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There sure are some depressing threads and posts today. Maybe it's time for me to take another break from CDR.
if I, or anyone else in the world were to ever say that it would either be the result or the cause of crippling deppression, ergo suicide probably wouldn't be far off
I feel like after my last relationship of 2 years ended, I can't do it again. I'm in my late 20s and am feeling like "screw it".... too much time and energy to keep trying to "find the one" or whatever. . .
I'm basically giving up on dating and will live my life with just me, myself, and I. And be completely fine with it.
No. I doubt most people do - and if they do say or write this, it's almost certainly a temporary feeling. Your biological firmware eventually wins out of temporary frustration.
Meh. If I never have another boyfriend again (I'm 37), I don't think I'll be particularly upset. I like myself. I have a full life, and I've been in love and had it returned. I've got way more good in my life than probably the vast majority of the rest of the world, so I'm going to count myself ahead, even if that "good" doesn't include a partner.
Honestly, when I'm really down -whether it's over being single or my professional life or my financial situation or whatever, I just think "At least I'm not in Somalia." I call it the Somalia Mantra - it works like a charm.
I signed up for all these dating sites, etc and have received tons and tons of msgs and have just been ugh! about all of them.
Perhaps I should just take myself out of the dating game altogether and take up a hobby like white water rafting or knitting or something.
You should be doing that anyway. Why would it be an either-or proposition? That's how you meet women--by being active. There are lots of women doing white-water rafting, rock climbing, sailing, kayaking, trekking through Mongolia, etc.
Why are you "ugh" about all the women who have sent you messages, btw?
Yup. Feel that way every day. Every single person I like does not feel the same about me. And it's so unbearable when it's someone you really really want and you have everything in common and get a long great, yet there is still something missing that makes them not want you more than a friend.
I honestly feel like there is no one out there for me.
I suspect that I'm old enough to be most of the people posting here's mother - or at the very least, older sister. *lol*
I just wanted to say there are worse things than being alone.
As someone who has been married (and divorced) twice, and who has spent the last eighteen years as a single parent (since my baby was four months old), I am looking forward to the day when I am truly "alone" and my last child is out on his own (he just turned eighteen; my oldest will be 38 in September).
Over all these years, I have seen many, many friends and acquaintances "settle." Settle for somebody - anybody - just because they didn't want to be alone.
I am at a point in my life where I cherish my time alone. I love my kids, and I'm sure I'll suffer somewhat when my last one flies the coop, but I've been taking care of people (husbands and kids) for well over half of my lifetime, and I look forward to not having that responsibility anymore (at least on a daily basis - I still wouldn't hesitate to do my kids' laundry if they ever needed me to - not that I've ever been asked - but I'm still a "mom," after all).
Anyway, I just wanted to suggest that you can still have a full and satisfying life without that "albatross" of an unfulfilled relationship around your neck - just because you think being with someone is better than being alone.
Love and commitment and mutual respect are great - if you can find it. But, if it doesn't happen, please learn to enjoy your own company - find activities and interests and hobbies that YOU like and that YOU want to do, instead of centering your life around someone who doesn't respect you or who treats you like crap.
There are worse things - way worse - than being alone.
I've felt this way ever since the only LTR I've ever had ended with me being widowed at the age of 34.
If I'm blessed with a second chance, great. If not, at least I'm one of the lucky ones who did find love in their life at least once.
Sorry for your loss and yes, you are lucky to have been in a relationship where love was both ways.
I was in a relationship where love was only one way and it wasn't coming in my direction. And that is the only relationship I've been in since I divorced 10 years ago. I haven't dated nor been in another relationship since. So, I've never known what it was like to be loved. I have also accepted that I will never find anyone and just move on.
Although, some days, the loneliness, seems a fate worse than death.
I feel like after my last relationship of 2 years ended, I can't do it again. I'm in my late 20s and am feeling like "screw it".... too much time and energy to keep trying to "find the one" or whatever. . .
I'm basically giving up on dating and will live my life with just me, myself, and I. And be completely fine with it.
I have a similar but slightly different issue. A five year relationship that I was in came to an ugly and abrupt end due to her new hobby of drugs and other outside factors (I could write a whole book on this event). When that happened, I had instantly lost the will to connect with women on deeper level. I'm happy just being around them, engaging in activities, boning them and such, but my mind rejects getting too close. It puts me in a situation because I have a type of care free personality, and I engage in activities that put me in contact with lots of women so naturally, you know.. you meet people. But when I spend too much time with a woman, she tends to want to take it further, and though I might like her, I just don't "feel" the same way. This is when I tend to create distance between us. This has happened at least 8 times over. And it doesn't help that I have a non stop sex drive.
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