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The bolded reminded me of 2 teenagers I saw a long time ago, who were making out in a packed bus I was in. They were in what I call the "young love" phase. They were making out with such wild abandon, ignoring the fact that the bus was packed. You could tell they'd never been heart broken before.
I saw something similar the other night while I was sitting in my car waiting to pick up a friend from work. A couple, probably late teens early twenties were frolicking in the parking lot, he was carrying her from the car etc. I was like wow, must be nice to have that life. I'd be lying if I didn't feel contemptuous of them, pathetic as that is to admit.
I guess the moral of the story is, life is not fair.
Very interesting, very timely thread (for me). Thanks for posting. Reps sent, and I'm reading responses.
I think that it can be undone, but probably more by fate, than by master plan. EG: When the stars align, and the right people meet AT THE RIGHT TIME, then it's possible. That's my opinion. (And I think timing is everything!)
Short response, I'm more in listen-mode tonight. (Rarity)
I saw something similar the other night while I was sitting in my car waiting to pick up a friend from work. A couple, probably late teens early twenties were frolicking in the parking lot, he was carrying her from the car etc. I was like wow, must be nice to have that life. I'd be lying if I didn't feel contemptuous of them, pathetic as that is to admit.
I guess the moral of the story is, life is not fair.
It is not pathetic.
I was "hating" on the teenagers myself. I was like "It is so unfair, why do they get to be this lucky" while in my life, I'd experienced heartbreak.
I think it is a natural emotion. Now I look back at that memory and I just smile.
Also after I had gotten to know her for a few months with some very encouraging progress, I also tried sending her one or 2 romantic song dedications that weren't too "over-the-top" or super-sugary. All of the above ultimately pushed her away though, in the end...to this day I can only speculate that in her case, the abuse she may have endured when she was younger caused her to not be able to trust guys with her heart, hence causing her heart to become hardened in that sense. So, no dice and it never turned into a relationship.
Dedicating a song to someone is cheesy, but I really don't see how that factors in to her pushing you away. It sounds like you were not compatible.
My view might be skewed because I'm a romantiphobe, but just because someone doesn't like romance doesn't mean they are "hardened."
Yup. Worked on un-hardening ( is that a word? lol) my sissy's heart for 3 years--that and suicide talks. (She's phenomenal but has been through a lot--She was raped). Phenomenal woman though, top of the line lawyer, beautiful heart, and physically she is absolutely gorgeous. It took me years to get her to see this and I am proud to say that after 3 years of her turning so many wonderful dates down, she is now in love to an equally attractive, kind, and successful person. They watch the sunset every Sunday from their "spot". Awwww. Love her! If she can do it anyone can. They just need genuine support, encouragement, and tough love --all at the right time
It is not pathetic.
I was "hating" on the teenagers myself. I was like "It is so unfair, why do they get to be this lucky" while in my life, I'd experienced heartbreak.
I think it is a natural emotion. Now I look back at that memory and I just smile.
No, its pretty pathetic. Here I am hating on them yet I'd trade spots with them in a second. I know they wouldn't want my life, thats for sure.
With age and experience (bad or good types) we all lose our innocence and naivete'.
But what it is replaced with can be so much better - WISDOM.
Don't mourn the loss of romantic dreams and fantasies my friend!
Embrace the opportunity to make wiser choices for yourself that can lead to more fulfilling relationships than those very young first time lovers are enjoying!
But there's a trick to being able to do this successfully....
ready...
YOU must not harden your heart.
YOU must not volunteer for perpetual Bitter Bus ridership
YOU must remember that every hardship that has come your way is an opportunity to grow, develop and deepen as a person.
The kind of person the right partner is just waiting for somewhere along your journey.
Even if that "partner" turns out to be just you
“Don’t let today’s disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow’s dreams.”
You must be the therapist that helped me do this about 20 years ago!
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