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I am naturally a person who likes knowing about other people,and thier situations in life. I find myself going to bars a lot by myself and I end up talking to lots of people all the time. I enjoy the conversations, but after years and years of being this way, I realize that nobody knows me or my situation/issues. I'm the type of guy that people naturally feel they can share things with as I absorb it, but they never ask too much about me. I feel alone and like nobody even cares sometimes. I give off a nice vibe and friendly vibe to people, but I hear their stories sometimes and wish they would listen to my advice, but as soon as I start speaking about my experiences to help them, they always cut me off because they assume my issues aren't as big. At that point I always say, "If they only knew, or spent time listening to the advice I was just about to tell them". I just think people do this because they are dealing with things and need to vent. Too bad that people like me can't vent though. People like me, naturally want to help other people, and lots of times people take advantage of that and we hardly ever get to vent or share our story. Anyone else feel this way?
There's validity to what you're saying, but would agree with others that a bar is not the place to go in an attempt to make connections. People talk to strangers b/c it's (generally a friendly place) and they're at least buzzing (so there's less inhibition awkwardness), but that'a about it.
I am naturally a person who likes knowing about other people,and thier situations in life. I find myself going to bars a lot by myself and I end up talking to lots of people all the time. I enjoy the conversations, but after years and years of being this way, I realize that nobody knows me or my situation/issues. I'm the type of guy that people naturally feel they can share things with as I absorb it, but they never ask too much about me. I feel alone and like nobody even cares sometimes. I give off a nice vibe and friendly vibe to people, but I hear their stories sometimes and wish they would listen to my advice, but as soon as I start speaking about my experiences to help them, they always cut me off because they assume my issues aren't as big. At that point I always say, "If they only knew, or spent time listening to the advice I was just about to tell them". I just think people do this because they are dealing with things and need to vent. Too bad that people like me can't vent though. People like me, naturally want to help other people, and lots of times people take advantage of that and we hardly ever get to vent or share our story. Anyone else feel this way?
Some people don't want to have an actual two way dialog. They just want to talk at people. I find this to be true a lot of the time. You can actually see them thinking of what they are gonna say next instead of listening.
My dad is the worst, he never pays attention to people when they talk.....
Some people don't want to have an actual two way dialog. They just want to talk at people. I find this to be true a lot of the time. You can actually see them thinking of what they are gonna say next instead of listening.
My dad is the worst, he never pays attention to people when they talk.....
I know a few people like this, of both genders, and they just talk over you ... and keep saying the same thing.
"Oh, but you HAVE TO come to our church, you'd hit it off with our pastor, and you'd like it." (6x ... at Starbucks ... from a coworker's wife).
I've been on long flights where you'll hear, and tell, most of the life story from, and to, the passenger next to you ... including some of the drama, but it's not a "poor me" session ... and the parties are sober.
Actually, if I had to pick between listening to someone's problems, and remained detached, OR being approached by a MLM person, I'd wear the shrink's hat ... for FREE.
OP, People go to bars for small talk, not talk therapy. They don't call it happy hour for nothing, i.e., stress relief by having a few and verbal farting to unload the crap you dealt with all day.
I am naturally a person who likes knowing about other people,and thier situations in life. I find myself going to bars a lot by myself and I end up talking to lots of people all the time. I enjoy the conversations, but after years and years of being this way, I realize that nobody knows me or my situation/issues. I'm the type of guy that people naturally feel they can share things with as I absorb it, but they never ask too much about me. I feel alone and like nobody even cares sometimes. I give off a nice vibe and friendly vibe to people, but I hear their stories sometimes and wish they would listen to my advice, but as soon as I start speaking about my experiences to help them, they always cut me off because they assume my issues aren't as big. At that point I always say, "If they only knew, or spent time listening to the advice I was just about to tell them". I just think people do this because they are dealing with things and need to vent. Too bad that people like me can't vent though. People like me, naturally want to help other people, and lots of times people take advantage of that and we hardly ever get to vent or share our story. Anyone else feel this way?
You're at a bar. People at bars typically have relationship problems because they are at the bar. Don't expect them to reciprocate or be sensitive to your issues. These are the wrong people to base your standards on.
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