I want a baby and my husband doesn't and wants me to stop getting upset about it
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I have accepted the miscarriage and not still in mourning over the loss. I am mostly upset at the fact that I feel I can never have a child and the insensitivity of my husband as a result.
How exactly is this insensitivity manifesting? Are you commenting on his merely refusing to change his mind on the subject? Or something else? Because not changing his mind about it is not the same as being insensitive about it.
If he is attending counselling with you - that does not say "insensitive" to me either. There are many people who would _not_ attend counselling for something like this and simply tell you to "get over it". So it sounds like he is putting more effort and sensitivity into it than many would.
Thanks for the update, OP. I really feel for you. I know women who have multiple kids who went through a depression when they decided for sure they weren't having anymore kids. I think it is hard for a lot of women to come to the end of their child bearing years even if they already have kids, never really wanted kids, or whatever. Maybe it is biology that makes us sad - I don't know. I don't think guys understand that mourning because for them the window never really closes.
I think its a little insensitive of the OP to be saying her husband has been jerking her around for the last 3 years. Having a baby is a life changing event. As the OP knows, she wants her life to change by having one. Her hubby doesnt want that major change in his life, for the rest of his life. Its not like getting a puppy. He's apparently very happy with how his life is, knows what he wants in life, and a baby isnt a part of it. As much as the OP wants a baby, he doesnt want one.
I dont know how much of this is financial, but their next 20 years will be critical on whether they can retire when they want to. Having a baby now would ruin those plans, unless they are wealthy.
The OP is simply going to have to stop wanting what she can't have. I know that sounds cruel, but this isnt something she didnt know from the start. Being miserable isnt going to help her marriage, if that is whats supposedly important to her now.
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