difficult girl to read (dating, women, love, kiss)

[irish_bob]

so I thought id give this story its own thread as its probably unfair to hitch it to someone elses thread like I did for a few posts


anyway , I went on a date six weeks ago with a girl I met online , to say she made an impression on me is an understatement , this girl is thoughtfull , softly spoken though not remotely boring to talk to , she is also redicolously modest considering she is really pretty ( though a little overweight which I don't care about btw )

anyway , I said towards the end of our date that I hoped it wouldnt be the last one , to which she replied " I don't think it will " , she was unable to see me the following week due to her dad being ill in hospital , we text each other every three days or so but she called me on evening to say she wasn't fully over a breakup and that she was removing herself from the dating scene , i might add that i told this girl during the same conversation that i liked her and wanted to get to know her better , i was of course disappointed to hear this and fully expected never to hear from her again

two weeks later ( around three weeks ago ) she text me out of the blue to say hello and asked me for my personal email , since then she has emailed me around every four days to say hello , she also said she would like to meet up for coffee some time , so i asked her out for coffee two days ago and yesterday we met up

i made sure to not give her a hug or kiss upon greeting her ( handshake ) so as to show respect to our alledgedly plationic relationship , the one hour coffee meet up was extremely pleasant and at the end , we both walked out to the carpark together , i went to shake her hand to say goodbye and she leaned in to kiss me on the cheek , she also sent me a text less than two hours later to say it was lovely meeting up again

now while i do still like this girl and would be really happy to date her , im conscious of the fact i might be a guy she likes but who is merely a friend , that said , we didn't know each other prior to our first date so im not sure this is a typical friendzone scenario , usually when someone rules out romance ( for whatever reason ) you don't hear from them again , this girl regained contact with me two weeks after she gave me a speech about unresolved personal issues re _ a relatively recent messy breakup , she does not strike me as a silly game player who gets an ego boost from having coffee with guys

could it be possible that she reappraised things and decided she was willing to get to know me afterall , she told me during our first date ( and it was outlined on her online profile ) that she believes connections with someone grow through time , like i said shes a thoughtful type , into books , shy , soft spoken

im not going to be a sap but if i thought this girl might come around in time , id be happy to keep things cosy for a while

[hawaiiancoconut]

IMO, you've been friendzoned. I wouldn't expect too much from her, and I wouldn't put too much effort in her. She is getting over a relationship.

[Duchamp Dude]

Dude, women who are not over their whatever effing messy breakup there was should not be dating. As a grown man, when you hear that kind of thing, you need to cut her loose and run. It's going to be as difficult as shaking the peepee after the leak, when droplets keep dripping and you wish you could squeeze it all out like toothpaste

Also, the daddy thing is a front. She came back out of the blue because some other dude she was trying to get with blanked out and you are the contingency Bob That's like designated Dave.

[Jaggy001]

Too early to tell what her intentions are. Let this thing run a bit longer. Maybe it will work, maybe not but it sounds like it is worth a try.

[santafe400]

I'm going with the "friend zone" option. The reason being is that it sounds like everything has been dragging on with no consistent dates or steady communication. Indeed, women do send "mix" messages and even the biggest PUA can be fooled from time to time. The "not fully over her break-up" line has got to me one of the lamest, but most accurate lines use to put the final nail in the coffin.

[irish_bob]

Originally Posted by santafe400

I'm going with the "friend zone" option. The reason being is that it sounds like everything has been dragging on with no consistent dates or steady communication. Indeed, women do send "mix" messages and even the biggest PUA can be fooled from time to time. The "not fully over her break-up" line has got to me one of the lamest, but most accurate lines use to put the final nail in the coffin.

But it wasn't final


I sense most people delight in telling someone they were friendzoned

[mainebrokerman]

no matter what label you put on it-it sounds like she's not interested in anything serious now- and thats ok,,

ive always said-nothing wrong with decent friends- but this also leaves you open to date other women,,,since she doesnt want anything serious

most people are pretty f------ed up, carrying around unresolved baggage,,, so if, you want her as just a friend and "see what may happen" thats ok..

i once ended a potential relationship, because things werent progressing as fast as i wanted,,,,that was a mistake,

you may just be the guy that bridges her trust back in men,,, and she may be a great catch in a couple months,,,,she just doesnt seem ready now,,,and thats ok

[Slanderous]

Date other women.

[irish_bob]

I have been dating other women

[Jaggy001]

Don't overthink this. If you enjoy her company then that is reason enough to see here again. Then, if it progresses into a romantic relationship that is a bonus. Worst case scenario is that you have gained a friend.

And, like I already said. Way to early to draw hard and fast conclusions.