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If I don't understand the male psyche, then why am I so successful with men?
You mean it teaches men who are inclined to be douchebags that they will get better results. Your post carries the implication that "better results" and "winning" are quick sex and quantity of vagina over meaningful relationship with someone to love, who loves you. That's what being a douchebag is all about.
Most level-headed, mature men aren't douchebags, though, and they don't have to be taught anything because they can think for themselves and they take women as individuals. Thank goodness.
Wait, you wanted to tell him he isn't telling the truth? My observation and personal experience tells me otherwise. I'm just not interested in doing that, I can live perfectly well without involving into it and focus my life on useful things.
I don't even want to speak about anecdotal evidence, it's very rampant in today's world any any guy can look around themselves to see it for themselves. They don't need me to tell them that, you to deny it, or ascension2012 to teach them to be douchebags.
I think I've summed it up earlier - when you have people bashing you for "being insecure" and give you an unacceptable choice, the right answer is to bash them back by not caring and doing what you consider is right for your interests. This makes you a jerk in their eyes but shaming doesn't work because you find it as a "congratulations, sir, you wont the jerk award!" accomplishment. This is very common when you deal with such people in business as well.
For me, "winning" means being successful with other things, than seeking recognition in number of women I bang. I'm leaving that to chefs and waiters in the legal workforce and pimps and drug dealers among the outlaws.
And another thing. I mentioned the children scenario on purpose and you see, you immediately saw a "single mom" scenario and you keep on with the offensive.
Here's the scenario to think about and watch how it suddenly changes your context:
A guy is separated or divorced but has a child from another relationship. He says he's single and/or has no children. He's justifying it later on that he wasn't lying - he is single because there's nobody with him, he considers himself divorced (if he isn't divorced) or he considers that he never was divorced to begin with - to hide the fact that he might have a child that he doesn't want to visit: "You know, past should stay in the past... the fact that I didn't tell you about my child with Jane in my ex marriage shouldn't affect anything". Or the another one: "Yeah, I banged your friend but we weren't exclusive yet. I can tell you she isn't even close to your skills and it means nothing to me!"
Anyone who buys that stuff is an idiot because there's a disaster in the making. People do want to leave better impression on other folks, that's okay. But when they deliberately hide things which they already know are going to be elimination factor and when they try to keep them hidden? That's manipulation factor in my book, and many folks even do much worse things later on.
Up until Last Thursday, my relationship with my boyfriend ("john" has been excellent. We met over a year ago and things really clicked between us. The chemistry was great. I'm 28, he's 26. He's on the conservative side so when we got serious he wanted to have "the talk." I basicallt told him that I don't think the past is important and that we should focus on the present and our future together. I think he grudgingly accepted that.
Thins in the bedroom are pretty good. I made him wait a while (about four months) before we got intimate because that's how you get a guy into a serios relationship. He wasn't happy, but said he'd respect my wishes. Anyway, I concluded that he was the man for me.
This past Wednesday when he came over he had a funny look on his face. He said he wanted to discuss something. Basically, he found out That I had "dated" a guy he knows tangentially. He also said that he was told that I had sex with that guy on our first date. He asked me if that was true? I wasn't ready for that shock and didn't answer. I think he took that as a yes.
He quietly then said something like "so you made me wait for months but you put out to dirtbag "Sal" first night out?" I didn't know what to say. John then left. I've called him many times and it was only today that he finally picked up. He's agreed to meet up for a coffee later on tonight.
The story about "Sal" is true but I haven't admitted it. How do I handle this?! John is a really good man and I don't want him to leave me. How should I approach our coffee tonight and what can I say to get things back to the way they were?
Things are NEVER going to be "the way they were"..........walk away and be grateful you dodged this immature, insecure bullet now and not after you got married or pregnant or both.
PS ~~ You OWE NOTHING to your current alleged boyfriend, it really is NONE OF HIS BUSINESS what is in the past unless of course you have HIV or some other disease.
The bottom line is Sal is out of the picture and John is in the picture. How long she did/didn't wait for each one shouldn't be relevant: if Sal was that great, John would not be in the picture at all.
Sal shouldn't matter at all at this point. It's not as if the OP has shown any interest in reconciling or was comparing the two guys: Sal was forgotten until John brought him up.
If John isn't insecure, immature, etc. whatever one wishes to call him, he should eventually realize these points.
26 is very young for a guy, if you take todays dating world into consideration. Most people in their twenties are too busy having fun or furthering their careers, to settle down at that age, so comparing it to ancient times doesnt do us any good. Dont worry about taking personal jabs at me, it sort of lets me know that you are running out of arguments and honestly I couldnt care less. Haha
Not for a mature guy who knows what he wants in life, and is with the right person.
And what she wanted was a serious relationship with someone she liked and did what she thought she had to in order to make a favorable impression on someone who she says has a "conservative" way of looking at things.
Not sure how this is much different than a man not rushing or pressuring a woman with a conservative way of looking at things.
Of course, as someone else pointed out, how "conservative" can he be if she had to "make him wait." Sounds like he wanted to have sex much sooner than that. Maybe her big mistake here is that she didn't just go for it sooner. Then he'd have nothing to beyotch about. Then again, if she did have sex with him sooner, maybe he wouldn't have taken her seriously. As Nila pointed out, who is manipuating whom?
That is something we'll never know. I don't see where he did anything to purposely mislead her.
Not for a mature guy who knows what he wants in life, and is with the right person.
Yep, because plenty of 22 year old girls want just that. LMAO.. He may start looking into 35 year olds to find someone compatible. Of course there are exceptions, but those only support the rule.
Up until Last Thursday, my relationship with my boyfriend ("john" has been excellent. We met over a year ago and things really clicked between us. The chemistry was great. I'm 28, he's 26. He's on the conservative side so when we got serious he wanted to have "the talk." I basicallt told him that I don't think the past is important and that we should focus on the present and our future together. I think he grudgingly accepted that.
Thins in the bedroom are pretty good. I made him wait a while (about four months) before we got intimate because that's how you get a guy into a serios relationship. He wasn't happy, but said he'd respect my wishes. Anyway, I concluded that he was the man for me.
This past Wednesday when he came over he had a funny look on his face. He said he wanted to discuss something. Basically, he found out That I had "dated" a guy he knows tangentially. He also said that he was told that I had sex with that guy on our first date. He asked me if that was true? I wasn't ready for that shock and didn't answer. I think he took that as a yes.
He quietly then said something like "so you made me wait for months but you put out to dirtbag "Sal" first night out?" I didn't know what to say. John then left. I've called him many times and it was only today that he finally picked up. He's agreed to meet up for a coffee later on tonight.
The story about "Sal" is true but I haven't admitted it. How do I handle this?! John is a really good man and I don't want him to leave me. How should I approach our coffee tonight and what can I say to get things back to the way they were?
Nothing more annoying than a girl who tries to manipulate a guy with sex
On one night stands. The guy is a dirtbag,so that makes the girl what, an angel. It take TWO for a one night stand. Each one has nothing to brag about to their priest.
Yep, because plenty of 22 year old girls want just that. LMAO.. He may start looking into 35 year olds to find someone compatible. Of course there are exceptions, but those only support the rule.
Who said anything about a 22 year old?
I see a lot of bitter people here who think because they haven't made a relationship work, something is wrong with everyone else. There are a lot of happy couples who married in their mid-20's. There is nothing inherently wrong with it or with them.
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Who said anything about a 22 year old?