what is it about chivalry? (man, attracted, gays, older)
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I like these things as a sign of politeness/consideration... But I've also opened doors for men, carry my groceries, order my meals. When we are traveling, he does carry the most luggage though - He's stronger than me!
The one thing I always like is being dropped off/picked up at the door when on our date because usually I am wearing rather high, uncomfortable heels that I don't want to get dirty in the parking lot... it's all about the shoes. If I'm just going to the grocery store, I wouldn't expect to get dropped off at the front while he parks.
See, this is another example of why chivalry is ridiculous. Why should I, as a man, score or lose points based on my willingness to accommodate your desire to don footwear that is not suited to the task of ummmmm, oh geez, I don't know....WALKING???
You gotta love the modern day woman. They want their cake and eat it too. They're quick to scream "equality" and want to be equal to men, but then turn around and say they want chivalry and a traditional man/relationship. They want to be able to pick and choose which ever one is convenient/beneficial at the time. I wish these hypocrites would make up their mind, do you want men to sill be traditional or do you want to "equality"? Because if we are truly equal, then I shouldn't have to take off your coat for you like you were child or open car doors for you or pay for your meals. You should be able to carry you own weight and do these things on your own.
It makes a woman feel protected and secure. My husband opens doors and orders for me and we've been together 6 years. I can do these things myself, but when he does it, I feel like he's being attentive.
See, this is another example of why chivalry is ridiculous. Why should I, as a man, score or lose points based on my willingness to accommodate your desire to don footwear that is not suited to the task of ummmmm, oh geez, I don't know....WALKING???
Personally, I like being with people who are considerate and caring. But you can do your own thing if it works for you!
Oh - and just because I want to be able to work and vote doesn't mean that I want to BE a man or be treated like a man in romantic settings. I'm a woman. Some women do want to be genderless in the romantic world but I like feeling like a woman. And being considerate and caring is a two way street. I'm a considerate and caring person so I choose to be with people who are the same.
I've done basically every one of those things, with the exception of ordering for my dates, because most women I come across have unique preferences in there food.
And putting gas in her car, unless I'm out driving her car by chance and it was getting low, then yeah I'd probably put some gas in her car.
I don't see a problem in doing those things. I don't really expect something in return.
Some posters here make it seem like no one does these things. I see people doing it often enough, including myself.
You gotta love the modern day woman. They want their cake and eat it too. They're quick to scream "equality" and want to be equal to men, but then turn around and say they want chivalry and a traditional man/relationship. They want to be able to pick and choose which ever one is convenient/beneficial at the time. I wish these hypocrites would make up their mind, do you want men to sill be traditional or do you want to "equality"? Because if we are truly equal, then I shouldn't have to take off your coat for you like you were child or open car doors for you or pay for your meals. You should be able to carry you own weight and do these things on your own.
Well, do you want to take back the women's right to vote? Do you want women to be unable to work? On the flip side of that - do you want to date men? Women being equal under the law doesn't have anything to do with romantic relationships. I would assume that most men that scream about this lack of equality in all aspects of life wouldn't really want to date a woman that was just like a man.
Tier 1: the basics
Opening doors
Letting the woman go first (ordering, sitting down)
Making sure she gets home safely
Tier 2: super old-school
Walking on the outside (curb side)
Dropping you off at the front, then parking the car
Helping you with your coat/jacket
The man I am dating now does all these things. including things like ordering for me, carrying any bags, etc. He seems to like it and I like it too, so why not?
It's not like I do nothing in return... I give him back rubs, massage his temples when he's stressed, bring him coffee, wine or a drink, cook him dinner, etc. And I like doing that for him. It's just little things I think we do for each other that shows that the other is important to us and worth the extra effort.
EDIT: To be fair, it was hard for me to adjust to him ordering my food for me. But once I realized why he did it (not to be controlling, but he saw it as polite) then I accepted it.
See, this is another example of why chivalry is ridiculous. Why should I, as a man, score or lose points based on my willingness to accommodate your desire to don footwear that is not suited to the task of ummmmm, oh geez, I don't know....WALKING???
This is a good example of chivalry really being about a show of respect, politeness, and courtesy (and not about expectation or demand).
Chances are, if your out on a date, she dressed up to look beautiful, sexy, alluring, etc, in excess of what is "normal" for her for your benefit. She likely spent a lot of time and effort to do so.
So, if you new you were going to park a good distance from the door, and felt like showing your date you are courteous, polite, respectful, or even appreciative (of her efforts), you may decide to be "chivalrous" and drop her off at the door.
Not because she demands it. Not because she expects it. Not because she asked for it. Only because you want to be nice to her.
Personally, I like being with people who are considerate and caring. But you can do your own thing if it works for you!
Oh - and just because I want to be able to work and vote doesn't mean that I want to BE a man or be treated like a man in romantic settings. I'm a woman. Some women do want to be genderless in the romantic world but I like feeling like a woman. And being considerate and caring is a two way street. I'm a considerate and caring person so I choose to be with people who are the same.
Exactly, this makes my point for me.
Specifically, the bolded. You want the benefits of feminism, AND the benefits of chivalry.
Must be nice...
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