Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
i responded to the previous couple of texts even though they were sent late at night and probably under the influence. with the first one i asked what his business plan was and then wished him good luck. he said thanks and sent me a smiley face. didn't hear from him until the 3 am "how're you?" i responded simply with a "lol. partying hard i see"
a couple of weeks later i was upset and wanted to just talk to him so i called him. he doesnt pick up of course, so i send him a tetx " can you please return my call when you're free. i promise i don't bite; )" no response until a week later on a sat night where he goes "hey my phone has been acting weird. just got your messages from last week. you okay"
i took his very late response to be a blow off and simply texted back "oh technology" and didn't say much else and didnt hear back from him until this past saturday evening at 2 am where he textes me after 2 months of abruptly disappearing on me. "hey so you're probably mad at me but i just want to tell you that i miss you and i hope things are good for you and i miss you".
I dont actively respond until one night about a month ago he drunk calls me. i had deleted his number and didnt know it was him so i pick up and say hello? he hangs up on me. he calls again and i pick up and ask "hello? is this ___" he hangs up again. befuddled and amused i try to go back to sleep but then the barrage of drunk texts arrive. "sorry to wake you. but i was thinking about you" "i miss you so much and cant stop thinking about you!" "i dream about you all the time!" "i hope you are well and if you're with someone else i hope he worships you like i do!" "no man will ever miss you like i do!"
at this point i text back " drink some water and go to bed!"
he texts back " sorry to wake you. i miss you and wanted to apologize for what happened."
i text back "why did you disappear?"
"because i was a ****ing idiot. i had forgotten what it was like to be with someone good and true and i got scared"
i dont respond and go to sleep. midweek he sends me a long apology email saying he feels ****ty for what happened and that he misses me.he got paralyzed and didnt know what to do because he wasnt over his break up the way he thought he was. he begs me to "make room for him in my heart" and he would like it if we could talk.
after mulling over it a week i respond saying we meet for coffee. we do. he apologizes. says his disappearance had nothing to do with me. he wasnt over his break up and didnt know how to respond to his feelings and got paralyzed. he didnt have the balls to talk to me until he realized he didnt want to lose me so he tried to reach out. he said he cant take back what he did but he doesnt want to be that kind of man. he had and still has feelings for me and begs me to take him back.
i say i'll think about it and appreciate the apology. we part ways. fast forward to a couple of weeks back where he takes me out. buys dinner, holds my hand, tells me im beautiful, drives me home, doesnt initiate a kiss because he wants to "be a gentleman".
he then hosts a star wars party because he insists i must absolutely see the series. the party was on saturday evening. i arrive a little earlier than all our friends because of ride issues and he pours us some wine and we sit on the couch and talk. he takes my hands kisses them and tells me im beautiful and that he missed me. we kiss. our friends arrive and the movie continues. he asks if he can sit next to me on the couch and holds my hand and wraps his arm around me. we cuddle throughout the movie and kiss and he nuzzles my neck telling me how beautiful i am. the movie ends around 230 am. our friends go home. he insists he will drive me home but asks if i can give him 20 mins to get sober. (he drank a lot: two bottles of wine with another friend and a beerbottle) i wanted to kiss him some more anyway so i stay and we start making out for a while. he asks me to stay over. i say he'll have to convince me...in the middle of making out he crashes and falls asleep on me...soon he's out cold and snoring into my neck and im just curled up under him on the couch. i finally extricate myself from him and poke him awake to tell him he needs to sleep on the bed. he jerks awake and mumbles something about letting me have the bed. i say its okay. we kiss some more and then fall asleep.
in the morning i wake up early and wait for him to wake up. he sleepily holds my hand but is still fast asleep. i finally just get ready and then poke him awake saying i have to leave. he jumps out of bed and apologizes for crashing on me says he was drunk and is so so hungover. i quickly wear my coat and leave.
later that afternoon i send him a text thanking him hosting the wonderful evening. no response. monday and tuesday go by and still no response.weds midday i text him a joke about a mutual friend. he sends a short response.
im very hurt and disappointed. when he asked me to take him back he had said he didnt want to be the kind of guy he was in the summer and now he has reverted to his old ways and seems to be fading out again. did he lose interest? what shall i do? what...happened?
any input would be greatly appreciated!
He's emotionally unavailable. Shows all the typical signs. He'll compliment you in the beginning, hunt you down, shower you in attention, and then once he has you - it all goes to sh*t. There's a book my mom got when her & my dad divorced called Emotional Unavailability: Recognizing it and Avoiding its Trap. I read it also, it was very insightful. You should honestly read it, it's a wealth of great information.
He's emotionally unavailable. Shows all the typical signs. He'll compliment you in the beginning, hunt you down, shower you in attention, and then once he has you - it all goes to sh*t. There's a book my mom got when her & my dad divorced called Emotional Unavailability: Recognizing it and Avoiding its Trap. I read it also, it was very insightful. You should honestly read it, it's a wealth of great information.
erm but he was in a 4 year relationship before he met me with his college gf. granted his friends dont say it was a happy relationship and he almost cheated on her with me but still...isn't emotionally unavailable just another way of saying "he's just not that into you?" but if he's not that into me why go through the embarrassment of returning and begging me for forgiveness after he already had a clean break after initially disappearing? why spend the time and $$ wining and dining me? why throw the party?
it kind of doesnt make sense to me.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
updates! please help!
