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I have been dating this guy for almost a year now. He's 22 and I'm 26. We are both head over heels in love with one another, but he's adamant about not wanting to get married until he is 28, 29 years old. I don't know if I can wait that long until he decides to pop the question. I feel torn because I don't want to wait until I'm nearly in my mid - 30s to get married. When will I have kids? I don't want to take the risk of having kids in my late 30s to early 40s. I just don't know what to do.
If you all have been together 1 yr now and you guys compromise on marriage by targeting for when you're around 30-ish, you can have kids early 30's if it is on BOTH of your agendas.
Where are you two in your work life or education? Is he finished with college, or will he go to grad school? Are you in a career, or more of a to-pay-the-bills job? Have you two talked about your goals for the future, both as individuals and as a couple? This may be a different-life-stages case, not sure without more info.
If you all have been together 1 yr now and you guys compromise on marriage by targeting for when you're around 30-ish, you can have kids early 30's if it is on BOTH of your agendas.
She may be worried that when 28 comes around for him, that the relationship might be on shaky ground, or something, and she will have waited all those years for nothing. Maybe her real question is more along the lines of: "should I bail now and look for someone who's closer to being ready for marriage, or should I risk giving up 6 years of prime youth for a guy who may not deliver".
I have been dating this guy for almost a year now. He's 22 and I'm 26. We are both head over heels in love with one another, but he's adamant about not wanting to get married until he is 28, 29 years old. I don't know if I can wait that long until he decides to pop the question. I feel torn because I don't want to wait until I'm nearly in my mid - 30s to get married. When will I have kids? I don't want to take the risk of having kids in my late 30s to early 40s. I just don't know what to do.
I understand your point. I wouldn't want to wait 6-7 more years either. But he is very young. I think he should know by 25 whether he wants to marry you.
What on earth are you doing dating a baby? 22 is still wet behind the ears these days.
You can do the cougar thing later once you've had your kids. In your 20s its best if you date someone who is ready for babies, in men that's usually late 20s to early 30s at least.
Yes I know you're going to say "but I love him" ...it's a choice. Him or babies. At least for now.
What's all the rush anyway? You can have a baby right up to your 40s now.
I think it's way too soon to be freaking out about this. You've only been dating a year and your are in your 20's. Take the pressure off and see where things go.
Ruth4Truth, that is exactly what I am thinking. What if four years from now it just doesn't work out. I would have wasted so much time and it'll take me time to move and find someone else. When you're 22, time is such a luxury, but that's not quite the case when you're 26 pushing 27.
Ruth4Truth, that is exactly what I am thinking. What if four years from now it just doesn't work out. I would have wasted so much time and it'll take me time to move and find someone else. When you're 22, time is such a luxury, but that's not quite the case when you're 26 pushing 27.
True, but I would be very hesitant to end a relationship with someone who I was "head over heels" in love with. There's no guarantee you'll ever find that again. I wouldn't want to marry and have kids with someone who I didn't love as much.
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