Wife or Girlfriend Objects to Porn (guy, loving, jealous, mature)
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On the one hand, it's not any of their business, and if it truly isn't affecting the relationship, then porn shouldn't be a problem. On the other hand, I think a woman does have the right to be concerned if she finds that her SO is watching a lot of "barely legal" or violent or extreme stuff. If a woman doesn't like porn, it doesn't necessarily mean that she's insecure or a prude. There's a lot about porn that's problematic, and shaming her for her concerns and telling her to suck it up and deal with it isn't the hallmark of a respectful relationship..
I agree if his viewing habits do not affect the relationship then no problem. However, once there is an objection the man should address it sooner rather than later. If his viewing habits lean toward the sicker stuff of course there is reason for concern, but to just govern the behavior as a means of control is unfair. It's this argument that goes unheard the most because one can (and usually does) claim the reason has more to do with "feelings" of inferiority or inadequacy instead of control over another person.
I agree that shaming a woman for her concerns is a bad idea, but the same should apply to women who try to shame men which is the case most of the time.
I'm just curious to hear others opinion on this as well since it's been brought up several times in this thread already. What legal porn is problematic? I think that most men know that the scenes in porn are role play, and just because they watch it, doesn't mean they want to beat up and rape women or molest a child.
Why isn't this same logic applied to men who watch a lot of violent action movies? Would you be concerned about them wanting to become a hitman who'll "whack" dozens of people just because they like watching actors do it on TV?
For me, I dislike women's being likened to animals or degraded--watch this nasty ***** get what she deserves, that kind of thing. Spit on, choked, take it you ugly ****, etc.
Unlike actors in a movie who aren't actually being shot, the woman in those scenarios is enduring those things. Many are obviously exploitative, either someone who needs the money or who has mental issues. As another woman, I empathize with her.
For me, I dislike women's being likened to animals or degraded--watch this nasty ***** get what she deserves, that kind of thing. Spit on, choked, take it you ugly ****, etc.
Unlike actors in a movie who aren't actually being shot, the woman in those scenarios is enduring those things. Many are obviously exploitative, either someone who needs the money or who has mental issues. As another woman, I empathize with her.
How do you know that some women do not enjoy it just like there are some men out there who enjoy having a woman dominate them? Why is it that women who enjoy rough sex are seen to as victims, but men who do dominatrix porn are not? There are women out there who like having their hair pulled, being slightly choked, being spanked, being dominated, etc... Why are sexualy open women always seen as being a victim in one way or another? Why do we as a society put grown women in the same category as we do children when it comes to the act of consenting to sexual acts? For example, if a 15 year old wants to have date with a 21 year old, we'd it as the 21 year old is trying to take advantage of the less sophisticated child. Then when that 15 year old is a 30 year old women who consents to an out of the norm sexual act, we still see her as somehow being less sophisticated and being taken advantage of... Women who choose to be a stripper are being taken advantage of by men. Women who choose to do porn are being taken advantage of by men. Women who choose to have lots of sex just like a lot of their male counterparts do, are considered to being used and taken advantage of by men... However, male strippers, porn stars, gigolos, etc are never seen as being taken advantage of by women... Why is this?
Quote:
A dominatrix (plural dominatrixes or dominatrices) or mistress is a woman who takes the dominant role in bondage, discipline (in the sexual-fetish sense of the word) and sadomasochism, or BDSM. A common form of address for a submissive to a dominatrix is "mistress", "ma'am", "domina" or "maîtresse". Note that a dominatrix does not necessarily dominate a male partner; a dominatrix may well have female submissives, nor must the role of a dominatrix involve physical pain toward the submissive; her domination can be verbal, involving humiliating tasks and servitude. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dominatrix
Do you feel like these men are being exploited because they need money or have mental issues? Do you empathize with them, or do you have a double standard?
Last edited by DoniDanko; 09-20-2013 at 12:24 PM..
Most all women absolutely LOVE to be dominated by a man during sex. Here is the really screwed up part, and I know most will disagree but I want to show you a different angle to this dilemma. Here is a bold statement: A woman who doesn't like her SO watching porn, will in the end respect him a ton more if he continues to do as he pleases and tells her so, than she would if he actually stopped watching porn per her request and apologized for it. Many women want to change a man, only to find out that once he changes into the exact man she has dreamed of, she is no longer attracted to him nor does she want him a s a partner. Life shows you this time after time, but you will see it only if you are observant. A man who gives up all control in a relationship, and lets his woman shape him as she pleases, is a lost cause who will also lose his woman. Advice for men - Be men.
Most all women absolutely LOVE to be dominated by a man during sex. Here is the really screwed up part, and I know most will disagree but I want to show you a different angle to this dilemma. Here is a bold statement: A woman who doesn't like her SO watching porn, will in the end respect him a ton more if he continues to do as he pleases and tells her so, than she would if he actually stopped watching porn per her request and apologized for it. Many women want to change a man, only to find out that once he changes into the exact man she has dreamed of, she is no longer attracted to him nor does she want him a s a partner. Life shows you this time after time, but you will see it only if you are observant. A man who gives up all control in a relationship, and lets his woman shape him as she pleases, is a lost cause who will also lose his woman. Advice for men - Be men.
And you've slept with "most women" to be able to make your grandiose claims? You know so little, you're a joke.
How do you know that some women do not enjoy it just like there are some men out there who enjoy having a woman dominate them? Why is it that women who enjoy rough sex are seen to as victims, but men who do dominatrix porn are not? There are women out there who like having their hair pulled, being slightly choked, being spanked, being dominated, etc... Why are sexualy open women always seen as being a victim in one way or another? Why do we as a society put grown women in the same category as we do children when it comes to the act of consenting to sexual acts? For example, if a 15 year old wants to have date with a 21 year old, we'd it as the 21 year old is trying to take advantage of the less sophisticated child. Then when that 15 year old is a 30 year old women who consents to an out of the norm sexual act, we still see her as somehow being less sophisticated and being taken advantage of... Women who choose to be a stripper are being taken advantage of by men. Women who choose to do porn are being taken advantage of by men. Women who choose to have lots of sex just like a lot of their male counterparts do, are considered to being used and taken advantage of by men... However, male strippers, porn stars, gigolos, etc are never seen as being taken advantage of by women... Why is this?
Do you feel like these men are being exploited because they need money or have mental issues? Do you empathize with them, or do you have a double standard?
I'm not going to argue with you about what I like or why. If you get off watching women treated like dogs, have at it.
For me, I dislike women's being likened to animals or degraded--watch this nasty ***** get what she deserves, that kind of thing. Spit on, choked, take it you ugly ****, etc.
Unlike actors in a movie who aren't actually being shot, the woman in those scenarios is enduring those things. Many are obviously exploitative, either someone who needs the money or who has mental issues. As another woman, I empathize with her.
Yeah I don't watch porn like that. I've watched a TON of porn and haven't seen that often. I don't search for it tho either...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascension2012
Most all women absolutely LOVE to be dominated by a man during sex. Here is the really screwed up part, and I know most will disagree but I want to show you a different angle to this dilemma. Here is a bold statement: A woman who doesn't like her SO watching porn, will in the end respect him a ton more if he continues to do as he pleases and tells her so, than she would if he actually stopped watching porn per her request and apologized for it. Many women want to change a man, only to find out that once he changes into the exact man she has dreamed of, she is no longer attracted to him nor does she want him a s a partner. Life shows you this time after time, but you will see it only if you are observant. A man who gives up all control in a relationship, and lets his woman shape him as she pleases, is a lost cause who will also lose his woman. Advice for men - Be men.
Hahaha...
Pick and choose your battles dude.. just because one might be ok not watching porn does not mean his woman shapes his life.. I have told off so many women in my life that came crawling back, I know how it works.
Is openly watching porn that important to me? My gf has a pretty good point.
Tell me what you'd do in my situation.
My gf never turns me down for sex unless she is sick or something. Every morning, afternoon, night, etc. As much as I can she wants it and then some. Does not matter what kind of sex I want. Where I want it she loves it.
In fact, she wants it more than I do.
How can I possibly justify waking up in the morning, going in the bathroom, and watching other women have sex and getting myself offn instead of her getting me off like she does 99% of mornings when I wake up.
How do I tell her "I know you want to have sex babe, but I'd rather do it myself and think about someone else"
Thats just a prick move in my book. I do still watch porn occasionally, but rarely..
LOL why not address my point? If some women enjoy it, then why is it a problem? Why assume that they must be on drugs or strapped for cash?
Women don't become porn stars because the sex is great. The money is great.
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I'm not going to argue with you about what I like or why. If you get off watching women treated like dogs, have at it.
