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Hmm. I think that mean people may not know they are mean. Continue to be the way they are, because it is normal behavior for them, then again, maybe they are plain ole stinkin mean....
And like to be that way!
IM TOLD THAT IM MEAN ALL THE TIME BUT I JUST TELL IT THE WAY IT IS .AND BLUNT ABOUT WHAT EVER THE ISSUE .BUT I NOW NO THAT IM JUST A BIG ***** WHO LIKES TO TELL PPL WHAT I THINK NO MATTER HOW THEY MIGHT FEEL OR TAKE IT .IM SORRY TO ALL THOSE THAT I HAVE AND WILL BE A MEAN ***** TOO
I don't think people who are mean know that they are. I have a brother that is a very mean person. In his view, its everyone else that is messed up not him. No one can take a joke he always says. My husband and I cut off contact with him a few years ago for various reasons. He still leaves the occasional voice message or email about what a fat b*&#* I am. My brother was a bully as a child. As an adult, the bullying has taken different forms and is magnified when he is on drugs. He met the female version of himself. Its sad that their kids will be brought thinking that treating people like garbage is a fun thing to do. My brother learned that behavior from my dad, and it gets worse with each generation.
I think it's called the "Bully Syndrome", if not nipped in childhood, it spills over as an adult. They are the nastiest, empytied souled beings walking the face of the earth and the kicker is they don't even know it. lol, what a hell to be in. Never knowing peace with themselves is their payback.
I believe a lot of mean people think they are just fine. A lot of the mean people I know - primarily all the crochety old male lawyers in the firm I work for - have a tremendous sense of self-entitlement. It's sickening. They can be so obnoxious and rude and literally have no clue that everyone thinks they are sh-!tbags. These lovely creatures are also the most chauvenistic males I have EVER encountered in my life and I wonder how on Earth their spouses put up with them.
have a tremendous sense of self-entitlement. It's sickening. They can be so obnoxious and rude and literally have no clue that everyone thinks they are sh-!tbags.
I have to agree this is also a common denominator, the ARROGANCE factor and self-entitlement
I have spent many years wondering about this question myself. Do you think we will ever know the answer? I had a person once tell me that these "mean" people are really unhappy and they see someone that is happy and they are jealous, so they try to cause them trouble. Mean and jealous seem to be partners. Just be glad it is not you that is the mean one. Just stay away from them as much as possible and try to be polite to them so they won't have an excuse to take "whatever" out on you.
I got one family member to admit it. She says "I'm not mean, It's just the way I talk".
my in-laws used that excuse for years, "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings so it doesn't count." To me that is just a way of evading and avoiding responsibility, same as saying "can't you take a joke" or "you're too sensitive" they deny they even have a problem.
I've had to deal with a mil and a sil like this...
I have no idea why the mil is like this but I stopped it quick with the question:'Why do you think it's ok to talk to me like that? My own mother doesn't talk to me like that." That was the end of that.
When my brother's wife 1st joined the family we found she was very headstrong, knew everything and it was her job to teach everyone how to do things...if she had an audience for a rude comment, it was even better.
She learned quickly this attitude didn't set well with us...when we started calling her on it she would say.."I was only kidding." I would come back with..."So attempting to belittle someone in front of everybody is funny? I don't understand that humor."
After I met her mother I understood why she acted the way she did.
People learn from there parents..my bil truly thought it was ok to hit my sister because his dad told him that's how you keep your "woman" in line. He saw his dad hit his mom for years. Lot's of counseling later he realized his dad was wrong.
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