what to do when your date is fatter/uglier/older than expected? (unattractive, respect)
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This mostly applies to online dating though it can apply to blind dates. What do you do when your online date is much fatter or uglier than their picture? I had a situation like this recently. Went to a bar and couldn't find my date. I called her and she told me was at the bar. I finally make out which girl is her. Problem is that she was fatter than her pic. Like 20-30 lbs heavier. She didn't really look like her pic anymore. Clearly taken like 2 years ago. I gave her one glance up and down and told her this won't work out, then left the bar. She did text me later, but I was done with her. Whats the protocol in these situations.
The protocol? How about not to treat people like ****? You probably made her feel like crap. If she already had self-esteem issues, you made them worse. Since she made an effort to meet you in person (which isn't easy for any female due to the number of weirdos out there) the least you could have done is give her some of your time.
Somebody posting a flattering picture = treating you like garbage? Wow.
lololol at flattering picture
it's obvious when someone is posting a pic of someone that is no longer them so yes wasting someone's time by deceiving them into meeting you is treating them like garbage.
And furthermore, most people (and definitely most guys), wouldn't know a twenty pound difference to look at it, anyway. I've never even known a guy to be able to estimate others' weight with anything resembling accuracy, unless they were medical professionals or trainers.
estimating an exact weight is difficult, but that's not what the op was doing here.he was estimating how much more she weighed than in her pic which is a much different thing.you can have 2 people of the same height and weight where one looks fat and one doesn't. however noticing someone is a lot heavier than their pics is a lot different than guessing someones exact weight.a woman of normal height who weighs about 20 pounds more than her pics is going to look a lot different unless in her pics she was already really fat to begin with.
The protocol? How about not to treat people like ****? You probably made her feel like crap. If she already had self-esteem issues, you made them worse. Since she made an effort to meet you in person (which isn't easy for any female due to the number of weirdos out there) the least you could have done is give her some of your time.
Well done.
yea let's give her a trophy for making an effort for meeting him in person
Since she made an effort to meet you in person (which isn't easy for any female due to the number of weirdos out there) the least you could have done is give her some of your time.
I'm glad you brought this up. Us guys lose sight of just how hesitant most women are to meet someone in person. When I agree to meet someone, I'm not worried about my personal safety. My biggest fear is that person won't live up to my expectations or just won't show up. That's pretty minor compared to what women worry about when they agree to meet. I doubt the OP even thought about that. All he was concerned with was that he had been wronged. Let's assume this woman knew she was being dishonest. How does she know he won't react angrily and make a scene? How does she know he won't follow her afterwards to get revenge for being lied to? She took a big chance, but the OP didn't seem to care.
lololol at flattering picture
it's obvious when someone is posting a pic of someone that is no longer them so yes wasting someone's time by deceiving them into meeting you is treating them like garbage.
LOL, man, if you ever REALLY get treated like garbage, it's gonna be a rude awakening!
Why should the op give half a crap about the fact women have more to worry about than men when they meet someone off the internet after the pulls the old bait and switch. She took a big chance hoping he would fall for her deceit and trickery and it didn't work out for her.
LOL, man, if you ever REALLY get treated like garbage, it's gonna be a rude awakening!
well obviously there are things way worse in the world than what this woman did. in the grand scheme of things it's not the end of the world, but at the moment i'd be pretty pissed too.
yea let's give her a trophy for making an effort for meeting him in person
No one is saying she deserves a trophy. But given the risk she took in even agreeing to meet, she deserves better treatment than she got from him. There's a reason women prefer to meet in public places. It's so that if the man turns out to be mentally disturbed, there'll be others there to help. When's the last time you had to worry that the woman you were going to meet might turn out to be dangerous?
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