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Guys who do well with women tend to be confident, but that doesn't mean it's because of their confidence. In my opinion, it's because confident guys tend to be good looking. The reason they developed their immense confidence with women is because they know women are sexually attracted to them.
But, let's say it's true that confidence in and of itself is an attractive feature. Then good looking guys automatically have a big advantage because they are perceived as confident, especially if they're tall. This makes for cyclic increase of confidence and success with women.
Be good looking ---> get validation from women ---> develop confidence as a result ---> be even more attractive because you're confident ---> get even more validation from women ----> etc.
The opposite is
Be bad looking ---> get no validation from women ---> develop low self-esteem ---> be unattractive in part because of your low self-esteem ---> get even less validation ---> etc.
Guys who do well with women tend to be confident, but that doesn't mean it's because of their confidence. In my opinion, it's because confident guys tend to be good looking. The reason they developed their immense confidence with women is because they know women are sexually attracted to them.
But, let's say it's true that confidence in and of itself is an attractive feature. Then good looking guys automatically have a big advantage because they are perceived as confident, especially if they're tall. This makes for cyclic increase of confidence and success with women.
Be good looking ---> get validation from women ---> develop confidence as a result ---> be even more attractive because you're confident ---> get even more validation from women ----> etc.
The opposite is
Be bad looking ---> get no validation from women ---> develop low self-esteem ---> be unattractive in part because of your low self-esteem ---> get even less validation ---> etc.
But there's also a positive feedback loop.
Be average/plain looking. Develop confidence/charisma---->get validation from women---->self-esteem grows, resulting in---->genuine confidence----->more validation from women----->the sky's the limit!
This is what I believe. Be good looking, be attractive and dont be unattractive. Don't you think plain Janes, fat women or ugly women want something similar by their sides on the street yet together in bed at night. To some extent no.
True confidence comes from developing yourself and a well rounded life and lifestyle outside of any relationship. True confidence is gained by accomplishments not if a woman looks at you. True confidence is also what I call "quiet confidence" as a person does not have to even list off all that they can do for others to know their confidence. Many people have what I call "Loud confidence" which is false confidence. My dad was one of them, my brother's and I used to joke the louder he talked the less they know.
I've read several of your threads and posts and it's time to stop blaming other people, situations, your height and women for all your problems. In other words, if you want confidence - get a life.
I know quite a few 'ugly' guys who are comfortable with themselves and therefore confident in their abilities. They have zero issues with women and usually have a few vying for their attention. I've mentioned before that one of the biggest players I know is a 5'4 110 lb guy who definitely isn't attractive by any stretch of the mind..but he's hilarious and an absolute blast to be around. Another is a 300+lb ginger guy I know, he is NEVER wanting for female attention.
I just wish confidence worked that way with women.
A man can be genuinely good-looking, and *still* potentially be treated harshly or cruelly by many women though, leading to the same cycle of low self-esteem that you had referenced below...
Quote:
Originally Posted by AStalkingButler
Guys who do well with women tend to be confident, but that doesn't mean it's because of their confidence. In my opinion, it's because confident guys tend to be good looking. The reason they developed their immense confidence with women is because they know women are sexually attracted to them.
But, let's say it's true that confidence in and of itself is an attractive feature. Then good looking guys automatically have a big advantage because they are perceived as confident, especially if they're tall. This makes for cyclic increase of confidence and success with women.
Be good looking ---> get validation from women ---> develop confidence as a result ---> be even more attractive because you're confident ---> get even more validation from women ----> etc.
The opposite is
Be bad looking ---> get no validation from women ---> develop low self-esteem ---> be unattractive in part because of your low self-esteem ---> get even less validation ---> etc.
Guys who do well with women tend to be confident, but that doesn't mean it's because of their confidence. In my opinion, it's because confident guys tend to be good looking. The reason they developed their immense confidence with women is because they know women are sexually attracted to them.
But, let's say it's true that confidence in and of itself is an attractive feature. Then good looking guys automatically have a big advantage because they are perceived as confident, especially if they're tall. This makes for cyclic increase of confidence and success with women.
Be good looking ---> get validation from women ---> develop confidence as a result ---> be even more attractive because you're confident ---> get even more validation from women ----> etc.
The opposite is
Be bad looking ---> get no validation from women ---> develop low self-esteem ---> be unattractive in part because of your low self-esteem ---> get even less validation ---> etc.
I agree. Men have been way oversold on the whole "be confident" thing.
Confidence is a great thing to have, but will only make you attractive if you have a lot of other things already working in your favor.
I agree. Men have been way oversold on the whole "be confident" thing.
Confidence is a great thing to have, but will only make you attractive if you have a lot of other things already working in your favor.
False confidence just makes you look like a fool.
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