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I don't regard my height as a problem--perhaps I'm stupid and it is a bigger problem to more women than I'm aware of.
However, I'm not as short as 5'5" but even I recognize very few men (grown adult men no longer physically growing in height) standing under 5'5" can be successful with women, can be womanizers or "players."
Not that it's impossible but very unlikely.
But before feminism its was never impossible for a woman to have monetary, political, or professional power given there were say... Queens and female plantation owners.
It's also not impossible--in theory--as the Republicans say... for a person to come to the United States with only a couple quarters in their pocket, and with no need of labor unions, feminists, or Democrats work their way into being worth many millions of dollars.
Democrats, liberals, and feminist refuse to use statistical outliers as representative of what most or all can achieve unless a) its a male unsuccessful in attracting female mates or b) it helps their ideology and goals.
Let us apply the female outlier of the woman that can beat up 50% of grown men on earth. Should not we lift our noses at female victims of domestic violence dating or married to men, after all, there exists a few women that could actually beat than man up and beat up half the men on earth? If she is getting beat up we can blame her for failing to learn how to fight, for having great character flaws.
But that would be as ridiculous as to point at lottery winners, or successful casino gamblers, or men standing under 5'5" that are extremely successful with women.
Eh, like I said, I may not agree with the whole 'short guys are inherently unattractive' because I know A LOT of short men who do perfectly fine with dating. One of the biggest crushes I ever had was on my 5'4 friend and he wouldn't give me the time of day because he had a ton of women after him. Do shorter men have more difficult? Probably. Who am I to say? I'm a ridiculously tall woman so MOST people are short to me.
I just get sick of every single thread on here turning into a 'short men have it soooo bad' thread.
Now hear me out. Men(not all)think they are better looking than what they really are. This is why they date up. Women on the other hand tend to think they are not all that. That's why some settle. Do you agree?
Nope. It's a huge generalization. I've met a lot of women who demand greek adonises yet look like they could stand to take a walk around a block once in a while. My point is delusional knows no one gender so I wish people would stop thinking that it does.
As far as looks go, I've personally seen guys that most would see as average or above average get with below average women.
Before I get flamed, Yes I know attraction extends far beyond looks but looks and how men and women look are what the OP is asking so I'll stick to topic.
Nope. It's a huge generalization. I've met a lot of women who demand greek adonises yet look like they could stand to take a walk around a block once in a while. My point is delusional knows no one gender so I wish people would stop thinking that it does.
As far as looks go, I've personally seen guys that most would see as average or above average get with below average women.
Before I get flamed, Yes I know attraction extends far beyond looks but looks and how men and women look are what the OP is asking so I'll stick to topic.
But it's not so much what people expect on the dating market than how they feel about themselves. It is a generalization, but I know a lot more guys who look at themselves in the mirror and think, "Looking good!" and a lot more women who think, "Eh, good enough. If only I were taller/shorter, thicker/thinner, etc."
But it's not so much what people expect on the dating market than how they feel about themselves. It is a generalization, but I know a lot more guys who look at themselves in the mirror and think, "Looking good!" and a lot more women who think, "Eh, good enough. If only I were taller/shorter, thicker/thinner, etc."
Maybe it's not so much that men don't have body image issues, maybe it's a matter of men are not allowed to have body image issues because it outwardly screams insecurity which is a quick way for a man to be not only a dating pariah but a social pariah.
As Brad said earlier,
Quote:
Originally Posted by BradPiff
As for guys and this has always been a theory of mine. I feel the reason We think men think more highly of themselevs is because its not really socially acceptable for men to be insecure in public(or in general). So guys either hold it in or act arrogant in public while deep down feeling insecure.
No one wants to hear a man **** moan about how much he hates his body so he keeps it to himself. But it doesn't mean that he doesn't have body issues.
Interesting thread. I don't think men really think they are that great looking, they tend not to focus on looks as much. They also correctly have figured out that for women, men's physical attractiveness is just one part of what might make them attractive to women. Plus the whole mentality of women and men is different. Men know they have to do most of the pursuing. Women put lots of effort into looking good to attract the more desirable men.
Good posting. Most unattractive guys would never agree with this though lol
That was a good post by orangeapple and I would agree with it. That does not negate the role of looks--for either males or females. A woman that is not particularly blessed in good looks can have an attitude and way about herself that draws oneor more handsome successful men to her.
The wife of Will Smith would be one example. In Black-America she does not have the more curvy, larger butt, body type that would attract a lot of men to her. She would not even be rated as "average." She would fall in the "below average" looks for a black woman for most black males.
How do you explain she is romantically successful but there are a lot of women (on this site too) that have complained about being unsuccessful with men, or that many men pass up the "normal" looking girl in the corner with a great personality? I always find it interesting how women unsuccessful attracting males have "great personalities" but male unsuccessful attracting female mates automatically have personalities that suck nd are just no good as human beings period.
Also, how would you explain a white woman in college, that clearly had alpha female characteristic to her personality, aggressively making advances on me that looked similar to this actress Ann Hathaway?
Was it my winning personality?
Or what about the mulatta that asked form my phone number. She looked on par with someone in this rating of looks. Must be because I'm just an awesome person.
Eh, like I said, I may not agree with the whole 'short guys are inherently unattractive' because I know A LOT of short men who do perfectly fine with dating. One of the biggest crushes I ever had was on my 5'4 friend and he wouldn't give me the time of day because he had a ton of women after him. Do shorter men have more difficult? Probably. Who am I to say? I'm a ridiculously tall woman so MOST people are short to me.
I just get sick of every single thread on here turning into a 'short men have it soooo bad' thread.
I'm either 5'6" or 5'7" depending on whether or not the nurse accurately measured me. If she did then I'm 5'7".
My height seems to be of little to no obstacle for with respects to attracting women. Again, American women and not more typically shorter women in developing nations.
But I'm sure if I were much taller I'd attract a lot more women. I'd like to be taller. I'd probably be dunking in basketball. Have a longer reach for boxing. And less men would see me as potential prey.
But I'm comfortable in my height. But like I said... it does not seem to be a great obstacle for me.
Possibly, that might be due to other things females find visually attractive about me. I don't know.
I also don't want to give the impression women are falling out the trees to be with me. They're not. Most don't pay any special attention to me. Which is fine. Occasionally or two do.
Whereas in the past in my fugly looking days I could have approached 300 women in a month and reasonable comeback with 0 to 1 phone numbers. More typically 0 but I were lucky on an occasion then I might get 1 number out 6 months or a year. But today I could probably approach 300 women in a month and get 150 or 200 numbers maybe? I think so. And just within that month. A years worth trying would multiply that by 12.
Now hear me out. Men(not all)think they are better looking than what they really are. This is why they date up. Women on the other hand tend to think they are not all that. That's why some settle. Do you agree?
Lol sorry but I have met PLENTY of women who think they are gods gift to the world. There are men like that too.
"A man will marry the best looking woman he can afford."
There's a whole swath of people who don't take looks into account much at all, but rather, are instantly attracted to someone who shares their unusual interests or hobbies, and then attraction to the rest of the package grows from there. For some people, it's more like what "somebodynew" said:
somebodynew
No. Dating has next to nothing to do with looks. The fact that so many people think it does is why there are so many disgruntled posters on here. That and this obsession with categorizing the genders in useless ways and assuming that the individuals that they are interacting with adhere to those categorizations.
Back to the OK-Cupid blog linked above (repeated here: Your Looks and Your Inbox « OkTrends ). I'm quite dismayed by the graph of "message success by attractiveness", for men. It shows, among other things, that even for the least attractive men, some 13% of messages sent to the most attractive women, will be answered. For a moderately unattractive man writing to a medium female, the percentage of replies rises to around 30%-40%.
My response rate hovers around 10%. That is to say, if I send 100 messages, perhaps 10 will be answered; and most of the answers are terse "I like your message but we don't have much in common; please have a nice day!".
Thoughts?
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