you have to be exclusive for her to even say yes? I feel like something is being embellished here.
You're much younger than I am. You have plenty of time. Us old farts are looking for a wife.
You're much younger than I am. You have plenty of time. Us old farts are looking for a wife.
Hm, I actually thought you were in your 20s this whole time haha. I guess if I was really looking for a wife I might have a different outlook on dating. Right now fixing my golf handicap is more important than a wife though!!
Hm, I actually thought you were in your 20s this whole time haha. I guess if I was really looking for a wife I might have a different outlook on dating. Right now fixing my golf handicap is more important than a wife though!!
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,068,476 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope
You guys may not know this, but "dating" as you know it is almost exclusively American.
Downunder, we "see" someone. By this I mean, someone who likesyou in that way will ask you out. If you like them in that way, you accept.
This has changed a little bit, thanks to internet dating, but essentially it is an unspoken rule that you are together if the date is repeated or successful, and by together I mean, exclusive, with all the relationship responsibilities that come with that.
Americans treat dating more like window shopping, by which I mean you tend to date a lot of different people, with no expectations or commitments, often no physical contact!
The essential difference is you guys decide if you want a relationship AFTER the date, where as we decide we want one BEFORE the date. A girl would not accept a date from a guy she wasn't hot for, and vice versa.
I'm not saying one is better or worse, just that there is a difference which is a CONSTANT source of amusement for me, especially when someone gets on CD and says "we didn't get to first base" or "what does this mean?". In Aus, there are no doubts. If he's spending money on you, you've got him...and he assumes you want him.
It certainly saves a lot of misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and forum questions!
I'm Australian too as you know.
I disagree, how would you know if you like someone before you spend some one on one times with them? I've only been on a few dates with girls I've met online. None of them lead to anything, and nothing happened on the date, but the idea of being 'exclusive' or 'dating' after just two dates seems pretty foreign to me. It depends on the relationship, but usually it will take usually 3-4 'dates' for two people to decide they want to be serious. I also disagree that it's a 'done deal' with regards to having sex. Maybe that's how it works out with you, but like anywhere in the WORLD, men take women out, spend money on them, and she still might say no thanks, or I'm not interested. Australia isn't THAT much different to the US as you think, although I've not dated in the States.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,068,476 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope
And THAT seems odd to ME.
Why would you ask ANY girl out when you're interested in another?
As I said, a date has a signifcance here that it does not carry in the US. A date is for when you already know her, already like her, think she likes you, and you both want to take things further.
I doubt we date as often as you guys...certainly not as many people, that's for sure.
The dynamics for my generation are very different. Since internet dating is so prevalent, we often go on dates with people we barely know. We may know them from an internet profile, or chatting briefly online. We arrange a date to get to know each other, find out if we click, obviously with no expectation that anything will definitely happen. I wish I could meet more women the 'old fashioned way' through friends, but I don't socialize much these days and it can take awhile doing this to find somebody you're into.
I always found the idea of saying 'we're dating' or 'we're going out' as in we're a couple strange. To me, dating is the initial stage, where people get to know each other. Once you're a couple I don't really see it as dating but just spending time together as a couple.
I disagree, how would you know if you like someone before you spend some one on one times with them? I've only been on a few dates with girls I've met online. None of them lead to anything, and nothing happened on the date, but the idea of being 'exclusive' or 'dating' after just two dates seems pretty foreign to me. It depends on the relationship, but usually it will take usually 3-4 'dates' for two people to decide they want to be serious. I also disagree that it's a 'done deal' with regards to having sex. Maybe that's how it works out with you, but like anywhere in the WORLD, men take women out, spend money on them, and she still might say no thanks, or I'm not interested. Australia isn't THAT much different to the US as you think, although I've not dated in the States.
Check out the goings on of "sex and the city"...they are always dating this guy or that, no kiss, nothing...sometimes they even SHAKE HANDS.
THAT DOES NOT HAPPEN IN AUSTRALIA...a woman may well agree to go somewhere with a man as a "friend" but you can bet your bottom dollar she's paying her own way and goes OUT OF HER WAY to broadcast that she's not interested in him, in that way, if so.
I don't know how long you've been over there but we do not, and never have, gone for the serial friendly date type scenario as Americans do it. A date is significant here. In America, it's Saturday Night.
If a woman lets a man take her out and spend money on her, she's interested. It has zero to do with what stage you have sex.
I disagree, how would you know if you like someone before you spend some one on one times with them? I've only been on a few dates with girls I've met online. None of them lead to anything, and nothing happened on the date, but the idea of being 'exclusive' or 'dating' after just two dates seems pretty foreign to me. It depends on the relationship, but usually it will take usually 3-4 'dates' for two people to decide they want to be serious. I also disagree that it's a 'done deal' with regards to having sex. Maybe that's how it works out with you, but like anywhere in the WORLD, men take women out, spend money on them, and she still might say no thanks, or I'm not interested. Australia isn't THAT much different to the US as you think, although I've not dated in the States.
actually She's from NZ, living in Australia.
I also do not agree with the idea of exclusivity after one date, nor that its a done deal to have sex.
I also do not agree with the idea of exclusivity after one date, nor that its a done deal to have sex.
How do you know the status of my citizenship?
I'm an Australian Citizen thank you very much.
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