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She divorced me, and yes... sometimes they just "want out" there was no cheating or no physical abuse involved. sometimes people just want out. I cant explain it.
She divorced me, and yes... sometimes they just "want out" there was no cheating or no physical abuse involved. sometimes people just want out. I cant explain it.
Okay, fair enough. That doesn't change my advice. If you're not willing to commit to a relationship, don't waste that teacher's time.
Hi Cman, I'm not like you, but I would like to give you some different perspectives. When I read your post I thought to myself, here's a young guy who likes women and given the chance hops from one to the other. The only time it occurs to him that there might be something wrong with that is when he hurts the women he loves.
I hate to say it, but this is probably not uncommon, the way you objectify and use women. And heck there are probably women out there who are the same way? I dunno. I haven't met any, my women friends and I have only been on the receiving end of that stupidity.
It is a lack of self control, and lack of emotional maturity. Those are only things that you get after you realize the pain of staying the same is more painful than the effort of the change.
If you don't want to be like that, then don't. Its just a decision. You have to work on it. There aren't any quick and easy fixes, and there are no easy answers.
There are tons of resources out there for self help, visit a bookstore, or use that computer thingy in front of you to research.
I don't think you're going to find that things will be any better for you unless you decide to make that decision for yourself now, and your pain is telling you it's time.
Thank you foclampt I really appreciate you taking the time to write that. and yes your right... I am immature, and have no idea how to mature myself in that area if you will
Thank you foclampt I really appreciate you taking the time to write that. and yes your right... I am immature, and have no idea how to mature myself in that area if you will
Take some time to yourself. Make your priority to learn what your priorities from this point forward will be. If you are going to hop from bed to bed, do so without any pretense of a committed relationship. You may not have a problem finding willing partners who agree to "no strings attached." You just got out of a divorce and may need to get some shenanigans out of your system. I honestly don't think you'll find too many people who will fault you for this, even. Just do so openly. Hence the advice to stay away from the teacher.
Aw, that's good that you're humble about it. I think I really can understand how you might be feeling right now.
When I started researching what it was I needed to know about relationships it took a while for me to find the right words to look up things. Maybe you could START with the other side of the story, with the womans' perspective, it might be grating, but maybe it will give you some words to start with.
I think our society in general advocates men acting this way, like it makes you more of a stud or something, but I think too that men have feelings, and unless they have some sort of deeper problem with themselves, want to avoid the pain of a broken heart, or of hurting others.
I don't hop bed to bed in all honesty, The teacher is a the type of woman I want to marry.
Okay, I am going to try to phrase it as I understand it. You tell me if I am right.
You want to want to marry this woman. Because if you wanted to marry her you wouldn't want to see what else is out there as indicated in your initial post. Does this make sense?
Well just because I think there are others out there... dosent mean I want to sleep with them. In fact... I don't want to have sex with anyone. I guess im trying to find something that's not out there?
I had a friend tell me.. If your mind wonders about what else is out there, while your still with this woman,,, then she isn't the "one" does this hold any merit?
Well just because I think there are others out there... dosent mean I want to sleep with them. In fact... I don't want to have sex with anyone. I guess im trying to find something that's not out there?
I had a friend tell me.. If your mind wonders about what else is out there, while your still with this woman,,, then she isn't the "one" does this hold any merit?
I think that idea does have merit. That's sort of the point I'm making. I think you have to ask yourself, "If I am wondering what else is out there, on some level it means I'm not entirely satisfied with this person. And if that is the case, do I really want to be with her?" You've really got to be hard on yourself and honest with yourself here.
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