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My mother changed everything in her life when she got divorced so it only made sense to change to her maiden name as well. She moved to another house in another city, changed her phone number, her email, her car and got rid of the bastard's last name.
i had a co worker who had this beautiful intricately detailed pendant on her necklace. it was of a rat.
one day after class i asked her about it and she told me that she had all the jewelry that her ex husband had gotten her and she had a jeweler melt it down and made into the pendant that it was. why rat? i asked, and she saiid her husband was a two timing rat ba$ terd and she wanted something beautiful to memorialize her failed marriage.
the meaning behind the necklace was epic. it made the necklace that was already pretty much more so.
i had a co worker who had this beautiful intricately detailed pendant on her necklace. it was of a rat.
one day after class i asked her about it and she told me that she had all the jewelry that her ex husband had gotten her and she had a jeweler melt it down and made into the pendant that it was. why rat? i asked, and she saiid her husband was a two timing rat ba$ terd and she wanted something beautiful to memorialize her failed marriage.
the meaning behind the necklace was epic. it made the necklace that was already pretty much more so.
My mother only kept the jewellery her mother-in-law had given her. My grandmother only had sons so she gave plenty of pieces to my mother.
The few things my sperm donor gave to her, she sold them and gave the money to my brother and I.
I changed my maiden name to my first husband's name because we had children and playing happy families with the same name was important to me when I was young.
My second marriage however I have kept my maiden name and in all my correspondence I am referred to as Ms.
Changing your name to take your husband's surname is outdated and patriarchal in my opinion.
I changed my maiden name to my first husband's name because we had children and playing happy families with the same name was important to me when I was young.
My second marriage however I have kept my maiden name and in all my correspondence I am referred to as Ms.
Changing your name to take your husband's surname is outdated and patriarchal in my opinion.
im also starting to think this. my husband is a real caveman. hes the type that believe women are a lesser species. he always uses the term "real men this and real men that" women to him are dispensable- including me. i served him with divorce papers and he wont sign them. he always needs to have the upperhand. he so negative and just awful.
We have twin girls and its a good thing i dont have any boys with him. he has said that boys shouldnt listen to their mother because they grow up thinking its ok to take orders from a woman.
oh and alot of women name their first born/or son after the husband. what happens if the marriage sours? then your child shares the name as him. thats not really terrible because a name doesnt complete someone but it might be a constant reminder of the ex to some people.
there are men who take the wifes name although its rare, but they do.
a famous person who did this is Jack White from the band The White Stripes. he started that band with his wife, whos name is Meg White. he remarried and had children and he kept his wifes name. now his new wife is also last named White and so are his children.
i dont think i can be with a man or actually take his last name if it was his ex wifes. unless his original last name is horrible and the wifes name is really, REALLY nice. but stilll...
I went back to my maiden name, even thought it would be different than my childrens. I would be divorced from my ex, and I no longer wanted his name.
There was no more hassle, or not much, anyway. I just had to do a name change request sheet in the divorce paper work.
He signed off on it, and it went through without a hitch.
For some reason, it had to be ok'd by him, which I do not understand.
I wonder about that too. It was written in my divorce decree. I guess he could have objected if he had wanted to be a bigger arse. I had always assumed you could just go back to you maiden name without permission.
Because it's a pain to change it back and because once everyone at work knows you by a certain name, it becomes even more complicated. I'll likely change it back eventually, but it's not a huge deal. It's just a name.
I wonder about that too. It was written in my divorce decree. I guess he could have objected if he had wanted to be a bigger arse. I had always assumed you could just go back to you maiden name without permission.
For what it's worth, I needed permission too if I went though with it.
Seems weird to me though (aside from needing someone else's permission to change your own name). I mean what's the point of the permission? Even if the man said "no." Once the divorce is over, you can just file for a name change anyway... just like anyone else who does a name change.
Because it's a pain to change it back and because once everyone at work knows you by a certain name, it becomes even more complicated. I'll likely change it back eventually, but it's not a huge deal. It's just a name.
Does this depend a lot on how the marriage ended? In my sister's case, there was some physical abuse involved during the marriage and lack of child support after the divorce. I think that these things made her want to drop the bastard's last name even though it's her son's surname also.
I think the idea of taking someone else's name is silly to begin with. And it's especially ridiculous for women to take the man's last name - if you're going to take someone's name at all - because it seems largely to have to do with the "claiming" of children. A woman knows who her children are, but a man (until recently) could never be certain. So the children should carry her name by default, IMO.
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