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That doesn't strike me as a wise strategy. If good looks garner only superficial men, then intentionally harming one's appearance would attract more sincere men? If only gold-diggers glom onto wealth, then intentionally impoverishing oneself would fetch scrupulous and thrifty men?
As others have said, the purpose of weight-loss is improvement of one's health, confidence and well-being. It's exactly analogous to the reasons why men would consider lifting weights and building muscle. It won't necessarily attract more dates, and should not be regarded foremost as a scheme for improving one's dating-prospects.
Obviously obesity is not entirely the result of personal behavior. And I have seen examples of women who were formerly obese, who made tremendous efforts to lose weight and to improve their bodies, yet who despite the most steadfast effort can't shirk completely the ravages on their bodies of having been overweight. They still to some extent "look fat", and that, if you will, would filter out the superficial men. But these women deserve respect for their fortitude. That in turn will attract the better-quality men.
That doesn't strike me as a wise strategy. If good looks garner only superficial men, then intentionally harming one's appearance would attract more sincere men? If only gold-diggers glom onto wealth, then intentionally impoverishing oneself would fetch scrupulous and thrifty men?
As others have said, the purpose of weight-loss is improvement of one's health, confidence and well-being. It's exactly analogous to the reasons why men would consider lifting weights and building muscle. It won't necessarily attract more dates, and should not be regarded foremost as a scheme for improving one's dating-prospects.
Obviously obesity is not entirely the result of personal behavior. And I have seen examples of women who were formerly obese, who made tremendous efforts to lose weight and to improve their bodies, yet who despite the most steadfast effort can't shirk completely the ravages on their bodies of having been overweight. They still to some extent "look fat", and that, if you will, would filter out the superficial men. But these women deserve respect for their fortitude. That in turn will attract the better-quality men.
What is this talk about only superficial people being into good looks? Are you kidding me????
I'm sorry but I don't know a single good-looking guy that would want to date a fattie and I would call NONE of them shallow for it.
Some people actually look better fat... i just came across a lady who lost about 50 or so pounds but she looked older and her attitude was meaner. She was much nicer and happier and prettier when she was overweight.
To add to that.. I have an ex that use to talk to a girl who was thin and he thought was still thin from college but when she came to meet him she was much overweight. He slept with her then said he rejected her just wasnt attracted to fatties. So I didn't blame him for it he was still hot and had a great personality so i thought. He turned out to be a real jerk in the end though and it was because of his superficialities. Him not liking fatties was an indicator but he had many more superficialities about him.
Quote:
Originally Posted by capitol
A guy is not shallow for not wanting to date a fattie. Some people aren't attracted to a 300 lb person. Humans weren't built to be 300 lbs so why should he be attracted to that? To me someone who is huge signifies laziness in 99% of the cases and lack of respect for their body. How can you do that to your body when you only have 1 chance to live? If they are lazy with their body, what else are they lazy with?
Quote:
Originally Posted by ohio_peasant
That doesn't strike me as a wise strategy. If good looks garner only superficial men, then intentionally harming one's appearance would attract more sincere men? If only gold-diggers glom onto wealth, then intentionally impoverishing oneself would fetch scrupulous and thrifty men?
As others have said, the purpose of weight-loss is improvement of one's health, confidence and well-being. It's exactly analogous to the reasons why men would consider lifting weights and building muscle. It won't necessarily attract more dates, and should not be regarded foremost as a scheme for improving one's dating-prospects.
Obviously obesity is not entirely the result of personal behavior. And I have seen examples of women who were formerly obese, who made tremendous efforts to lose weight and to improve their bodies, yet who despite the most steadfast effort can't shirk completely the ravages on their bodies of having been overweight. They still to some extent "look fat", and that, if you will, would filter out the superficial men. But these women deserve respect for their fortitude. That in turn will attract the better-quality men.
That doesn't strike me as a wise strategy. If good looks garner only superficial men, then intentionally harming one's appearance would attract more sincere men?
The point is that being overweight doesn't mean death to one's social life. I've known overweight women who were very vivacious and attracted a lot of men. The unknown element here is that we don't know how overweight the OP is. It's all relative.
Funny thing, I'm in pretty good shape. I'd describe myself more "lean" than "muscular," I'm probably not going to win any power lifting competitions, but I am a pretty good runner. I'm in pretty solid shape all around. I work out on a daily basis. Still, if I were not married it wouldn't be too hard for an overweight woman whose personality complemented my own to snag me for the long haul. I share this because I think that it is perfectly normal for an overweight person to be attracted to and want to be with a more fit person, and that it is not outside the realm of possibility for them to find that person, either.
Yes, it is normal for an overweight person to be attracted to a fit person, but in the case of the dating profile I read, it literally read, "Yeah, I know I am a thick chick, but if you are a fat man I will not reply to you!" There is a difference between being attracted to a body type, and disqualifying everybody who doesn't fall into that body type when you yourself do not fit in.
And yes, I know that there are women who have made a tremendous effort to get in shape but, even with the weight loss, still exhibit some previous signs of their former selves. Again, as someone who is into fitness, that doesn't bother me at all. You don't have to be a fitness model or a bodybuilder for me to want to date you, but I would like somebody who takes care of their body.
I'm sorry but I don't know a single good-looking guy that would want to date a fattie and I would call NONE of them shallow for it.
Well, I know that you don't know me personally, and maybe I'm not "good looking" by your standards (though I've never had a problem attracting women) but I would offer myself as evidence refuting your statement. I've dated women of all body types and eventually grew to prefer the "fatties" as you call them.
"Yeah, I know I am a thick chick, but if you are a fat man I will not reply to you!"
Lol I've witnessed this before, but in real life. I've seen fat guys consistently reject fat girls...and I'm like seriously? Have you taken a look in the mirror?
Also, to give an example of someone who is, "technically," overweight, but would totally find myself dating if I could:
This is Sarah Robles. She is an olympic weightlifter who outweighs me by more than 100 lbs. But I would have no qualms about dating her because that is almost all muscle. She may be "overweight," but she lives a fit lifestyle.
Or at least getting dates? How is it that I see many overweight people getting dates or in relationships.I have been on a few dates in the past couple years but they don't lead to anything special. Would losing weight change that?
It would give you a better chance of finding love with a smaller pretty woman. But most woman don't care about weight if they are attracted to a guy's face
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