Young woman sleeping with older man...unfamiliar territory for me. (married, family)
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A guy who doesn't care doesn't bring food to work and fix things in your apt for you if you are just a FWB.
This simply isn't true. I've had girlfriends who I had no interest in a long term relationship with. I'd fix dryers, I'd bring them food at work, etc. Most of the time my reasoning was, "I hope I get laid today" not because I had feelings developing.
Sorry, your statement is just flat out false, take it from a man.
This simply isn't true. I've had girlfriends who I had no interest in a long term relationship with. I'd fix dryers, I'd bring them food at work, etc. Most of the time my reasoning was, "I hope I get laid today" not because I had feelings developing.
Sorry, your statement is just flat out false, take it from a man.
I'm tending to agree with tom ford. Most guys just laying pipe don't act as servicemen and delivery boys... yeah, some do and but in the bigger scheme most fwb type of guys just aren't doing those types of things.
Maybe in your case, but not across the board, most certainly.
I'm tending to agree with tom ford. Most guys just laying pipe don't act as servicemen and delivery boys... yeah, some do and but in the bigger scheme most fwb type of guys just aren't doing those types of things.
Maybe in your case, but not across the board, most certainly.
Even if I'm just sleeping with a girl, my mother raised me better then that. You should always be respectful. I mean, if someone called me up and needed help doing something around their house, just a guy friend, I'd at least come and show them how to do it.
You've slept with quite a few men, which indicates that you like this kind of arrangement, that is, not a permanent relationship. I would seriously consider if that is what you want in life. Keep in mind, that is a very different thing than a FWB. That usually involves some kind of long term commitment. It involves some sacrifice. For most people, it means the end of sex with others. And, whether you realize this or not, most women somewhere along the line want children, and that usually works better in a long term relationship.
Now, you need to also consider the man your sleeping with. He's almost twice your age. He doesn't seem interested in any of those things that make for a long term relationship. So he is a very bad candidate for anything other than sex. He likes you, probably, cause he's having such a good time with a young attractive women, not someone half worn out like those his own age. He certainly will not want to start all over with a child, should you decide that's for you. You've reach a point in life that most people reach. They reassess what they are doing with their life. Time to give it some thought. Forget fantasy. Time to consider realities. Good luck.
Been in your situation. I was the older man 30 years difference. The man has feelings for you to, he is just not telling you....trust me. A guy who doesn't care doesn't bring food to work and fix things in your apt for you if you are just a FWB. I have had FWB and that is what it was...sex and nothing else. You should tell him how you feel and see what he has to say. If you are not sure how you feel, tell him how you *think* you feel. Ask him how he feels. Get it out in the open.
Also, it is ok to love or think you love someone much older or younger....it just happens. Most importantly, don't let others influence your decision. We had a great time and it is possible for tow with a drastic age difference to work. Just agree up front what you expect from each other....ie kids, marriage etc.
I ended my relationship because I felt I was holding her back from a "real" relationship with a guy her age. I miss her and she misses me. we are both with people now we are not "in love" with. Don't blow it because of age. It's alright to start out as FWB and fall in love. It happens.
Why did you feel you had to end the relationship for her to be able to have a "real' relationship? Not that I disagree with you. I think you did the right thing, both for you and for her. But I was wondering what, specifically, you meant by that.
As someone who has been in relationships with older men, I don't agree that a 30 year age difference would work long term. Anything more than 20 years is pretty iffy, imo. Can real feelings develop? Sure. But you need more than that for a relationship to work.
I'm sure there are VERY rare instances where it has worked. In most big age difference relationships, though, I think it works more for the older individual (usually the man). He'd be pretty darn happy, I imagine. But I fail to see how that would be at all advantageous for the younger person involved (usually the woman), long-term.
People change as they get older. The two people would likely come to be at completely different places in their lives and would want and need entirely different things.
Now, you need to also consider the man your sleeping with. He's almost twice your age. He doesn't seem interested in any of those things that make for a long term relationship. So he is a very bad candidate for anything other than sex. He likes you, probably, cause he's having such a good time with a young attractive women, not someone half worn out like those his own age. He certainly will not want to start all over with a child, should you decide that's for you. You've reach a point in life that most people reach. They reassess what they are doing with their life. Time to give it some thought. Forget fantasy. Time to consider realities. Good luck.
I've said this in other threads, and I'll say it again: I think a good policy on CD would be that anyone who feels the need to make negative comments about over 40 people (whether the poster is that age or not) should be required to post pictures of themselves.
Kind of ironic, Dr. Clean, that you are complaining about 'hater women' over 40, when YOU are quite a vociferous hater, yourself, and presumably over 40.
There seems to be a common thrust (ahem) in your posts I've read, and that is that you seem to be DESPERATE to prove how irresistible you are to all these much younger women. I have to wonder why. Today, though, is a real treat: we get to hear how much one of your girlfriends "misses your d*ck."
My goodness. A stud muffin AND so classy. How DO you do it?
well, believe it or not, I don't have women (good try, i get it that it's trendy to call men mysoginist when they don't agree with a woman's opinion) and in fact whole heartedly support their effort to find relationship happiness. but what do dislike is dating and relationship dogma that is out of sync with reality. and don't kid yourself that i come to this forum seeking validation or acceptance of me and my opinion, i clearly understand that i am a minority in my thoughts, activities and lifestyle.
and that goes for your perception of me attempting to present myself as a stud muffin because i only mentioned the d*ck comment to confirm OP's good sex comments and to demonstrate there can be physical attraction and good sex involved in relationship age differences between an older man and a younger woman, but that also applies if the gender roles were reversed --and i agree with you that self-maintence for older woman can make quite a difference in their attraction to other men. the reality is physical attraction is just integral to sexual attraction and chemistry, and ppl who try to de-emphasize it over companionship qualities seek a different kind of relationship, they are seeking friendship.
and as far as not being classy, well i plead guilty since i would like to think that raw unfiltered comments from my perspective as an older gentleman probably serves a greater educational purpose than not offering a contrary view. i am not a troll but oh do i know that many don't like my opinion and how i live my life. but do you really think i lose any sleep over it, particularly since i no longer accept the commonly accepted social dogma on dating and relationships??? sorry, these days i define my life on my own terms, not others.
oh do i know that many don't like.........how i live my life.
There was that thing with the giant vat of Nutella, the flock of sheep and the crotchless panties that was a bit questionable, but hey, whatever floats your goat......
Quote:
Originally Posted by newdixiegirl
Good for you! And I mean that, too.
But I'd like to think (or at least hope) that the vast majority of us over the age of 40 feel the same way.
Sorry, no way you're over 40. Unless that profile pic was taken in the 90s. Just sayin......
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