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LOOKS for men are incredibly important. For myself, it's THE MOST IMPORTANT thing to consider dating a woman. But it's not the one feature that would make me stay with a person. If she's a cheater, verbally abusive, bad saver, etc etc etc I wouldn't bother.
C'mon, I've read so many male posters admitting the importance of looks. What do you want men to say?
I don't know how you look in person, but if you were a hottie at 18 then the guys would have preferred you over the hot 37 yr old mom. Of course hot moms get attention, but they would probably get more if they didn't have kids in the first place. And of course hot moms don't care about how many guys are after them. Had to say that for the sensitive mothers out there.
Looks can be important. I don't want refugee-skinny or morbidly obese. From athletic to curvy can be attractive in the right person.
If you look like you're a Tonya-Harding type, I won't be interested. I look at hands and ragged, bitten nails, home-made tats and junkie-type eye makeup will repulse me.
With me you needn't be a knockout, but really fat and ugly, sorry, call me superficial, but I can't hang with that, romantically.
You are right. But there is a difference my friend,between what men SAY and what they DO.
I'm telliing you,men would jump over the unattractive,single childless friend to get in a relationship with the hot single mom with 3 kids.
Heck,in my own life,guys jumped over me,the single,childless,unattractive 18 year old(at the time) to get to my attractive,37 yr old mom with 13 kids. Yes,13 and they knew it. Yes,its true. Men don't care about anything BUT looks.
That's total Bull sh*t! I don't know of any man who's running to get into a relationship with a women with THREE kids. Sleep with her? Yes. Real relationship, No. Like I said earlier, plenty of attractive women out there with no kids to choose from, without a man having lower his standards and shack up with some other dudes "baby mama".
Also,people aren't thinking of the different scenarios
My mom,at 43 years of age,well,most of us were grown adults over 18 by then
So,a 45 year old childless man,why would he date a 21 year old with a 2 yr old kid when he can date a 44 year old woman with 2 GROWN kids?
Basically,when kids are adults,it doesn't matter. No one needs to go to ballgames,nobody needs to feed them,and so on.
That makes a big difference.
A young mother with a 2 year old really needs to be home with her 2 year old, not out cruising the clubs for boyfriends. A woman with grown children is entirely different.
Also,people aren't thinking of the different scenarios
My mom,at 43 years of age,well,most of us were grown adults over 18 by then
So,a 45 year old childless man,why would he date a 21 year old with a 2 yr old kid when he can date a 44 year old woman with 2 GROWN kids?
Basically,when kids are adults,it doesn't matter. No one needs to go to ballgames,nobody needs to feed them,and so on.
If I was a old 50 something year old man and still chasing skirt, then you're right I probably wouldn't care. I would assume and hope any woman that old, who had kids, that they would all be out of the house by then. But I'm not that old, most women my age still have their kids living with them. So its a no go. I can still find woman my age with no kids or I can date younger.
A young mother with a 2 year old really needs to be home with her 2 year old, not out cruising the clubs for boyfriends. A woman with grown children is entirely different.
Reading this thread makes me want to campaign to shame people into waiting until their thirties for kids. Or sterilize everyone on the planet between 18 and 40.
Reading this thread makes me want to campaign to shame people into waiting until their thirties for kids. Or sterilize everyone on the planet between 18 and 40.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,727,010 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseygal4u
You are right. But there is a difference my friend,between what men SAY and what they DO. I'm telliing you,men would jump over the unattractive,single childless friend to get in a relationship with the hot single mom with 3 kids.
Heck,in my own life,guys jumped over me,the single,childless,unattractive 18 year old(at the time) to get to my attractive,37 yr old mom with 13 kids. Yes,13 and they knew it. Yes,its true. Men don't care about anything BUT looks.
For sex? Probably so. For a real relationship? Hell no. At least not any desirable men anyway.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,727,010 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elained10
@ Nald.........it is infuriating and I try not to let it bother me but most of it isn't even true! They paint the worst picture ever of single parents and it BS! I had never come across anyone ever with a bad thing to say about single parents until here. I was extremely shocked and taken back by the abuse and hateful comment when I first read them. The UK is so different from the US we are generally more accepting of people. When I chose to have my son I never thought for one second I'd be discriminated against by so many people, it's really shocking to me.
I am sick of this attitude that single people owe single parents special consideration just because they are single parents. My rejection of single parents is no different than if I rejected you for being highly religious, being under 5'3, driving a BMW, or not having a HS diploma. The thing all those have in common? You have something I do NOT want to deal with nor am I obligated to deal with. In dating, people are going to reject you for the basis of being a single parent. Adults understand this.
I am sick of this attitude that single people owe single parents special consideration just because they are single parents. My rejection of single parents is no different than if I rejected you for being highly religious, being under 5'3, driving a BMW, or not having a HS diploma. The thing all those have in common? You have something I do NOT want to deal with nor am I obligated to deal with. In dating, people are going to reject you for the basis of being a single parent. Adults understand this.
They don't owe single parents anything. But a mature adult will not demean them nor would an adult scoff at your preference.
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